Jeanne-I really enjoyed the party, the month of May just flew by. I will definitely remember this for the rest of my life, my great grand kids will hear this story I'm sure. Promise-Happy Birthday if I forget closer to the actual date. Our group is much richer for you having joined the group. So many winners in this swap month, congratulations to all. And Annie you made it all possible, thank you again. I have the month of June so will work on it tomorrow and post it when I get home from work. Shirley

I just attended a 25th anniversary and it was great... my younger cousin (20) hosted the event in honor of her parents (my aunt and uncle). Now keep in mind she is a full time university student paying her own tuition on a small budget. Because she was on a very tight budget she decided that she would have an open bar (which is fine by me as I am there to celebrate the 25 wonderful years that my aunt and uncle have shared.) Secondly she decided she would have everyone pay for their own meal... this is how she worked it out... she asked for $35 from each guest... $20 to go towards the meal, which was very good... and the remaining $15 from each guest was pooled together and given as one gift from the entire family to be put towards my aunt and uncles trip to Hawaii. I know it seems we paid for everything... but that is not the case... I think people sometimes overlook the other hosting details that add up... such as the venue, decorations, favors, cake, centre pieces and etc. She also hired a photographer, which I think is more important paying for than the bar... the photos are lifetime memories that will help remind our entire family of the amazing time we had that day/night. I am happy she kept my aunt and uncle in mind that day... it was there day and if that meant I had to spent a little bit of my money to make sure it was everything they dreamed, then so be it I LOVE MY FAMILY. I almost forgot... we raised $1800 toward their trip to Hawaii. Pretty good, eh! (Yes I'm Canadian.) Think about it! If I had to go out and get a card that's $5... gift wrap and bows $10-$15... a gift is approx. $50 or more if you want something worth buying... this would have added up to a lot more money. So basically I saved... I paid $35, $20 to my meal, $15 toward the Hawaii pool and approx. $12 on drinks the wine was free and set on the tables. So if you do the math based on buying a gift at $50 and the card and bow at $15... I saved $23, WOW! Sure she could have left the bar out all together, but I think it's best she gave her guests the option to have a few casual drinks or not. I mean really what does it really cost for a few good casual drinks approx. $15. Just my opinion! Have a good day!

My oldest is 8. Most of the time, I'v stayed. Once I left when it was 3 blocks from my house. If the party didn't include my other children, I left them home with DH. Like Mommabear, when the party is at a public place, I definitely stay. I think I would til DS is, oh, maybe 10. When I've stayed, other parents stayed, and we didn't expect to be fed. If the party was at someplace like Chuck E. Cheese, I would never expect the host parents to pay for my food or my other children if they were with me. Wouldn't dream of it. It would not occur to me to offer to pay for the parents who stayed if it were my kid's party, either. The party we had at home, I offered parents who stayed a soft drink and chips and a piece of cake (but most decline). It has been the same when I stayed at someone else's party, adults weren't fed and didn't expect to be. They don't stay because they want to be part of the party, they stay because they don't want to leave their children in an umfamiliar home or in an unsecure place, like Chuck E. Cheese. And because they are wise to want to know the children their child plays with and the parents of those children. I am 31 now. I don't have detailed memories of my parents dropping me off or not at parties at that age. Just don't remember. But even if they did, I can't make my choices based on what my parents did with me. There are a thousands things my parents let me do that I would never let my children do now. I do remember riding my bike all over town alone at age 8. My son is 8 now and I wouldn't let him go further than around the block on his bike. I'm sure most of us have similar experiences. Sadly, we can't let our children have the same freedoms we had at that age.

Yes, I've had that discussion with him many times. But all he does is complain non-stop about how he hates his condo and wants to move back into the house. He complains that he misses the house and then when I invite him over, he declines or comes over and realizes that it is making him sad. But then he is nonstop sad at the condo also. He complains that one thing makes him unhappy and if you take it away or get him the thing he said he wants instead, there is no relief, then that is the new source of his unhappiness. Yes, classic depression but he refuses treatment for it no matter how it is approached. He is just unhappy about all the time, but that is another OT story. I have tried many, many, many techniques and discussions and people and resources to try and help him. He's not bad enough functioning yet that I can take conservatorship of him and if I did that wouldn't solve any of the problems either, he would just be a combative ward with many more issues for me to try and deal with. At least this party was a successful distraction! He has good days and bad days. Also OT, living in the house makes me sad too, but I have to be here at least for a while to finish going through and taking care of all of my mom's belongings as well as any extra baggage of mine, before moving, if we do end up moving. The price of this house can't be beat.