Sometimes we have to experience things that are so hard to bear. Try to look at this experience as a gift and benefit from it. You've been blessed to have her this long, You are blessed to be able to comfort her in any way by your presence. You are able bodied enough to endure this. You have the inner strength and you're giving her strength to continue on her journey. You'll have the peace of mind knowing that you've been a good loving daughter and you'll go on without her but a better person because of the experience. Sending prayers and hugs.

Try to enjoy the time you have left with your mother. I went through this type of thing for the last 11 months of my father's life. It is not easy.

I pray that He supports you and gives you peace.

Shirley

Also sending thoughts and prayers your way.

Beautifully said, Yayagal.

Life does suck sometimes. Permanent separation is very difficult, I empathize with your pain and distress.

I know it is hard to do. I went through this with my mom and I know it will be difficult, especially the final days. I hope you will be able to be with her, giving her the love and comfort she needs. My thoughts and prayers are with you both.

((((((((enjoying spring))))))) I have no words, except I agree with what has been said. Peace and deep comfort for you all.

-Robin

I have this ahead of me too, though I don't know just when yet. I'm so sorry for your suffering and hope you can find the strength to bear it. Just holding your mother's hand must be very helpful for her--I take it she is in the hospital? Yaya, you have a wonderful way with words.

I'm so sorry. We are never ready to say goodbye to our parents, no matter their age or ours.

My mom is 96 and doing great. Last night I was at her house and while sitting at the kitchen table, I looked across at her and thought "remember this".

Many hugs to you and your mother.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Last June I had to say goodbye to my mother after many years being her caregiver. She was only 78. Just be with her. Read to her. Hold her hand. You'll never regret it.

I can imagine how hard this is for you. My mother died so quickly. I talked on the phone to her twice that morning and at noon she was gone. Losing a mother is hard. Hugs to you.

I sympathize with what you're going through. My mom was in the hospital the last 8 months of her life and it was awful.

She was my best friend and we talked daily, more than once. I still want to call her and talk to her, and it's been 2 years.

No matter how old we get, we'll always miss our mom.

Sending hugs your way. Although incredibly difficult to experience, I was so thankful that I could be there for and with my mother. Will keep both of you in my prayers as you take this journey.

I am sorry to see you have to go through this too. I watched my Mom pass away at home after a long journey with Alzheimer's and then pancreatic cancer. Then my sister who passed away 2 years ago. I actually went to call her on the phone the other day then remembered she wasn't here anymore. I choked up because you forget they aren't here. You will still be able to talk to your Mom - I still do.

Enjoy what time you have left, you will feel the love from your Mom now and then even after she passes. Hugs

Thinking of you and your Mom

Sending prayers to all of you.

I had to watch my precious husband die, a day at a time, from pancreatic cancer - you are right - it is one of the most difficult trials to be a part of.

I am so sorry and I can sympathize, my mother is 93 also and in failing health and I'm sure that one day soon I'll be in your shoes. I know how I'll feel, sick to my stomach from all the emotion and unable to eat or sleep.... I hope you are coping better than I will but I am so sorry that you having to go thru this, no matter how you deal with it. It's just damned hard and it sucks.

Our moms are so special and it's going to be very hard to lose her/them. So very sorry....

((((((Enjoying spring))))))
I'm so sorry for your pain

The finality of impending death is hard to face. When death comes, it is even worse, and you are already worn out from the preceding struggle. It will take TIME to finally accept the loss of someone so much a part of yourself -- and go on among the living without being pulled back.

I was 35 when my mother was diagnosed with 'a slow-developing blood disorder' that turned out to be a leukemia, It leached away her career and her life until her year-long final decline when was 37. She was an only child. I am an only child. My father left us when I was very small. We were all we had.

All you can do is keep on loving, now and after your mother is gone. The collective 'shoulder' of the KT is here for you.

Seven years ago today I lost my Mother. I sat with her in hospice for 2 weeks and held her hand when she could no longer speak but we had some good conversations before that. even when I thought she could not hear or understand me, we had a short pillow fight when she thought I was ignoring her as I spoke with one of the aides!

Hug her, kiss her, hold her hand. Talk to her and let her know how much you love her. Share old memories. Help make her comfortable as she probably did for you when you were her baby.

It is okay to let her know you will miss her forever but that it is okay to leave.

I know how much you hate this. I wish I could hold my Mom's hand and give her kisses. You can do this...because you love her.

And for those of you that still have Mommies, call or hug them today please.

Thank you for all your support, I truly appreciate it.

It is just so hard to let go of someone who has been such a big part of your life for so many years. Like so many of you my Mother and I have always been really close, always chatting and discussing things. I am so going to miss that.

So sorry. Sending prayers for you and your mom.

This is one of the times in life, I think, when we need to live in the moment.

I hope that you can spend time with your Mom, holding her hand , and talking, reliving many of the good times in your lives together. It may be somewhat hurtful, but I hope that you can rejoice in them, as well. As several have said, you'll be glad that you did, later. I'm sure that you'll find funny parts of your lives together, as well, and there'll be some laughter as part of the mix.

Many have said that they don't like visiting a funeral home, as it's so depressing ... but many find that there's much laughter, there, as well, as friends recount stories, especially funny ones, of experiences that they've had with the dear departed one

When we love much ...

... the pain at parting is that much stronger ... but it comes with the territory: we wouldn't love less in order to reduce the resulting pain.

I hope that you have family and face-to-face friends to help you find your way through this ... and your many friends here will be happy to interact, whenever you feel like coming, both now and after your Mom sets out on the next part of her journey.

((((((enjoyingspring ... and Mom ... and family and loved ones))))))

ole joyful

You have been so lucky and so blessed to not only have your mother at age 93, but to have such a wonderful relationship with her. ((((((enjoying spring)))))).

I'm so sorry.

To the great deal of good & heartfelt advice I can only say amen.

holding both of you, & all the kind posters who shared their stories, in my thoughts & in my heart.

So sorry for you going through that. Both my parents died YOUNG and unexpectedly. There was no preparing myself (or them!). Cherish these last days, even though they are so very painful.

May this time that you have together be a blessing for both of you, enjoying spring. And for others involved, as well.

Sending good hopes and thoughts, and offering some prayers on behalf of all of you.

((((((enjoying spring))))))

old joyful

Difficult? YES.

Hugs, kind thoughts, and most of all, prayers for you and your Mother. Many wise words have already been posted, and I agree with them. No words can truly ease your pain, but hopefully, the knowledge that so many people are thinking about you will be helpful.

I know and feel your pain. I lost my Mother about 23 years ago. She was the same age as I am now. I lost my Dad 6 years ago and my sister and two brothers in 2011 and 2012. I am the only one left of my family. I am just grateful that I was there with them in their last days. I still talk to all of them and sometimes even wish I could call my Mom. Be grateful that you have this time with her. Bless you and your Mom. You are in the thoughts and prayers of your KT Friends. Take care of yourself.

I am so sorry. I know what you mean. I did the same with Dad a year ago. You are both in my prayers.

Tami

I'm so sorry. Losing your mother is so hard, especially when you're close. It's such a blessing that you've had her for this long.

My Mother is still in hospital, fading a little each day. She has a strong will to live but her heart is very weak.

Thank you for all your support, it really does help.

Judy

Joyfulguy the sentiment below was so beautiful. thank you

When we love much ...

... the pain at parting is that much stronger ... but it comes with the territory: we wouldn't love less in order to reduce the resulting pain.

I'm sorry for your heartache. At the same time, I know you don't want her to suffer anymore.

Consider these words excerpted from the writings of Rumi: "Death has nothing to do with going away. The sun sets and the moon sets, but they're not gone."

Peace.

I'm sorry, enjoying. I watched my mom and then my Dad (25 years later). Mom had lung cancer, it was a very ugly painful death. No one was with her in the middle of the night when she finally slipped away at the hospital. We were with my Dad. Holding his hand. Very hard and sad. He was 79, Mom was 54/55. I'm just so sorry....

I'm sorry for your mom -- and for you, watching her lose ground day by day. Can you do some things to get your mind off this sadness from time to time? You need to keep yourself intact.

People tend to 'stay strong', but the toll can catch up with you in unexpected ways. I suddenly developed asthma a month after my mother's prolonged death, and have had to live with it for 40 years.

Be kind to yourself as well as to your mom.

Judy, I, too unfortunately, know how hard it is. Please know that you are both in my prayers.