I s'pose I could buy him a new one!

Here is a link that might be useful: book w/

For 2 years my daughter asked me where her Easy Bake Oven was and I said, "I don't know!" I lied. I distinctively remember giving it to Goodwill. And yes, I do feel badly about it. Sort of. And yet I still haven't forgiven my own mother for getting rid of my guitar while I was in college. She never even asked me. One day I asked her for it and she casually said she gave it away. I'm still mad!

Sheryl

I've done this quite a few times, both to my kids and my husband :\.

My husband still needles me because I threw out a cup. Yes, a cup. It was a large red plastic one from Pizza Hut. Don't know how he/we got it but in one of my kitchen declutterings I got rid of it. Turns out he considered that *his* special cup to use at family gatherings because not only was it nice and large but he always knew which one belonged to him (my large extended family is bad about using tons of cups/glasses and there are always many half-full dead soldiers littering the patio where we gather).

I actually went to Pizza Hut to try to buy another one for him. Couldn't get it, they said they hadn't used em in years. I've bought some other cups but he won't be consoled.

I admit that one was a pang, especially because my husband is a jewel about never, ever throwing away anything of mine. He even will uncomplainingly work around enormous piles of clutter on our mutual desk area, and never say a word.

My kids occasionally ask for some item that is long gone and I try to be honest. Generally it's something that had been sitting forgotten for YEARS so I really don't get too bent out of shape about it. That's life.

A friend of mine wistfully remarked that she regretted giving her youngest son's talking Buzz Lightyear doll away. You just never know, except you know that they won't miss at least 90% of what gets tossed. It's that other 10% that keeps the guilt-machine running! At least four years ago, I gave one of my daugher's dolls to the Salvation Army (I'm typing fast b/c she's in the other room). And she still asks about that doll several times a year. She believes it's lost. More frequently four years ago, but still three or four times a year now. I feel terrible about it, but this girl is such a pack rat that something had to go. Now, I'm really trying to buy far less for my children. My oldest daughters have American Girl dolls and while I usually give each daughter the same mix of dolls (the younger daughters are expecting their A.G. dolls this year), I dread plunking down $100 for these dolls, spending more to dress the dolls than I do to dress myself, and then having it sit on the shelf almost all of the time. I need to speak to them soon and talk about alternatives (they will want a cat). What I really want to do is give the oldest girls dolls away and be done with American Girl dolls for good. Great books, great dolls, but I think they feed into the consumer-frenzy collect-it-all mindset, which is obviously a great money maker for that company.

My mother sold my light blue pedal car in a garage sale when I was in the 6th grade. I love my mother dearly but I've never forgiven her for that!

My own children complain that I either give away or sell their toys too. The problem is that they have sooo much and much of it is never played with.

I agree w/cup about the American Girl dolls - my own daughter has two dolls and a trunk full of very expensive clothes. I would love to have the money spent on those wardrobes! We will likely put them away for my future granddaughters, but right now (at age 12) she's not quite ready to part with them. I give her another 6 months and they will be whisked away to the attic to join Barbie and her friends.

My mother and father made me take a favorite doll to goodwill. I have never forgiven them for it. It was my big baby. GOodwill most likely threw it away as ti was a well loved, well traveled doll. Glad I'm not the only one that feels this way.

About the hedgehog- I'd replace it.

I do that with my kids. I have gotten rid of things only to find out that was a mistake. It rarely happens but when it does I try to replace it. I figure it is my mistake, I have to pay for it. I don't make my kid pay for my over excited tossing. OF course, I don't replace it right away either, I replace it when they have asked for several times and looked for several times.

Ginger

I, too, understand about the American Girl thing. My daughter has a trunk of beautiful clothes for her AG dolls, all purchased from her grandmother. I will *never* be the one to give any of this away or she will be posting one day about how she can't forgive ME!

As for getting rid of husband's stuff...this is sort of along the same lines. My husband loves car races and has a favorite tee shirt he wears only when he attends a race. It's sponsored by Marlboro. Well, one day a telemarketer called and I picked up the phone (before caller I.D.!) and they wanted to do a survey on what kinds of cigarettes my husband smokes. Thoroughly disgusted, I exclaimed, "My husband has NEVER smoked." End of discussion. I was so proud of the fact that I ended THOSE phone calls. Awhile later my husband wondered why Marlboro wasn't sending him free racing tee-shirts and stuff anymore. Somehow we got on the conversation about that phone call and how I couldn't believe they thought he smoked. My husband looked at me with this incredulous look and said, "You didn't tell them I don't smoke, did you?" Yep. He was so upset and STILL is. Now they won't send him anything because they know the truth and he is still mad about it! So he has that one racing shirt that has little holes starting in the neckline but he refuses to part with it. And I definitely will *not* be the one to give away, considering I'm already in the doghouse about the other stuff!

Sheryl

I think I'd buy a new one.

I've lost things I wanted to keep because someone else didn't think I needed them. The most recent have been irreplaceable photos and items from my childhood that were stuck out in a barn after my dad remarried. Yes, it burns.

I'm trying not to do that to my kids, but it's hard sometimes figuring out what's important. The kids got a ton of stuff for Christmas from the relatives. The toy boxes were already full. Since the toys get packed up for the drive home within a few hours after they get opened, I'm giving away new toys before the kids get attached. Dd got another rocking toy for Christmas from mil. It was probably a $25 toy. It has a new home with a little 2 mo boy. Some stuff is still in the boxes.

I'm working very hard on talking the almost 5 yo into selling some of his less favored toys at a garage sale. At least he'd get money for his loss and he'd get to choose what stays and what goes. On the other hand, I also need to buy either shelves or storage bins for his room so I can teach him to organize what he has before we downsize the treasures.

cupofkindness, a cat will run you at least a hundred bucks a year. For fifteen or twenty years.

Buy the dolls. LOL

I can relate. A few years ago I gave a stuffed monkey named "George" to Goodwill. He had these ears that would spin when you pushed his stomach . . . charming, huh?! Anyway, I gave it away, thinking the kids never will miss him. Well, like a dummy I forgot and then took the kids "junking" at goodwill a couple weeks later. They saw "George" and I was busted. Since he still had syrup stains (apparently George enjoyed French Toast!) it was hard to deny it was ours. I ended up having to buy George back. He sits smuggly in my youngest son's closet, having not been touched for ages, but knowing I won't risk throwing him out again! LOL!

Brenda

Brenda:

That is one of the funniest stories I've ever read on the forum! Simply hilarious!

~C

Brenda, that is too funny! The kids don't go to Goodwill with me anymore, but it's still weird for me when I see my own stuff in there - and I'm always curious how much they are selling it for.

Sheryl

I try to be careful what I toss--I'm normally a big conservative. That's why I'm not absolutely certain that I got rid of him. I need to get downstairs and look again, then I'll know.

I used to believe that it was possible to just lose stuff--stuffed animals, toys, etc. Then, as a young adult out on my own, I realized that I was always *finding* stuff that I thought I'd lost--there it was, in a corner of the room, the bottom of the closet, whatever. I remember being amazing that I could actually *find* stuff.

It wasn't until the first time that I tossed something (some stupid McDonald's toy, or something) and decided "I'll just tell them it got lost" that I realized what my mom had done. I didn't lose stuff--she threw it out bcs it was on the floor, junky, whatever.

It really changed how I think of myself. As a kid and a teenager, I thought I was the sort of person who just lost stuff. Who couldn't keep things. Who must have accidentally thrown something away, bcs it sure wasn't around!

It wasn't until I had lived on my own for several years that I changed my definition to someone who never throws out stuff I need, who can always find it if I look through those three piles.

I've made a resolution to myself that I hope will work for me, and that I hope to make work for my kids. I have so much crap in my parents' attic, and I have declared that I will remove it ALL when we finally move into our house. I have a large trunk from my summer camp days, and I vow to keep from childhood only what fits into it. Everything else has to go. And as I find I accumulate new keepsakes over my lifetime, they also have to fit - something will have to get weeded out to make room.

Things that will be exempt from this is photos - ONLY if I remove them from the trunk and into albums, and my very large stuffed dog (once bigger than I).

I fantasize about telling my child - you can keep whatever you can put away (in your room). If you need help, let me know. Whatever you can't find a place for has to go!