time takes care of a lot of things like this, so even when some sort of treatment seems to work, it might be just because the child has matured a little. I think your idea of getting him to laugh at the situation is a good one. And you are right as rain...getting tired makes, it much much worse. You can just try to keep it from being part of his daily thing.

I think it's habit forming behavior. Does he need a little snack? some extra fruit juice? Just something to give him a little extra spurt of energy might make a difference. Of course, if he is whining for a snack and it's almost dinner time, you don't want to cater to that whine.

It's too bad when someone manages to grow up with whining as part of their personality. It happens. Punishment just doesn't seem to work.

Hang in there...anything you try might work.. for a while. But if you can get him to laugh you have gotten one step ahead of the problem.

Only one of mine did this. He would start late in the afternoon just as I was trying to start the evening meal. I found that the best thing with him was to just sit down on the floor with him in my lap and hug and sing to him for a minute or two. Then he would just rest a little, calm down and then get up and go about his business. It took a little time, but in the long run, it was easier to do it and get it over with. Funny thing, HIS son did the same thing. His mother never caught on that this is what he needed. When ever I was over at the house, I would sit down on the floor, gather him up, and in just a little while, he would be OK again.

I have a whiner too. Oh man is it annoying! It seems like I've tried everything to no avail. There is a book at the library called 'stop the whining' (I think..or something similar to that). I have not read it yet so I don't know if it has effective tips or not. Something tells me though that some of this is just a stage that will pass over time. I don't think he'll be getting many dates in high school if he keeps this up!

Here's what I've heard. If he asks for something in a whining voice make him wait five minutes (which is an eternitiy for a kid) and then he can try and ask again the proper way (in a big boy voice.) Everytime he asks in a whining voice have him wait to get what he wants and eventually he'll catch on - hopefully!

'I don't hear you.' Say that kind of thing with utter calm. Don't respond to or mention whining at that point. Give him a chance to self-correct. 3 1/2 year olds are not very sophisticated and can have behavior habits and patterns like anyone else. He may not 'get' what you mean, so if you get more whining you may have to clarify. Again, with utter calm and no animation, this time try 'We don't speak like that, ask nicely.' Basically tailor the message to your needs. It is mainly essential to be utterly consistent once you decide to not hear whining. He has to get used to this new reality _as well as_ change his habitual pattern. There will be some 'testing' but that's a good thing.

Be clear about what you want. Things that can interfere with success in this area are inadvertent rewards or intermittant reinforcements. He learns that if he whines 'enough' it turns into a game and you act silly and make him laugh and he feels better (everyone does with a good laugh). You can replace that pattern with one where, when he speaks well he gets not only a more timely response to his requests but also a hug (or you could act silly then, because he probably really likes that and if it gives you both a laugh then you both will feel better).

It's hard because even though he's young, 'you' cannot stop his whining. He has to stop his whining. You can do things that will encourage it, and you might feel somehow responsible for it (his behavior) but it is not yours to control. You can change your behavior and maintain consistency so that his behavior will then change.

When DS whines incessantly, I give him a time out on the stairs with some saltine crackers. When he's finished, he knows he can come downstairs and try again, nicely. It works well for us, it's an established system, and sometimes just a few crackers will improve his blood sugar and temperment immensely.

Simply ignore whatever they are saying if they whine. Tell them you do not understand that way of talking and continue to ignore until the kid speaks up.

I actually CAN'T understand my kid when he whines. And sometimes when he's talking "cute." I say "open your mouth when you talk." and of course I exaggeratedly open my mouth as I say it. "use a big round mouth" (ever try to whine w/ a round mouth? doesn't work)

And then if he's still whining, I can't understand him. Even if I wanted to.

But I'm lucky, he doesn't whine a lot. Just a little, now and then.

And I work w/ a grown-up whiner, so it's not a bad idea to try to eliminate it now.

If it is a moody whine (hunger, tired), we do the big girl voice thing and start listing the problems and what we can do about them. If it is a spoiled whine, I just mimic her whining about how mommy wants a new car, it makes her crazy and the whining stops!!

We had a wine bottle and everytime the whining started I'd say "wine belongs in a bottle not in a voice" and we'd pretend to put the whining voice in the bottle and cork it.
Keeping a sense of humor and not over reacting really seemed to help. Sue.

Lately, the whining seems to be directly related to either needing a nap, or hungry.

Yesterday, the whining was a 7.5 on the richter scale. I dismissed nap-neediness because she had gotten a full nights sleep. But I put her in my lap and she fell asleep on my shoulder. (guys, she's 4, she NEVER does this any more). I was shocked but I think when they are going thru a growth spurt, or for whatever mysterious reason, sometimes they need an extra snooze). She only napped for 40 minutes - a deep snooze, and then she was completely ok the rest of the day.

So next time the whine rears it's ugly head, I'm going to check the tummy first, and the nap second.

Has he seen a dentist? My oldest DS drove us nuts between 2 1/2 and 3 with the whining - I started to worry he had emotional problems because he whined so much. We listened to the peditrician, who said he should have his first dentist appt at age 3 - so we took him to the dentist right after his 3rd birthday. The poor boy had 2 abcessed molars. DS was a premie and the enamel didn't form on his teeth fully, so even with thorough brushing, he got terrible cavaties. The dentist did 2 root canals and most of the whining stopped. The poor dear was trying to tell us he was in pain!!!

By the way, I took my other 2 younger sons to the dentist at age 18 months for their first check-up. I wish I'd been more agressive with the first one!

If you can come up with a way to stop whining, you will win the love and adoration of millions of parents worldwide. I'd be first in line to bow to you. LOL