My oldest daughter did not sleep well as an infant, and I bought a noise machine at a friend's recommendation. It made a huge difference, and my daughter started sleeping much better. The book "the happiest baby on the block" also recommends white noise as it simulates the womb. I have now moved the noise machine into my youngest daughter's room, and my oldest daughter, now 4, no longer uses it. So she is not dependent on it. However, I did find it helpful to bring it when we slept away from home as it blocked out the noises of a new place and was a familar nighttime sound. The noise machine blocks out the noise of the dog barking, my older daughter yelling, my husband clomping down the hall. In the middle of the night, my younger daughter would probably sleep through all that without the noise machine. But in the morning, the noise machine makes the difference between her waking up at 6 or 7:30. As far as breastfeeding, I was kind of grossed out by the idea (for me, not anyone else). I decided I would try, and if it worked, great; if not, I would bottle feed. I went to a class prior to giving birth, and the one thing I remembered was that breastfeeding should NOT hurt. If it does, unlatch and relatch. At first, it would take numerous tries to get the latch right. But, I never had any issues with pain. I also used Gerber's NUK Gentle Moisturizing Balm, which is like a big chap stick. I liked it better than lansinoh as it was not so messy. Plus, it is not harmful to apply and then feed the baby. Anyway, initially nursing did not feel at all natural. But it worked out good for me--so easy and convenient. Our hospital offered a session with a lactation consultant which was very helpful. Good luck with whatever you decide!

Well I have read all your comments about the rude DIL. The mother that said "have patience"....I've been patient for 10 months now. My grandson was born last October. I welcomed my son's girlfriend in my home 2 years before she became pregnant (living with me). I think I have a great relationship with her personally. Unfortunately, I was not allowed to come to the hospital for the birth. I respected their wishes because they wanted it done this way. No one to be there so they could relax and bond with no company. Her mom did not respect this and showed up anyway and stressed her and my son so bad by being there (constantly talking, laughing, etc) all day that her labor became stressful. My son was so upset. Finally they booted her mom out. Again I'm saying, I respected the wishes. My DIL breastfeeds and she claims he won't take a bottle. I say she's wrong. A little bottle manipulation will take care of that. Mfg. companies do not make the nipples wide enough so not enough milk comes out. (I breastfed my son but pumped so my parents could feed and bond with their grandson--I had to have the nipples opened a little more so he would take it). I feel she doesn't want me and my husband to feed him, which is a bonding experience to grandparents. When I told her about this trick, my son was excited to try it because he too wants to feed his son. If I'm giving to her (money, gifts, going out to eat, etc.) she comes over and stays for a good while so I can play with him. If I don't have anything to offer, I never see her and she's always busy if I want to go over to her house. Her mother and family dont help them out or see the baby but once a month, but when there is holidays, her family gets first dibs on the visit. Me and my husband are always last and the baby is tired because they get to my house so late. His first birthday party is being planned around her mothers schedule, not the grandparents that have literally spent out thousands of dollars to help with their bills and baby items. (they have asked and I have offered). Yes, I am expected to help her out with buying decorations, food, and the rental space at the park but me and my husbands schedule didnt matter. I, too, have taken care of many babies and know what I'm doing. She won't let the baby out of her sight. She's always "right there" and seems she wants him to always want her or cry for her when he sees her so she can take him. I feel I haven't got a grandchild or bonded the way my parents bonded with my son. I've respected their wishes since she gave birth to him. I've only babysat 20 minutes a couple times. Although one time she and my son was doing some delivery work to make some extra cash and left him with us for 3 hours when he was 5 months. I insisted on them not to ride around that long with the baby in the carseat. They agreed reluctantly.....Believe me, by the time they got back, my grandson was not happy. He wanted food that I couldn't give. Did not have a bottle because i was not allowed to feed him. So needless to say, I dont watch him long periods like that anymore (with no bottle). She pumps but claims she doesn't pump enough. He feeds and within an hour he's hungry again and she feeds him again. Seems like she's breastfeeding constantly. Like I said, I feel I'm being used and I have to "pay" to see my grandson. When hes out of the baby stage, boy, people will be getting some good deals at my yard sale because everything is new since I see him maybe once a week, sometimes once every two weeks. I've tried everything. In my opinion she's too too too overprotective. I'd like for my grandson to grow to be a tough playing little boy not the opposite. I need that bonding experience. Yes, i have tried to talk to both of them and theres always excuses that doesnt make sense. I do want you to know I love my DIL very much. I just want to feel I've got a grandson and feel the baby stage experience... not blink and he's a grown boy. Any advise, please help. I've done everything I know of and now just being unemployed, I'm short on money. Makes me feel I'm being used. My husband is upset, too. HELP!!!!

You have two different issues going on: MIL and FIL criticizing your parenting, and your hubby's aunt who has dementia. As far as the in-laws go, I salute your deft handling of their criticisms and unsolicited advice. If it doesn't pass, you should have a discussion with your husband, asking him to be a filter between you and his parents. He needs to make it clear to his folks that they may not pick on you, nor bombard you with critiques. If something is bugging them, they need to bring it his attention. (I had a similar situation with my in-laws after I had kids. My husband had to draw some firm boundaries.) As to Aunt Dementia, I would ignore her comments, and encourage you to let your hubby indulge her bizarre photo requests. Be aware, dementia patients can go on that way for years. I had a much beloved grandmother who began to say crazy, totally unfiltered, and sometimes cruel comments. It took a while to adjust, but I know it wasn't her real feelings. I refused to let 30 years of memories of a loving relationship be tainted by her final years of dementia. Congratulations on your baby. Enjoy him, love him, love his daddy, and don't let the grands get you down. Times are changing, and grandparents will eventually realize the hazing they endured from their MIL and FIL need not be repeated with subsequent generations.

Marilyn, Garth and I were infatuated with each other at such a young age, that I think it was all about romance and we never truly developed a lasting friendship. Side story: I was a thin young thing. Before leaving for his junior prom, his father took photos of us. Sometimes photos reveal things we don't always see on our own. On Valentine's Day, Garth brought the photos to share with me. He said I looked pregnant in one photo. He and I had not been intimate and I was highly offended by the insinuation that I might have been intimate with another boy and broke up with him on the spot! Not long after that some of the girls in my gym class started asking if I was pregnant! My gym teacher took me into her office and gently asked me some questions. I told her I couldn't be pregnant, as I had not been intimate with any boy. She suggested that my mother should take me to a doctor for a checkup, which she did. After an exam and some tests, the doc determined that I had a fluid filled cyst attached to one of my ovaries, about the size of a grapefruit. Doc said there was no rush, but scheduled surgery for about a month later. The cyst kept growing and Mom took me back to the doctor and surgery was moved up. When Cyst and ovary were removed, the thing weighed nearly 8 pounds! My brother John ran into Garth at the shop he was working at and told him the cyst story. Garth came to visit me and I was rude to him because I was still hurt by the comment he had made. A few months later Garth began making weekly visits to my house. I always said something like, "You're here again?". He'd say, "I didn't come to see you. I came to see your mother." Sometimes I'd stay and sometimes I'd leave the house. He was sneaky. He made my mother love him. I had moved on and had a boyfriend. Garth stopped visiting about a year later. My boyfriend and I broke up. John ran into Garth and gave him that info. Garth started his weekly visits to my mom again, then finally, I thought he'd given up. Garth showed up a few months later to say goodbye. He'd become engaged. He had to go to a butcher shop and pick up something for his mother and asked if I would come along with him. That day we finally had the talk we should have had so long ago. I told him how he hurt my feelings and he apologized. That wasn't his intention, he was just making an observation. We both felt that we had finally made peace with each other. Two weeks later he came to see me again. We talked for a while and when he said goodbye, he leaned in to kiss me. I pulled back, reminded him that he was engaged, and he replied that he broke up with her because he still loved me. Boom! That really was my heart thudding. And the rest is history.