In years past I have had quite a few big out door parties. My back yard alone is about 1/2 an acre....and ringed with bushes and trees and gardens. The best solution I found was something called "skeeter beater"...granular stuff you sprinkle around a few hours before the party. It worked fairly in combo with yard guard....but every flower it got on became discolored in a day or 2...some leaves too...spotted. New growth and flowers covered it up but.... If I were doing sometning like that now, I would start now being vigilant about any water. I would have a dunk in every birdbath and pool and ask my neighbors to do the same. And I would start soon with spraying every few days to reduce the population. I know...I hate to put that much poision into the air but.... Then the day of....I would do lots of Yard guard....fans aw far as I could string them. Not blowing from the shrubbery into the crowd but from the crowd to the shrubs. and I would have a table with every type of repellant I could think of. No citronella candles...gag! I don't know what your time frame is, but skeeters become most active at dusk, It won't be too bad before that time and once it gets good and dark they sort of go to sleep. So perhaps a second run around the perimeter of the yard about 7:00 would further knock them back. Good luck....sounds lovely! Linda C

Charivari is a banging of pots and pans, shouting, etc., outside the house of the newlyweds after they settle in following the honeymoon, from what I've heard - never attended one. Usually more or less a community thing, especially in rural/cohesive communities where everyone knows one another. Develops into quite a party. Newlyweds have some party supplies on hand, guests usually bring some - including BYOB. Crackers in bed, French sheet it (top sheet and bottom one, are one and the same ... with a fold across the bed, half-way down, alarm clock hidden somewhere hard to find, set to go off at 2 a.m., can with some rocks set on top of bedroom door, near the hinge side (to avoid bonked heads) and door is left ajar (but without the jar on top - but sometimes there's a condom filled with water, set to fall on the enterer's head, if possible), can with rocks left on dresser, with string around a bedpost or something as a pulley to cause it to be pulled off when the door is opened, sometimes sewed up pajamas, etc. Sometimes may block doors shut as they leave, so inhabitants must crawl out a window ... or call a neighbour to unblock the door. This is somewhat risky, though, in case of fire. Like I said - never attended ... but heard stories (possibly juiced up a bit?). I don't think that they've done them much in recent years. ole joyful

LOL! Well, Melvalena, I hope you won't be disappointed. This was from the decorating forum, not the wedding forum, so with apologies to the others for the off-topic post, here is your answer. **** Origin of the term: When we bought our house, it had a big, beautiful living room right in the center of the house, a lovely little study in the front, an enormous family room in the back, and no dining room (the previous 2 owners didn't cook). We use a dining room a lot, often for big groups, and although we used our living room in our old house, we realized that we mostly used the small space in the middle. So we turned the living room into a dining room, and the little front study into a ... what to call it? It serves the function of a living room, but it's too small (about 11 x 12) to call it that, and I just couldn't get myself to say "parlor." My daughter (then 11) named it the "schmooze room," because, she said, "That's where the adults will go to schmooze after dinner." ("Schmooze" is Yiddish for "chat.") When, years ago, I asked the decorating forum for advice on decorating it, the term kind of caught on, and a few other posters now have schmooze rooms, too, and developed a sort of philosophy about it. It seems a lot of people (who are lucky enough to have the space for it) like having a lovely and/or goofy little retreat of a room that doesn't have to be so practical. The (tongue in cheek) guidelines are these: - No computer, TV, or most other electronic items (opinion is divided on radio/stereo, with some people saying it depends on the type of music). This is a room for conversation, reading, and long, schmoozy phone calls (IF you bring a cordless in from another room -- no phone plugged in there). - No leaving anything here. This room always looks nice, even if everyplace gets cluttered. - Try to make any snacks or beverages you bring in special, or at least in a decent dish. No bags of chips. - As this room isn't a heavy use room like a kitchen or bath, it's a good place to be a little impractical, idiosyncratic, and whimsical (like fringe near the ceiling) in your decorating. E.g., this is the place to choose fabrics because the color or texture thrills you, not because they will be durable or not show grease stains (see previous guideline), and bold colors that you adore but that you might be afraid you'd get sick of if they were in the kitchen. - Preferably located out of earshot of TV and children. Children welcome, but for non-messy, grown-up behavior only (no running, fighting, or art projects). Pet rules depend upon how well your pet obeys rules! Lots of people (especially Monablair) on the decorating forum helped, and I feel their presence whenever I am in there. Here are a few pictures of our schmooze room (the artwork is different now, and the colors aren't QUITE as vivid as they appear in the photos).

If everyone will already be there, I would invite them all. I am part of a community that always invites all out of towners to the rehearsal dinner (or whatever the "night before" party is called) anyway, and I know that that is not true in every community. But for a destination wedding? These guests have spent a lot of money and possibly used a good chunk of their vacation time to come to your wedding. To me, anyone who cares about you enough to do that is close enough to be the "inner circle" invited to the rehearsal dinner. It's not like they can stay home. What are they supposed to do instead? Arrange and pay for a restaurant dinner, then spend the rest of the evening sitting in their hotel rooms while you party? If I were one of your relatives, I would be stunned not to be invited to all the parties (and I would feel embarassed, as though the hosts never really expected or wanted me to accept the invitation). I'm sorry if that sounds harsh. Obviously, you can do whatever you want. But remember, you cannot dictate how your guests will feel about it. Do you really want even one of your guests to be thinking, "They think it's okay for me to spend hundreds of dollars to come to Mexico, just so they could have a 'destination wedding,' but I'm not worth the price of supper to them?"