Mimi...My Mom started out that way, too, when she still felt time passing...now it could be a day, an hour, it doesn't mattter. When we were considering going away for two weeks in August (before she was placed), I was going to give her a calendar that she could "X" out each day in an attempt to show her time passing and getting closer to our return. And perhaps doing it another way: a sort of "advent" calendar. Patti may certainly have a point: they can simply forget they asked. Does your Mom do that with other things as well? Perhaps ask the same question about when her care-taker was coming, after she'd been and gone, for example? My Mother always enjoyed a soap opera on here at 4:30pm, and started handing me the tv remote to "make it 4:30" so that she could watch it. Alzeimers patients simply revert back to childhood, and telling time can be one thing that they forget how to do. Go. Enjoy your weekend away! I'd been told here many times that I needed to care for myself if I was to do a proper job with Mom....heed that advice. ;-) And if she's cared for, warm, fed, dry, you don't have to worry about her at all! Now go! Shoo!! ;-D

I hear you because I am paying attention. How frightening your recent experiences must have been! As I have already shared with some of you via phone, we were heading towards Mt Rushmore when our rental car (with only 6000 miles) broke down on I-90. The very condensed version--after 3 hours on the side of the road and many conversations with the car rental agency, who was 8 hours away, we were towed to the dealership. I called the rental agency and asked the person I had been dealing with--what do you want me to do with the keys? She said very sarcastically "why don't you just walk into the showroom and had them to someone?". I yelled at her "for the 3rd time, the dealership is closed and there is no one to give the keys to!" She yelled back that she wasn't going to help me if I didn't calm down. I told her that I was the one who was on the side of the road for 3 dangerous and hot hours plus one hour in a tow truck. I told her never mind, I will make the decision on what to do with the keys since she was more interested in scolding me than dealing with the security of the car. I threw the keys in the adjoining corn field. Thank you for letting me vent.

There is an enormous amount of quasi- and misinformation about ADD/ADHD. If a child can be helped with symptoms by eliminating certain items from the diet, whether those items be particular foods or simply preservatives and additives, then they are NOT ADD/ADHD. They have food or food additive allergies or sensitivities. True ADD/ADHD is a genetic variant. I say variant because that is the current thought, is not really considered a disorder any longer. However, ADD/ADHD is sometimes found comorbid with certain disorders such as OCD, general anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, aspergers, tourettes. The reason is that these are all found to affect the same areas of the brain. Ask almost any kindergarten teacher and they will tell you that the kids that bring red jello or or other red dye laden food will have a hyper afternoon. Of course this is probably because of all the sugar associated with those foods and not the dye itself in most cases. Why stimulant medications work: Stimulants work by increasing both blood flow and Dopamine levels in the brain. Not by some magic "opposite" effect. I will include a link to the full medical explanation. Kids who appear "zombie-like" on stimulant meds are likely on too high a dose. It causes hyper-focus symptoms. Stimulant meds do not address other possible comorbid or behavioral problems. Sometimes other medications are needed. Some kids, such as those who are also bipolar, should NOT be given stimulant meds. There are as many variations of ADD/ADHD as there are people who have it. Each case must be treated individually. The upside of ADD/ADHD: Many ADD/ADHDers are highly intelligent and extremely creative. The ability to be a non-linear thinker can be a great gift. Thinking outside the box comes easily. The downside: ADD/ADHDers can be irritating to live with! The poor impulse control, forgetfullness, chronic tardiness, inability to follow through or stay focused on tedious tasks, distractedness (hello...hello...hello...HELLO! huh? were you talking to me?) are considered to be huge social and professional failings. Because ADD/ADHDers get a lot of negative feedback about their behavior, it can cause low self esteem and subsequent depression. ADD/ADHD is not "outgrown" as one ages. There can be a reduced need for medication. Some people find they only need meds under certain circumstances. The issues of impulse control, lack of time awareness, inability to stay focused on tedious tasks still remain. Lack of organization continues to be an issue. ADD/ADHDers are often overwhelmed by complex tasks. They lack the innate ability to break a large project into do-able portions. Fortunately, this can be taught. Lists are very helpful. Stress or depression will exacerbate ADD/ADHD symptoms. What is difficult for ADD/ADHDers is to do embrace the good parts of themselves. Having loving, supportive people around who are patient and understanding is key. When Tom Cruise gets his PhD in psychiatry, I'll give him the time of day. Until then he's just another clueless crackpot in my book. Here is a link that might be useful: How Stimulent Medications Work

Thank you everyone for all your support. I am very happy to have spent the time asking the question. There are lots of titles listed that I completely overlooked and many that I will have to look into. My mom lives in the philippines and is old fashioned. She spent lots of time teaching and helping others as a social worker so maybe those 20th century country tales so I appreciate your suggestions Liz and Yoyobon. Thank you Ccrdmrbks. I am trying to relate to how my mom is feeling right now but I can't imagine it. We just celebrated my eldest sister's marriage last week so I think her emotions must be quite a mixture as well. Miss Read sounds promising. A friend highly reccomended Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe a long time back simply as a read to enjoy but I haven't gotten around to it. Anyone know if it would be appropriate for the situation? Comedy is an interesting idea. Though it may be hard to find something she relates to. I'll ask her and see if she has any favourites. Thank you all again so much, I've got all the titles written down and am going to do some research now! Take care and God bless! : )