When two names are listed, and a system (manual or electronic) is set up for only one name...the first name listed is usually used.

Does your DH's name come first on checks, correspondence,etc?

Yes monica, hubby's name comes first on everything. Guess that's why I'm non-existent.

When I make a donation usually the thnak you note comes back with either both names or my name. If it gets changed to DH's name only, I write and tell them that no more money will be sent and why. Your are NOT a nobody, but let others know it is a joint donation or they receive nothing. As to a fraternity, instead of giving just generally, find out if they need something and make that donation. I won't make donations unless I know why and where the money goes. Most of the time it goes to the telemarker who send out the donations and the organizations only gets a tiny bit. Is your company name just both names, or a made up name. When DH had a business, it was a made up name and the mail came that way.

I agree with Marie. I don't think that they didn't thank you on purpose, it was how the mail came in as.

But really, was that the purpose of your donation?

Another invisible woman, do we have here?

I agree that it would be a good idea to yank their chain a bit - some more perceptiveness would be a good thing in the hands of people who depend on the public for support.

I think that I've be enquiring also as to the track that donations follow ... and how much sticks to the hands of the various agencies involved along the way.

I assume that, rather than thanking an organization, they want to offer a personalized message.

I just heard a radio program today that dealt with how women couldn't go on the street in a distant society, hundreds of years ago, unless they were in a completely shuttered palanquin.

Actually, we don't have so much to crow about, for it wasn't too many years ago that women here couldn't run for municipal office, or a school board, unless they owned property, and few had any in their name ... even joint.

Stand up for yourselves ...

... dare I say, "girls"?? ...

... female folks!

ole joyful

When I give a donation I don't care if they thank me or my husband. That was not the purpose that I gave. Frankly, I have more to do then worry about whose name is on a rebate. My money is his and his is mine..

A few years ago my husband and I were loading groceries at Walmart when a truck parked beside us. The wind caught his door and put a large chip and dent in my SUV. I talked to the truck owner, got his insurance information while my husband loaded the groceries. The SUV is in my name so I took it to two body shops. We live in a small town so both body shops know us. At one place the car was looked at and the estimate was brought to me. My husband's name was at the top. I was glad his estimate was higher because I sure didn't want him to get my business.

I don't see how a rebate check could come in someone else's name. What name did you put on the form? Was it for something that is registered, a phone or something in his name or something? Otherwise the rebate is entered from the rebate form AFAIK and whenever I get one, it's exactly how it's spelled or misspelled on the rebate form. I use that to track certain things.

For the donation, just tell them you want the thank-you published in your name. I'm sure they'd comply.
That doesn't make sense.

If I fill out a rebate form, it's with my name, not DH's, and even though I have paid for the item with our joint checking account - how would the company know? They aren't getting the check or the debit card transaction - just the copy of the receipt and the rebate application form that you mail them.

If you're offended by thank-you's not addressed to you, then get your own account for paying out charitable contributions. If you use a joint account, the acknowledgment will always go to the first name, or to both names.

I agree, if they are going to take the time to thank someone they should do it right. May as well thank the dog if they don't care to be polite.
We recently ordered and bought a new vehicle. The rebates were in my name and I kept telling the dealer that we had a new rebate coming and check it out. He couldn't find it. Yea, you know why.
When I told him that I like to have credit and good credit at that, I put big items in my name. Heck I do most of the road work when buying for this home, why not have it in my name. It's not 1930 anymore. If something were to happen to my dh, my credit would be already standing in good shape.
There are plenty of places that would like to 'Thank You' and everyone deserves (and likes) a simple thank you. I wouldn't be upset, I'd just tell them why I've stopped donating and give to the agencies that were on top of things.
What really makes me wonder is why o why are we on another list because of a funeral donation? A distant neighbor, my dh knew and I didn't, passed away. My dh went to her funeral and gave a nice donation which went to their "cause". Now this 'cause' got a hold of his name AND ADDRESS. No matter how we try to curb the junk, it finds us. ugg. sorry Hilltop, got off the subject..

Hi toni NE,

Does this new annoyer send a return-addressed prepaid envelope along with their message?

How about collecting some (other) junk mail and sending a sizeable quantity back to them in their envelope?

Wrapped in a note telling them how much you appreciate their messaqe.

ole joyfuelled