The ironies and oddities of life

hopper_2008

18 years ago

I added my opinion to a topic about weddings not to long ago and this is just a follow up. While I am not the other woman, I am the second wife and I recently attended my DH's oldest daughters wedding. I spoke in my last post about how my husband would never comply with a request to sit somewhere I wasn't, even if it was his daughters' "special day."

We attended the wedding, it was fine. DH sat next to me, in the front row, the whole time. I don't know if he was asked to seat me somewhere else, but I doubt it.

Anyway...the ironies of life...as it turns out, daddy's little girl WAS the other woman. The man she married that day was married when he met her and she became his affair. She was also living with her previous SO when she became involved with her now husband. I don't know the details of how they met or the nature or quality of their previous relationships (I did meet her previous SO and liked him well enough.) If that wasn't bad enough, my husband's oldest son is having an affair. While he brought his wife and three young children to the wedding, his wife was quite vocal (and intoxicated) enough about his father of the year act. She also has no idea the union she was there celebrating was rooted in an extra-marital affair.

Ah...the complexities of human relationships. Its tragic really, and I've used it as the basis of a short fiction piece (theme: "judging" acts of perfidy is impossible in the face of this complexity.) In a strange way I feel vindicated, that is to say, no one...can say anything...about my relationship...ever again. Thanks.

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Comments (4)

dotz_gw
18 years ago
Hopper, I do remember somewhat of your post, being 2 nd wife myself and attending SSs wedding and what a disaster THAT turned out to be...But I have to ask, if you dont mind..Did you find out AT the wedding she was getting married to the partner in her affair, and the son at the same time?Yikes...People that live in glass houses.......
hopper_2008
Original Author
18 years ago
I actually had an inkling about the son. I warned DH about it. If they split there will be a NASTY custody battle, she will get custody of the children and move back to where her family is from and DH's relationship with his grandkids won't be what it was. Not through any malice of course on her part, just the natural byproducts of time and distance. DH didn't think that his son would ever do that, particularly because of his sanctimonious stance on literally everything. DH's daughter in law confirmed it not particularly at the wedding, but in the hours of pre-party leading up to in the hall.

The bride's affair I admit was sort of a shock. Her maid of honor (her sister) had been trying to de-stress with some much needed liquid refreshment...although she had a little too much before her toast during the reception. The bride frantically reminded her "don't mention our timeline!" in the toast. It was explained to me by the maid of honor, that the groom's family doesn't know she was the affair, and she would like to keep it that way. I'm not a tattletale so I never said anything to DH. Not my business. Maybe his first wife was cheating on him, I don't know.

But yeah, this is beyond glass house syndrome. This is building the crystal palace at the bottom of a quarry.
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dotz_gw
18 years ago
LOL Note to self....Skip the Jagerbombs before wedding......
sylviatexas1
18 years ago
"DH didn't think that his son would ever do that, particularly because of his sanctimonious stance on literally everything."

oh dod! the sanctimonious ones are the worst.

I've gotten so cynical that any time I hear that some man is on the, say, League for Decency in Marriage, my first reaction is that he must be messing around on his wife, & any man who's on the Anti-Child Sexual Abuse Committee is probably playing with little boys!

cynical, I know.

The ironies and oddities of life

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hopper_2008
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The ironies and oddities of life

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dotz_gw

hopper_2008Original Author

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hopper_2008
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