Thanks, Pat and Brenda. Brenda that would just kill me to make that decision and have my dog acting happy when I'd made the decision to put him to sleep. Yesterday off the pain meds for the first time in these 2 months he was acting like his old self. He was following me from room to room wanting to go for a walk and nudging his treat can with his nose. The vet hasn't called yet with his test results, if he's going to fight I will too. I don't believe he's in worse pain from his kidneys, he doesn't act like it. She said he'll go down fast, I'll probably be eating these words in a month like she said, but for today, I'm going to enjoy my dog and give him what chance I can. He's still thumping his tail at me and waiting until I'm finished with dinner to see if I've got any meat left to give him some. This dog isn't ready to die yet. I hope the people who run these dog food companies have pets who suffer what my dog is doing, not nice but he was fine until he ate their food. I sincerely believe in what goes around comes around. You're right too Pat, this is the last dog for me, it hurts too much. It's family. Brenda, this has been our vet through all our dogs too. I look at Jackson and I think I can't do this, not until there is no hope and he's ready to go...

UPDATE When I started "toughening up", "Hardening off" 38 days ago, there were few encouragements. Our temps then were mostly in 40 to 54F range and had 10 more days til our last frost date. Now 38 days later my tomatoes (planted about 25 days ago) are doing fine and we have been having summer like weather for the past 3 days and it will continue for another 3 days, when it returns to average/normal (42 - 62F). Today my plants were experiencing another kind of toughening up : HEAT, temps reaching 82F, in a bright , sunny calm day. Though the soil was moist but some of them were showing faint wiling. So I sprinkled them a bit. They did fine. So they went from one extreme , lows down to 38F few nights ago, to another extreme , 82F. That was their first life experience. SO FAR SO GOOD !

Thanks for all your kind thoughts. Although it's been another stressful couple of months, I can't complain as I'm not the one dealing personally with either of those terrible tragedies; I'm just there for my friends that are, and mourning with them both. As for my parents, like so many of you here have or are still, I'm now stressing about my parents needing care and family . . . but refusing to admit it. Both are in their early-80's and insist on keeping their winter home north of Tampa, which is where they are now. Up until last year, Mom was a little bundle of energy, looking and acting much younger than her age. But, recent knee problems have now caused back and hip problems, which in turn keeps her from exercising, which in turn has caused her to become much weaker and she's in pain a lot. She can't even get her own shoes and socks on anymore. And Dad is in no shape to help her much, having major heart and balance issues himself. They're a pair, all right! They've, thankfully got great doctors and they're well off financially, so money isn't a problem, but they don't want outside help coming to their house to help them and the closest family is my sister in Atlanta, I know they hate to lose their independence or feel like a burden to any of us but we, their children, know it's just a matter of time until one of them falls and hurts themselves badly. Their summer home is in Michigan, which is where 6 of my siblings and their families live . . . but it's 2 hours north of everyone on a lake! I was down in Florida with them a couple of weeks ago, helping them do some major cleaning, yard work, etc. and tried to talk them into moving near family, either to Michigan where my one sis is an RN, or near us, where DH can take care of their health issues and I can do the rest. But, they tell me "Thanks, Hon, but maybe in a couple of years"! My sis (the RN) flies down there tomorrow for a week and maybe she can talk them into it. My brother and his wife may fly down in April. If not, my parents will be back in Michigan in early June and perhaps the rest of the family there can convince them. In the mean time, we all just worry and fret ;^D Geezelouise, I hope that I don't do this to my kids someday! Anyhoo, thanks for letting me vent a bit. Lynn

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