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cancer update

17 years ago

Just thought I would provide an update for those of you who were so supportive of my freaking out a couple months ago. It is very good news at this point.

BF had his prostate removed last Monday, and at this time everything looks good. He had a couple complications after surgery which were resolved and he is now recovering well. The surgeon thinks he got it all, although he is not declaring BF "cancer-free" until after the first year of monitoring his blood work for signs something is still there. But at this time they think it's gone and there is no recommendation for follow-up radiation or other treatments, which is very good news. I have learned way more about all the various treatments for prostate cancer and what they do to you (prostate removal is bad enough but is not the worst) than anyone really should know... I have long passed the stage where someone should have told me to put down the computer and step away. Although I have at least been smart enough not to discuss what I've learned with him unless he brought it up first :).

He also finally told his kids the week before surgery, which makes me happy. They needed to know (there is a genetic component), and while his ex I'm sure would have pressured him to tell them (so I wouldn't have had to do that), I'm still glad he made that decision on his own.

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Comments (4)

dotz_gw
17 years ago
Great news Quirk!!!! Smart enough not to discuss what I ve learned on the computer!!! Yikes,me too!!!LOL..heres to your DHs speedy recovery....
quirk
Original Author
17 years ago
thanks, dotz. I hope your DH is also doing well and continues to do so. Did you decide what to do about talking to SSs? I wasn't sure how to respond to your question. I think they should know; as a daughter, I would want to know if it were my parent (although I'm not at all sure, especially my dad and SM, that they'd tell me). But at the same time, I know that I would not have gone behind BFs back to tell his kids. When push comes to shove, my loyalty is to him, not them. It also helps that their mother knows; I would have been much more likely to push him to tell them otherwise.
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dotz_gw
17 years ago
Hi Quirk, Altho DH has 3 Drs and doesnt go 90 days without seeing one or the other, he s OK..He did tell SS1 he may have to go on disability and would find out soon..SS1 made no further inquiries, so I m guessing he just doesnt care...SS2 is much closer to DH, but also younger(teenager)so I guess I ll just encourage DH to tell him as much as he thinks he can process at his age...As for the mother, information blackout!!! When DH was in critical condition, and I called son to hospital, Ex went and called ALL her ex in laws....They were furious with me for not calling them, but to tell you the truth, they never entered my mind, I was too worried...After surgery, when DH found out they had been called, he was furious, he has been estranged from them for years..But EX made it HER business to call them, sigh, but thats another story, LOL....The best Dotz
norcalgirl78
17 years ago
quirk, very glad to hear! hang in there and best wishes!

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