Wanting parents back together...
As a child of divorce I remember thinking wouldn't it be great if my parents got back together.
Yes "secretly" all kids wants their parents together.
But as a child of divorce all grown up whose parents did reunite when my dad got ill.
I can tell you that secretly wanting them back together is a joke ... looking back as most kids of divorce do
Ok the good ole days...
Mom and dad fighting all the time
Mom and dad not speaking to each other at all
Mom complaining to us kids about dad
Dad complaining to us kids about mom
One parent sleeping on the couch or not coming home at all
Walking on eggshells not wanting to piss either parent off because all hell would break loose.
Yes sure my family was dysfunctional ... they made if functional by divorcing.
So what changes after most divorces oh yeah the parents addresses. Some people fight more after they have split than when there were together.
When I split with my ex ... that ended our disagreements.
We became happy people again I had no reason to argue with him and he no reason with me .... we agreed to raise the kids the way we always had nothing changed.
I am sure my kids wanted us back together and stated it several times but I also reminded them that we were not happy together we were better off apart so we could be better parents.
See the reason for divorce is you cannot get along for whatever reason. So after the divorce you should be able to get along ... if you are going to continue in the same manner you did before the divorce why did you bother to get divorced/split up in the first place...
If one left for another ... and you still argue about the other then why get divorced if you are going to continue the same behavior.
If one left because the other didn't hold up their end of the bargain and continue to argue about the same issue why did you divorce its not your problem anymore its theirs or someone elses.
If you left because of different parenting styles now you can raise your kids as you see fit because the other parent is not going to change so why bother if you are still going to complain about it then why divorce them in the first place...
If you parted ways because one parent refused to support their child after the divorce what did you expect them to do suddenly become a supportive parent.
I can't wait for my BC and SC to have kids so I can sit in their homes and when I hear one of them say "clean your room" "go take a bath" "did you brush your teeth" I can say .... why your parent never did maybe even show pictures!!!!
And I'll be sure show up after 8PM and bring cake and soda and give it to their kids.... here have all these sweets and caffiene then head off to bed.
I mention this again because my SS11 was flipping out yesterday literally all over the floor crying and whining called his mother to "tell on me" because he couldn't have soda after dinner. So after all was said and done I dumped out the soda and told him I will never buy soda again. :)
I believe in redirection ... no soda to drink can't flip out because he can't have any. :)