I'm very sorry to hear you and your husband are dealing with such a hard time. I don't know if it will help, but when my Dad was diagnosed with RA in 1962 one of the treatments they did for him was hot oil.

Maybe you could try just a heating pad, or one of those wax things, I can't think of the right word. Used for like spa treatments, you melt the big chunk of wax, then dip your hands or feet in, then put in the cloth/gloves that comes with it.

I'm thinking of and praying for you both. I truly hope he can find some relief.

do you have a shower? I'd buy a bath chair (about $35 at wal mart) and have him let the moving water do it's thing...be sure you get the kind with a back...btw they have a pretty good weight limit...

I also have a pulsing shower head (water pik brand)

are you near the beach? was just thnking about the sand, and the warmth of that as well..just be careful though of sun exposure! or a ymca pool? often they have heated pools now....water walking take the pressure off his legs...

Well, RA and OA are two separate diseases.
RA is an auto immune disease, it attacks connective tissue and joints. I call it an immune system with Alzheimer - it attacks any tissue.

OA is a wear and tear problem in the joint tissue.

i have both.

For OA, non stress bearing exercises and heat works.

I also have RA and when a flare hits with swelling, I find that ice packs take the heat and pain away.

I can understand his fears and tears so the best you can do for him is to be supportive. Take the time (I am sure you are) and listen to him. Offer comfort and the shoulder to cry on. Ask his friends to visit, even for short times or on the phone. Have your kids and GKids visit Grandpa. Keep family and freinds informed on how he is doing and be honest. You may be surprised how many will help.

And most of all, take care of your self. Be sure you have a support network also.

My wish for both of you is for his pain and fear to go away and he can become healthy again.

For anything else you can do for him, I think just what you've been doing, love him and support him. Even the strongest person has got to get discouraged occasionally, even frightened.

For the painful hands, all I can suggest is heat if he can't take anything pre surgery. I know some get relief from alternating heat and ice (DH for his knee, BIL for his back), ice to reduce swelling and inflammation and heat to soothe and increase blood flow. I don't do well with the ice myself, I want the comforting heat and keep microwave bags of flax seed for aches (OA base of my thumbs and my back). I've seen them made with rice, corn, other things but I like the fluid feel of flax seed in a cloth bag and the fact that it holds heat a good 45 minutes after microwave warming.

When my father had cancer, he was in a lot of pain. When in pain, one tends to get even more stressed and tense, more anxiety and less restorative sleep. There was a fellow in our city that did Therapeutic Touch and we noticed Dad was improved with less pain after these sessions. It is misnamed in a sense, because there isn't a lot of physical contact but it certainly is relaxing. I have my level 3 of TT but haven't done it in awhile. As a nurse, I was trained in my hospital to do it and it certainly worked with babies in pain. Look online, and read about it. It might be worth finding a professional in your area certified to do it and give it a try. I have had it done on myself and it does work.

Thinking of you both. It sure is not easy seeing someone you love in so much pain.

I wonder if a manicure place could do the paraffin wax thing on his hands for some relief. I would also go to a health foods store where they have lots of "home remedy" type things and talk to a clerk there.

When I have knee pain and swelling, I use Topricin, a homeopathic product that was highly recommended to me. I now have two of the large-size bottles, one for upstairs and one for downstairs. It gets great reviews on every website I've checked.

Best of luck with whatever you try.

Gosh I hope one of these remedies offer some relief. We have used the Wax Bath with success for RA in the hands. Think we got ours at Wallys and for months in the winter we kept it plugged in in the bathroom. We have a hand therapy clinic in town, and they really did help with my DH painful hands. I'd call and ask for suggestions if you have one. Good thoughts and prayers continuing.....Keep Your positive attitude up. We are here for you!

Have you thought about acupuncture ? My Son in Law is doing that since he had his major stroke and both he and my DD claim they can tell the difference.

Sandie -- Can you be strong for Jim by just listening to him? You can help him most by letting listening, not by telling him what he can and can't do. I know you are afraid, but your fears aren't helpful.

Doctors will always have one more thing to do. You can't count on them to know as well as the patient knows when to stop 'doing'. Jim knows what is best for Jim better than they do -- and better than you can. Can you support him while he considers his options and likely outcomes?

My father was on dialysis for ten years after his kidneys failed when he was in his seventies. The medicine he'd been prescribed for his heart problems caused the failure. Still more ills began to pile up. He eventually told his doctors he had thought it over, and that he was stopping the dialysis.

He told me he had had enough. He was beyond repair. He was weak and in pain. The family was in pain. He wanted to take some control over his immediate future. I didn't tell him to "stop fighting". I knew he had carefully considered his options. It was his life and his decision to make. I just wanted him to be at peace with it without adding complications.

Jim can decide to continue with more surgeries and therapies -- but let him have the option not to do that. He may decide he'd like to consider hospice services to help him decide. One can enroll in hospice support while continuing therapies.

I empathize as you lovingly support one along this road.

Not sure if you would want to try the naturopathic route but it worked wonders for me. Three years ago I couldn't close my hands into fists, nor turn a doorknob with one hand. Doing an elimination diet gave me greater relief within 10 days than years of medication ever did. I strict hardcore elimination diet is needed. I also did plenty of supplements - fish oil, probiotics, vitamin D, msm, glucosamine. I have been medication free for three years now for my arthritis and even some of the damage in my fingers has been reversed. I can make tight fists now, hold my own weight on a chin up bar, but full body weight on my wrists for pushups, etc. You can do this in conjunction with your medication and see results. It was the most demanding yet rewarding experience ever.

I get some relief from Arnicare.

I have both the gel, and the little pills, the arnica montana 6 c

It's homeopathic, and I got mine at Sproutz.

Moni

When I have an RA flare, Prednisone does the trick.
As to the OA in my hand it gradually got worse. got to the point where I couldn't make a fist or independently move my two middle fingers. Then, i noticed a hand therapy clinic nearby
Had Dr give me a referral, and they gave me daily exercises that worked . I now have full use....but if i skip the exercises, they start to stiffen up again.
And...if anyone comes after me....I can make a fist !

Thank all of you for your suggestions. I will discuss this with Jim and see what we can come up with.Again,thank you for your good thoughts and support.

Ice works well for us....and I have some topical gel (Biofreeze) that is helpful.
What has helped the most with my sore back, neck and knee is daily exercise. I do at least 30 minutes four or times a week and haven't needed any anti-inflammatory OTC meds.

I know it sounds strange ....but wd 40 really does work for arthritis .... it works for a lot of other things too.

Sandie, I've been thinking of you and your husband for a couple days now. Seems like he has his own health issues and someone else's too. Just doesn't seem fair, does it? Hope the surgery went well. Maybe you posted somewhere else, I don't know.

Like another poster here, I use Topricin on my arthritic foot. I spend some time massaging it into the whole foot. The foot feels better after this, but I've wondered if it's really the ingredients or the massage of joints, arch, etc. which helps. You could try that for his poor hands.

I also use Capzacin, but I don't think I would recommend it because it burns so much, and I'm not kidding. If by any chance you try it, be EXTREMELY careful and follow directions without fail. It could be tried on just a tiny 1" spot. Might even be wise to ask doc about this one.

Thinking of you and hoping all goes as well as can be expected.

Cold therapy is a natural pain reducer. It naturally reduces inflammation and swelling which in turn will reduce the pain. Anti-inflammatories mask the pain but don't help heal very well. A standard part of therapy would be to stimulate blood flow, because the more we promote blood flow,
the faster we will heal. Increasing blood flow and attracting nutrient rich blood to the area helps alleviate arthritis symptoms.

Here is a link that might be useful: arthritis treatment

phobe....using WD-40 reminds me of Dorothy oiling the Tin Man! Lol. It is so greasy and runny I could see it making a big mess.