We just go the fair for fun...don't work there. We're not staying over night this year because we have a dog this year and he needs left out. It's also easier to get a restful nights sleep by staying at home and just commuting. The tents don't allow for much quiet and the camper is hard to sleep in because Gram and Pap are up early. In previous years we have stayed, even when DS was a baby. My grandmother is 62~a young great grandmother, actually. Really she's not just on my nerves at this point, she's on everyone's. Last night she had everyone come to the camper for warm-ups and was trying to tell me how to lace my son's shoes and making fun of how my mother taught me to tie my shoes (guess they showed it on Sesame Street years ago and it was easier for me) and I just never learned the way everyone else did...but it works! Then she brought toys over to the camper for Shane that she bought at a yard sale and was yelling at him to only push one button and listen to one sound at a time...I explained that kids don't do that. I said that she didn't have all those noisy battery operated toys with her kids that we do today but that's what kids do. (Actually, it's a duh on her part...why'd she bring the noisest toy she has?) Then because she had DS's shoes and he wanted me to put them on him, she made a comment about he'll never learn to share if he's not around kids! He's around kids and he does share, it's his age and a stage he's in and I said I read in Parents magazine that 3-4 year old know how to share, they just often don't want to. They're always making jabs at me because I'm a SAHM. They had my life dreamed up for me and well, DS came along before I got to start college (I was taking a year off to work before starting). Ever since he was born, she's been trying to tell me what to do, like I can't do it. (She even stood in the delivery room and commented to my mother not to buy him too much because he may not make it..he was premature and we didn't know exactly how the situation was yet but you dont' say stuff like that at a time like that!) I said to my Dad's gf yesterday that I've raised him to this age and I haven't killed him or hurt him or made him sick yet! I guess she did the same with my Mom, too. We hear about everything we do or buy for our DS! How he acts, how we handle the situation, etc. I try to avoid her and we've actually saw them coming at the fair and went another way. Pap even made a comment last night about me maybe wanting to look nice to find someone and I'm with my son's father and have been for 4 years and he's a great father and he's great to me! He even made little comments to my Dad's new gf's daughter (she's 10) about her weight at supper! I really think they're trying to start a fight or something and I'm trying to stay away but I can't keep my mouth shut about some stuff. I'm afraid I will probably have to say something to her to get her to back off. It may not help but at least I did something and didn't allow her to walk all over me and put me down... Thanks, for the comments and advice. ~Leslie~

I think it's just MEN! (sorry guys!) Turning in homework has been an issue for SD for most of this school year and we've stayed on top of it.. she isn't failing, she gets A's, B's & C's but it's been a fight to get her to do and turn in her work. Since BM filed for custody, saying her grades are mostly D's & F's (which is not true.. she's going off her daily gradebook that changes every time SD turns something in or doesn't turn something in) SD has gotten worse about turning in projects and now she's even getting low grades on her classwork... I mean like 3 out of 20 on her spelling test, etc. It's like she's purposefully failing because her mom told her that if she can prove SD's failing in school (presumably because DH is not 'helping' her) then BM thinks she will gain custody. So, it's been an uphill struggle for the last few weeks. Well, on Easter we (DH & I) were taking a road trip and passed an amusement park... one he's wanted to go to for a long time and he again mentions he wants to take SD there. So, about a week later I bought season passes and made a hotel reservation for DH's only weekend with SD in April. DH was served with the custody papers two weeks before our trip. At that point, SD had no missing assignments. The Monday before our trip, she was missing three or four assignments... so I told her we are planning to go to this park and if she has any missing assignments, we are NOT going. Well, DH got upset with me for telling her that... because HE wants to go. So, I tell him that SD needs an incentive to turn in her work and hopefully she will want to go bad enough to turn in her missing assignments... but if she does not, we have to be willing to follow through with the consequence, which may include losing the money on the hotel. The season passes are good for a year and we can go at another time when she deserves it. (we live about 90 minutes from the park... so we really don't need a hotel, but I thought it would be more fun to stay near there... like a mini vacation) Well, two days before the trip she is still missing two assignments and begging her teacher to please hurry up and change the online gradebook to show she turned the other ones in. That night, DH tells me (in private) that we can go ahead and take SD to the amusement park and just make it not fun for her. I ask him what he means and he says "well, if we are at the park and she wants ice cream... we can tell her that if she had turned in her homework, she'd be able to get ice cream but since she didn't we'll tell her she can't have any." I laughed and shook my head in disbelief! Did I marry an idiot?! But, he wanted to go so bad that HE didn't want to lose out... so I told him that if she didn't get her work turned in, I was not going and if HE wants to go take her and 'reward' her, I was not going to be a part of it. Fortunately, for me, her and him... I still don't know how big of an idiot I married because she got the work done and we all went & had a good time. (and no, I didn't discuss it with DH before I said we are not going... but I also didn't discuss it with DH before I bought the tickets... it was a surprise & I paid for everything... tickets, parking, hotel, gas & food from MY separate account.. so when I told him that if HE wants to take her, that meant that HE can pay for the gas, hotel & food. I had already bought the tickets/parking)

Patriffel, I know its a dismay from the mere fact the daily routine life will change. And it will be crowded in the house. BUt you have to set guidelines and define a time limit here. Its doesn't matter if its a stepchild, a biochild, a cousin or best friend. I just had my house usurped for the last month and i had enough. I told my husband ' no more stray dogs, we did our help with two people and now the doors are closed. ' We had two people stay in our house for two different reasons. We set time limits and it worked well but let me tell you , it was a relief when these people left. Both were in a jam. One lost their job and their apartment but she got on her feet quick and was out in a month. The other i gave her 4 months to get on her feet because her husband booted her out of the house. She has worse issues and i'm glad after 2 weeks she left! Its nice to help. Its your husbands son and two grandkids so of course he will be thrilled. But i'm sure after a few weeks that thrill will definitely subside. Its only natural. People need their space. So you need to sit down with your husband and your SS to set a time limit. You tell them its fine but there is a time limit. Set a reasonable time. Now it might be 3 months or more but set the max you can handle and then just deal with it. Its not forever but hey, its a jam, help out a bit , i know you've done your duty but be very open and honest about the time limit and make sure its kept. If several months pass then scrap it out with hubby and tell him , its been so many months and if no progress is made its abuse. Period. If he wants to help his son and his son is not responsible to fix things in a few months, then he can help his son by finding him another place to live and he can baby sit the grandkids. This is another solution. I do not know all the details and of course knowing more info will help all of us to give you advice but we'ld like to hear how its going. THis is not a permanent thing. So do not worry.

Yes........it happens to me, too. Every time we go up north. Bad part is we are trapped in their house unless we decide to pay for their kids to do whatever it is we want to do. We wanted to go sledding last Christmas while we were there. We live in Texas so sledding is a very rare thing and they had just had a TON of snow there. We had bought our kids a sled to share for Christmas and gave it to them before we left. The day after we got there, we wanted to go sledding. "well, our sleds handles are broke so we really can't go, but you can go since you have one". It was all a guilt-trip to get us to buy their kids sleds. So......we did. We wanted our kids to have a good time. I told FDH that we will NEVER, and I repeat, NEVER go there around a gift-giving holiday again. I always take a small token gift for the ladies (FMIL and 2SIL, then this year was a nephew's wife). They were just small candles. Can you believe they actually refused them?! Yes, I hauled them 800 miles and they say "Oh, you shouldn't have; you really shoudn't have; we thought we were only buying for the kids; we didn't have anything for you".