Those Annoying Chistmas Brag Letters!!! ugh..
bulldinkie
21 years ago
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KerryClem
21 years agobugs_niagara_com
21 years agoRelated Discussions
Does anyone write a family letter?
Comments (35)I am a secret tacky-Christmas-letter lover. When we get one where all the writer does is brag, I laugh and find it entertaining. Also feel a little pity for the poor souls who are in such denial of the real world. I really do enjoy hearing about people's lives. Some friends of my husband (people I have never met) send letters and now I feel I know them personally. We started writing one about 6 years ago when we had a disaster home problem (broke in half, condemned. sorry wrong forum) and everyone wanted to know every year how it, and the law suit was progressing. I got so tired of writing all the details over and over (especially because I have arthritis in my hands) so I just typed it all up, added a little info on our work, told about the dog's activities and sent it on. The first year, I changed the name at top and added a personalized paragraph, but since I print it out at work (sshhh) and use fancy Hallmark paper, it was taking up a lot of time. So now I do the tacky-Christmas-form-letter and hand write a small personal note. This way I can go in to work early one day and run them off before anyone knows. I absolutely hate getting a card from someone with just their names written on it. Even worse is the name stamped on it with my name and address typed on a computer label. I feel like I am just a nuisance that people feel need to be taken care of and do it in the quickest, less painful way possible. I am also very busy but start at Halloween and address just 1 or 2 a day. It's easier to add a personalized note when that person is the only one I need to think of that day....See Morethose damn pants!!! ~again~
Comments (48)DH and BM had mediation today. SD has asked him three time is she was going... she wasn't even supposed to know about it. DH said it went fairly well. The mediator started to give him crap over the pants... (my jaw hit the floor when I heard that!) but I guess BM wrote that DH intentionally threw away the pants BECAUSE she bought them. He told them they were too small and didn't fit her, we buy her most of her clothes and he thought it was petty to fight over a pair of pants... then said we had to throw away her pants from last weekend because they came back ripped. BM jumped up and asked him if he was accusing her and he told her no, but it IS in your nature to do something like that and it might be retaliatory because she angry about the other pants. He basically said SD goes through clothes and we buy new ones every few months as she grows, seasons change, etc. Other than that, BM lied her ass off. She said SD was injured when we took her on a serve at 10pm. We never took her to do a serve at 10pm. I went to serve a subpoena on a guy that was expecting it... it was scheduled so no chance for conflict and we were coming home around 8pm when our window broke out on the side of the car. SD was sitting behind the driver seat and the passenger window shattered. We think it was a rock.. maybe kids using a slingshot because we were passing a ball field when it happened. It had nothing to do with being on a serve, we could have been on our way to dinner. She said SD was cut up from the broken glass. It scared her (it scared ALL of us) but no glass got on her or cut her. We stopped at a firehouse to call 911 and waited for the Sheriff to make a report for our insurance. While we were waiting, DH took pictures of SD in front of the fire house for her school project on CA. She was wearing her coat (yet BM said it cut up her arms) and smiling (yet BM said she was hurt & terrified). That was the only other thing DH had to really explain but BM tried to explain why her other DD does not live with her, why she has waited 2 years if this was 'temporary' and then BM told the mediator that SD absolutely wants to live with her. That got the mediator's attention and she asked BM "How do YOU know THAT?" Well, it was in the paperwork handed out before mediation that the child should NEVER be asked where they want to live because no child should EVER have to choose between their parents. I guess BM didn't read it or didn't think it applied to HER! BM also lied when DH said he believes she only filed for custody because BM doesn't want to pay support. He said it is a coincidence that she was served shortly before she filed... BM said she filed two weeks before she got served by DCSS. lol, the mediator can easily check that out in the court case because DCSS served her on 4/13 and BM filed for custody on 4/16. I really hope her lies bring her down! I guess the mediator wanted to see SD so when they left mediation, they went into the clerks office & I went in with DH so they could schedule it. The mediator looked a little annoyed and BM was right there next to her. Then the mediator said when SD comes in, there is no parental involvement at all so it does not matter who brings her in. DH asked if I can bring her in so he didn't have to miss work and BM volunteered to pick her up from school & bring her in. The mediator again said it didn't matter who brings her. So, they set it up for 4pm after school and I said (and it just came out without thinking) that she can pick her up from the house at 3:30. BM practically snarled at me "WHY?" and I said so she can do her homework since she gets out of school at 2:20 and BM nearly bit my head off.. snapping at me that SHE can help HER daughter with homework. I said fine. The mediator said "there will be none of that in here!" So, in hindsight I should have said nothing. Of course, it shows the mediator that BM really has a huge problem with me. I guess at one point, DH said I am available to talk to her too if she needs to and BM jumped in and said "there's no need for that" or something like that.. basically saying the mediator does not need to talk to me at all. The mediator jumped on BM saying she'll talk to whoever she wants in order to make a recommendation but I am guessing BM did not impress the mediator. BM stormed off down the street and when we were getting on the freeway, BM got behind us and then drove around us really fast and sped off. She was pissed. She does not like to be called on her lies and she also told the mediator she had an email where DH agreed she was to have SD on her birthday from 9-6, not 8-8. Well, she is supposed to bring that back when they see the mediator the week after SD sees her. It doesn't exist. They did not email each other about her birthday, it was discussed when we picked up SD. Besides, even if it WAS 6pm... she left SD at 4pm to go back to her BF and left SD with grandma! DUH! She is also supposed to bring letters she says SD has written about how terrible I am to her and how she doesn't like me. When BM told the mediator how SD and I don't get along, DH presented a stack of letters & cards SD has made me over the last two years. She gave me one yesterday that said "Happy early Mother's Day". I can only imagine she is going to make SD write letters to 'prove' what she says is true. If she does, I can't believe she thinks the mediator is going to buy that! She is something else!!!...See MoreChild Support????
Comments (100)Praising someone , and acknowledging their accomplishment, isnt quite the same as offering a monetary reward in advance, for every "a" they bring home. I think its very important to encourage people of all ages by commenting on the good things that they do. I Think that way too often we focus on the bad things and ignore the good things. Psychologists recommend a five to one ration...five positive notices for one negative. Most parents fail to do that. THe reason I do not give monetary things for a good report card is simple. I cant set the standard in advance without humiliating the child who doesnt get grades at the same level. Its not about the A, or B, or D. Its about whether or not the kid tried, whether or not they put their own effort into it, and whether they stuck to it. REwarding for an A means nothing. When I was a student, I dont think I ever got less than an A in anything, except perhaps art. I was an exceptional student. My brother was lucky to scrape by with a C. My grandparents rewarded by purchasing things for me when I would get my report, and then admonishing my brother, see, Kathline got a new tape player because she did great on her report card. My brother resented the hell out of that, because firstly, I didnt have to work for those "a" grades; they came naturally, and b) he had to sweat just to get a c grade. My accomplishments were bragging material, his were an embarassment. IT was unfair,and damaging to my brother in the long run. Heck, it was even damaging to me, since I got rewarded for something that cost me very little work. Which is why I dont reward for report cards in my home, although no one could ever accuse me of not being positive with my kids. THe negatives in our household are extremely rare....See MoreI'm tired of my Ex and his drama llama
Comments (21)Yes she has to call stepmom Mom. She does it so she won't get into trouble. She doesn't like it because it's awkward to her. Dad and I divorced when she was 4. Dad met stepmom during seperation. Dd met stepmom right after divorce. Dd called stepmom by her first name for the next 4 years but then all of a sudden, she has to start calling her Mom just in the past 8 months. It's so weird. Oh Dd asked me a weird question today. I had a lightbulb go off in my head and I wanted to tell y'all. She just out of the blue said, I think it's so weird that my dad has to pay you money but you have a car and he doesn't. I just paused for a minute not sure how to answer because I have never told Dd about child support. So I asked her to explain her concern further because I wasn't understanding her point. She said you and Stepdad work, Dad works but he makes more money than both of you and you still have a nicer car than he does, he doesn't even have his own car.. So many thoughts went through my head and later, my Dh and I brought it up to each other and we laughed that both of us had the same thoughts... 'well if stepmom would get a job then maybe your daddy could buy himself a new car! AND SM drives a car that cost what mine and DHs cars combined cost... But alas that wasn't my response. I just told her yes Dad pays what is called child support and it's court ordered. You live more time with me and so the state says that both parents have to equally provide for their kids and that means he gives us money to help pay for your clothes, shoes, toothpaste, roofing, heat, water, etc. AND daddy doesn't have a car of his own because he has a vehicle that is provided for him by his boss and so he doesn't need one of his own, right? She said OH that would be so silly for him to have two cars. Every morning he would have to flip a coin to see which one to drive! Why does this jerk think he has to share every detail with our daughter?? She does not need to know the ins and outs of family court... I do wish there was a way to prove all of this and put his butt back on supervised visits where he belongs!...See Moretenyr68_hotmail_com
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