How to get rid of the STEPMOM
14 years ago
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- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
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can mom and stepmom ever get along!?
Comments (29)Dear BioMom, if you think that sending $57 dollars a month, phoning twice a week, sending occasional care packages and contacting the teachers from time to time means parenting an 11 years old and if you really think that $ 300 a month for a child are too much because "I spend that much on my family of 4 people in the house now and that includes diapers and baby wipes! And we dont buy clothing every single month for our children, clothes in our house last a while!" (clothes on 11 year old last a season, maybe, boys at that age outgrow pants, shoes every 3-6 months) and you really believe that "I mean only the rich can spend that kind of money on One child! Dad has to keep a roof over his and his new wifes and two childrens heads anyways, just because Im not his wife anymore shouldnt mean i have to help pay his rent, food and extra's,should it? and what else is there to spend on children, I mean come on ..I pay 50% of all his medical, sports, toys, personal hygene stuff,I buy schoold supply stuff, etc."(out of the $ 57 you send every month ?).......you really live in fairyland and frankly I am not surprised that when after you chose to relinquish the custody of your child, the judge decided not once but thrice to leave your son in what is clearly a loving and stable household and not to subject him to further disruption just because you have put in your mind that now, after remarrying, moving to another state etc..you can now stand up to your parenting role.. And I think the stpmom rightly resents the fact that while she's doing the REAL job of parenting, you still feel entitled to special consideration because you are the biological mother. Well in the real world it is not so: if you up and leave a 5 year old child and somebody else I raises him (everyday, not twice a week by the phone and during the summer vacation), she justly feel she has more rights than you. You write: "I only had one child with this man, what was I supposed to stay unmarried, have no more children and spend the rest of my life, staying close to this man making sure I help with all his bills?", you know that's exactly what the "wicked, cruel, bitter, full of hatred" stepmom did find in her heart to do, staying close to this man, helping him to pay his bills and raising his son, she did exactly what you could not find in your heart to do. Nobody forced you to eave your child. You chose, and everybody, your child, his father and the stepmom had to learn and to adapt to your choice. It is abot time you do it too. And let me tell about money, this woman has put her actions (and her money or her family's money, that she could otherwise spend) where her heart is, toward your son, while you evidently have chosen to do otherwise, till now. And the idea that as this biomom has now her own children so she should just "let you have yours" is completely wrong, children are not property of the parents to leave or take back on a whim but members of the family, to be cared and respected. If you really want to rebuild your relationship with the your son's father and stepmom, you should start to behave like a responsible, dependable person, financially too so they could start to trust you instead of just criticizing and belittle them and the good job they are doing while you are otherwise occupied....See MoreHelp! Stepmom in crisis as mom gets out of supervised visitation
Comments (5)I completely agree with Tamar. I am in your same situation - 12 year old SD we have had custody of for 7 years. She has had weekend overnights EOW the entire time, and each time she returns home she either hates me or hates her mom, depending on how things went and what she was subjected to there. One day she wishes I was her "real" mom, the next her BM can do no wrong. It's eaten me up trying to rationalize with her w/o just saying "your BM is worthless!" IF they don't want to listen no list of things you have done that the BM has not will be accepted. Finally I realized I was dealing with a 12 year old and that I just had to let it go. If she gave me the "you're not my mom" attitude I gave her the "you're not my daughter" attitude . . . which meant her going to dad or BM for the things I always did . . . and finding out she was out of luck. After a few times I think she got the point, and though things aren't perfect now we have reached a more even playing field. I still cringe when she talks about how great it was that her mom came to one of her games when I coach the team, but what do you do? In your heart you know you are doing the right thing, and since you can't lock her in a closet until puberty is over that's about all you have going for you! Best wishes that things will mellow some with time . . . and a little help from your husband to set her straight maybe??...See MoreHow to get rid of your step mom
Comments (15)This is an unfortunately bad outcome. When you do your best to get rid of a step mother, you might be successful in breaking up their marriage, but if you don't succeed, then you are stuck with a bad relationship with your father AND his wife. That's where you are now. Make the best of it and move on. Maybe things will improve with time, but probably the best you can hope for is to have a relationship with your father only. I think the relationship with his wife is too far gone....See MoreRaccoons getting in my garden!! How to get rid of them?
Comments (6)First mistake is leaving your garbage outside and unsecured. You wouldn't do that in bear country and be surprised that you've got bears hanging around the house? Having smelly food garbage out attracts all sorts of animals. If you live in an urban or suburban area, you're going to have raccoons around. That they were living in the neighbors shed is not really the problem...there will be others nearby regardless. Yes, raccoons enjoy corn. Short of building a complete enclosure around your corn, you are going to have an issue with them. They also have good memories and learn from each other. So, unless you plan to take a multi-year hiatus from growing corn, you will have issues. After a few years, you may have success unless a raccoon stumbles by chance into your yard (the cycle will then start over)....See More- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 14 years agolast modified: 11 years ago
- 4 years ago
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