Greg, Thanks for the well wishes. I do feel like I have been thru quite a bit, but I just keep telling myself "There's always someone out there who has it far worse than me." I try to always have that attitude. After both surgeries I realized how much more difficult my life could be if I permanently lost the use of my legs or my back. I'll tell ya what, I have my good days and my bad days but in general I try to keep myself in a positive mood. I see that you also like the plumeria forums on Face Book! It was nice to be able to put a face with a name. I especially like being able to see all your plumeria pictures there. I need to invest in a good camera so I can take the same kind of pictures! Anyhow, when I do find myself having days when I am in a lot of pain, I like to go to Face Book(and also here!) so I can see all the great plumeria pictures. They really do cheer me up a lot. Hi Qaguy, I will be contacting you soon. I am trying to get my hands on as many cuttings as I can right now. Reason being, they give me something to enjoy and to look forward to! I really enjoy watching cuttings throw out there first roots, leaves, inflos, and BUDS! Hi Mona, The way I see it right now is that ANY day is a good day as long as I am not a patient in the hospital that is!! Hi Irun, LOL, at least there is someone who knows how I feel! I am so glad to be off of the steroids! I was getting them 3 times a day, everyday I was there! Tomorrow I have to be at my first follow up. I have mixed emotions in regards to this appointment. In one hand, I know that there going to remove all 75 staples, and that right there will make me feel much better. The reason I don't want to go is because the nuerosurgeon's office is 45 minutes away and I have to ride in a car up there and back, not including the wait in his waiting room, and then the exam room! You know it doesn't matter if you have had major back surgery or not, and in all fairness, there could be a dozen other patients waiting to be seen, and there appointment could also be a follow up after there surgery. I will try and post after my surgery so you all have some kind of idea as to what is going on. Take care, Andrew

Trin, Sending good thoughts and prayers for her. I went through the lumpectomy and radiation 6 1/2 years ago, so I hope that she will be as fortunate. The one thing that helped me was following the diet they gave me after the surgery. It said to have lots of good quality protein - eggs, chicken, turkey. I can't remember what else. The diet helped me heal quickly. I'm sure that they will give her good advice. Another thing that helped me is that I started swimming when the surgeon said I could. Swimming slowly helped to stretch the chest and arm muscles.

My family was dealing with this same problem last fall. It isn't easy. My dad was pretty organized and had already given a lot of furniture and china/silver to various children. A lot of what was left in the house, that he was using, was earmarked for certain children. However, his eight kids are scattered across the US and at the time of his death one was serving overseas and his wife and baby had gone to yet another country to be with her family while he was away. Things got complicated. We rented a storage area. We all got together shortly after the funeral and marked all the furniture that was to go into storage and all other furniture that people wanted to take right away. We rented a van and moved everything into storage in one day. Everything else, each individual was responsible for getting it home. Dad's estate is paying for the storage area for one year. After that, people have to either toss/donate the stuff or get it home somehow. We sorted out the really important papers that we would need right away. We boxed up the rest, labeled the boxes and put them in storage. We deliberately chose a storage facility near the closest sibling. My sister and I are now going through the papers at the rate of a box a month. One of my brothers wants all Dad's military papers, so we can just send those off to him as we come across them. For some of the smaller stuff, china, silver, pictures, etc. one of my sisters took a lot of it home with her. She sent out emails listing the stuff to see if anyone wanted it. If someone claimed it, she set it aside for them to come and get it or for them to send money to ship it. The remainder got donated. This process took about 4 or 5 months. This would be the sentimental stuff that you are talking about--who knew that my brother would want Dad's desk chair or my sister really loved the picture that hung over Dad's bookcase? We contacted a couple of charities to see if they wanted any of the furniture, dishes, linens. One charity took several things, the other only 4 chairs. After that, we checked with some estate sale places, but they said we didn't have enough good quality stuff to hold a sale. Once everything we wanted was out of the house, we rented a dumpster and tossed a lot of stuff. No one really wants 40 year old mattresses, love seats with missing legs, kitchen tables that sag in the middle. Two of my siblings were really hurt that we threw away some of the furniture from the house. They still saw it through eyes of love. It was old, battered, falling apart. I finally told them they were free to take it home, sell it or find someone else to take it, but I was through with it. Oddly, they didn't want to take it home themselves, nor were they roused enough to find someone else to take it. It helps a lot if you have someone with you when you go through the things. A little moral support; a little voice of reason when you get carried away and want to save everything.

Lucy, Sylvia is exactly right..FDHs son is probably embarrassed, and angry if he was disiplined for what he did with the fist raising, but what are your expectations when you marry, FSS has to visit his dad at grandmas ? He will have to come to your home eventually, FDH needs to mend these fences between you and your sons and his son, not run off to grandmas...Also does FDH want Ex at the family functions? Why doesnt he tell her, stopping in is OK, but dont wear out your welcome, this is MY family, not yours... I have stopped at Exs family wakes usually before the home opens, to drop a card and sign the book, that way they know I cared enough to come, but didnt stick around to cause drama...I have had major problems with DH s ex coming to funerals, geez, I thought she d outlast the grieving spouse, as far as her staying power. DH and I just ignore her. But as far as sons needing support, DH was in the hospital, FSDIL asked if I called Ex to come, I was incredulous!!!!DH didnt want her there, but she was more than welcome to sit in the parking lot and give them hugs every half hour or so, if she chose to...Good luck with thse beauties, I feel your pain....