I have a few ideas. When I think of fast, I think of Silverlace Vine, Fallopia baldschuanica. healthy, vigorous growth easily within a year and will have lots of flowers to boot, but the shade might be a hinderence to it. Kudzu is far more dramatized than it really is, the only reason I would shy away from it is, again, the shade. Kudzu is only rampent once it gets full sun, high heat, and lots of water. Conversely, if you want something that kills even kudzu and grows nearly as fast in shade as sun. The Air Potato, Dioscorea bulbifera is a no-nonsense, incredibly easy vine that has huge, beautiful, metallic leaves and with the added bonus of growing bulbis at the leaf axils. These can produce new Air Potato vines, which you can plant just like potato spuds. This post was edited by VineWorld on Wed, Mar 6, 13 at 21:33

Thanks for all the support!! Yes its been almost surreal...like Iam watching it all unfold in front of me but its happening to someone else-then i wake up from my daydream only to realize its happening to me, I am peeved at Ed tho...he let us leave the office the day of settlement with no where to go. I am thankful to my inlaws but since they are not used to having guests it was very uncomfortable. so we had nothing. I feel he at least could of had us stay at hotel or even pay for dinner!! I mean even have us over for dinner!! I had nothing here at all. That is all behind us now-there is no where to go but forward!! I am still waiting for a real settlment date...maybe either August 21-28, the good news is that the new buyer does not need to have an inspection or ap praisal so she can save the cash as well as the time!! So we are living with only the bare minumum...our beds are just mattresses on the floor, we have just a sofa and loveseat. our TV is on and old stand as the tv console is packed away and too big to move. I have work clothes and some knock around clothes here and just one large pot and 2 fry pans to cook....paper plates and plastic cutlery! But we are getting by alright. As for being strong...yea I am strong. If i felt kicking and screaming would have helped the situation then believe me I would have done it! But being a calm person I held it together...there have been other things going on in my world that all seem to happen during this summer that I haven't talked about publicly...so losing this deal was just part of it. I am quite sure once I get moved in and start living my new life I will have my breakdown its just right now I simply do not have the time LOL!!! Hopefully I will get a settlement date by Monday after the teacher gets a look at all the reports...I will keep you all posted!! CHEERS! Susie

I kind of agree with TOS. I was 14 when my dad and stepmom married. I love my stepmom dearly. But if she had stepped into my life and declared that my housekeeping skills, table manners, etiquette, personal hygiene, and manner of dress were all lacking even if it were objectively true, I would not have been receptive. Or if she had stepped in and tried to "share" her interests rather than getting to know me and learning what mine were. I suspect you got off to a bad start with your stepdaughter. I'm sure you meant well, but the mere fact that she told you that you might be able to change her dad, but not her, suggests that what you saw as "help", she saw as "criticism" and as you trying to change who she is. If you are interested in my opinion, I would suggest that you back off. The two of you have decades of dealing with each other ahead of you. Try to start over, and take it more slowly this time. Let the relationship develop naturally between the two of you, rather than try to force it into whatever mold or expectations you had in mind that it should be because you married her father. You may still find that you don't particularly like each other as people, but you may also find that without the expectations or pressures of parent/child issues, you get along just fine. She is spending time with, and taking advice from, mature members of your church congregation? How could this possibly be a bad thing? I understand that your feelings are hurt that she is not seeking *your* advice, but while I am sympathetic, that is your issue not hers. Do you want to be told whose advice you should be taking? I think that for the sake of your future relationship, if you haven't already done so, you need to completely back off from trying to help or advise her and simply let this girl find herself. Then get to know who she turns out to be... with no expectations of what kind of relationship will develop. Just let it happen naturally.

In response to MountainBreeze.... I agree that its sort of "non-traditional" to ask people to come to a destination wedding that you have no intension of reciprocating their efforts by paying for a meal or cake and punch. BUT I also think that if the guest list is small enough for the people traveling to the wedding you don't even NEED to send invitations. Email, call, have your Mom or someone call... It's always easier to talk to someone about a sticky situation informally than trying to figure out some eloquent way to tell them something they might not want to hear. (you know it comes off impersonal and therefore impolite) Then with the people invited to your reception at home, just make it like a regular invitation...as formal or informal as you want. I mean the economy issues go both ways, but if you go to a family member or a friend personally and say... We can't afford this but love you and wish you could attend; please do if you can afford it as well then you don't even need to worry about half the stuff that I'm sure is on your mind. I have a similar problem have been searching around the web....maybe someone brilliant can help me!! I am getting married in my home town...which I don't live in and neither does my man. We are having a small family wedding with a formal sit down dinner to follow in my home town in Indiana. THEN.... we (my fianc� and I) are coming back "home" to Tennessee to have a follow-up less formal reception celebration with our friends and some of my extended family who also live in TN. Majority of the people who are invited to the wedding are not coming to the Reception in Tennessee. (Why would they it's far away and they already saw us get married?) BUT there are about 50 extended family members (that all live in TN) that I want to invite to the wedding with the anticipation that they will choose to come to the Reception in TN instead of driving to IN. So I was thinking of sending the following: Indiana wedding people get invitations to the wedding with RSVP Cards ( That will Read: Please Reply by X: Accept ____ Decline_____ if accepting: Chicken_______ or Steak________; Tennessee Reception ONLY people get there own seperate invitations to the Reception saying (we were married on XYZ, please join us for a Reception celebrating our marriage at blah blah; Then! Here in lies the problem--what do I do about those 50 family members who I want to invite to the wedding and also give them the choice of coming to the Tennessee Reception? I was thinking of sending them a seperate Reception card (included when I send the wedding invites) that say in a nut shell "in lieu of wedding you can instead attend the Tennessee Reception") Now... how do I word that without sounding like an idiot (see above!) or does anyone of this world wide web have a better idea!!!!! I'm getting married in April of 2011 I've have run out of Freaking Time to be clueless!! Thank you to anyone who responds. StephC.