First off, I'm sorry that you and your family got hit by Sandy. Yes, others perhaps had it worse, but that doesn't negate the loss you are dealing with. I wish you good luck and courage as you pick up the pieces and move forward. Perhaps an idea would be to deal with one store, go to the manager and say: I have to replace all my major (and minor) appliances. I'm also representing several other families. This will add up to dozens of appliances. What kind of a package can you put together for us that is of decent quality at a great price? I don't know if you'll have better luck at a big box versus a regional chain but I'd use the power of volume buying to try to negotiate prices. I got to wondering what kind of help is available specifically for what you're looking for. So I googled and found a few interesting items. http://www.ctmirror.org/blogs/energy-efficiency-deals-available-sandy-victims (this is for CT, I think you inferred you're in NJ?) I would call your local Sears store too: http://finance.yahoo.com/news/appliance-deals-rebuilding-plans-ny-211741139.html This company is selling washer/dryers at cost to Sandy victims: www.drimmers.com Beyond that Sears has "scratch and dent" stores, and a lot of the other chains have great deals on slightly damaged, returned or obsolete model goods. Good luck to you, your family and friends.

Okay Marilyn, this is the 'possum story. On New Year's morning, about 1 am, we woke up cold. My husband got up to see why, and the back door had blown open (in Texas even locked doors can blow open with our gentle breezes). He shut it and was heading back to bed when he glimpsed movement toward the study. Thinking it was the cat, he kept going to the bed, where our cat was sleeping on the quilt (a watchcat, she isn't). He checked, and there was a full grown possum wandering around the study (looking for something to read?). He started shooing the possum back to the door (shut) and trying to get the door open and the possum convinced to leave. He finally set up a slalom course with chairs to guide the possum out. When he came back to bed, I asked him what happened and he told me. Half asleep, I replied, "Well, thank heavens it wasn't a skunk." He couldn't get back to sleep for quite a while. Your husband would love Texas!

Ima,my mother in law made the complaint to myspace today. It was infact her fault that BM was able to obtain the pictures, and now all family members profiles and pictures are private. Yes, I know that once they are "out there" there is nothing I can do, I'm sure she has them saved to her computer and will always have them. As for her having to believe the things she says, it's more of a way for her to prove to her family out of state that she is who "they" think she is. We (my husband and myself) did in fact get it easy where gaining custody was concerned. Dhr/Cps was involved because of some health issues reguarding one of my step sons, with many DHR visits to the home she left them living in and her home, I was granted temporary custody per her request (dad had been trying for 2 yrs before hand) because of his job.A year later my husband and myself were granted full custody with no support and only supervised visitation from her on the first and third sunday of each month (she has never once followed through with a visit). It has since been ammended to no visitation and we have a protective order on her and her husband. My step kids were beaten, threatened with weapons and not fed for over a week the last time they were with their mother over 4 years ago. Not only do we have the protective order but our local ymca, ballpark and their school also have them. She has shown up numerous times and still continues to do so, to all of the above screaming they were kidnapped and are being held hostage. She has even tried to "kidnap" my youngest step son and my own son from walmart and they were in the buggy I was pushing. So in that aspect no we arent lucky as you tell me to consider myself. I know of the emotional damage a BM can do to a child, I see it daily times 3. As I said, I have a 9 yr old who thinks he should be a girl and a 7 yr old who vomits at will to not have to eat. AND FOR THE RECORD... I never in my post accused her of being a bad parent for giving up custody, I simply chose to post a FEW of the bad choices she has made over the years, but I will say now; I think she is a bad parent (not for giving up custody) for how she has emotionally and physically abused her children and allowed others to do the same. I think she is a bad parent because she still allows her husband to abuse her and their child together, instead of seaking help(and before you say I dont understand what an abusive relationship is like, I was in one for 7 years before I met my husband all of my teenage years and into my early 20's, eventually everyone knows enough is enough). Now, you asked why I wanted to contact a lawyer. No, not necessarily to sue her, she has nothing to sue for and she wouldnt show up in court anyways. To have it documented, yes. She shows up and causes enough trouble without aid of pictures at their school, ymca and sports activities ect. It does scare me to think she has updated pictures that she can wave around and them possibly have the chance of seeing. They know she wasnt there and Im unsure of what that could do to their stability, their mental capacities(they have alot to work through as it is) and their all around behavorial issues, even if it's only for that day or week. Do I think she will use them in that manner, yes. So again, no I dont want to sue her. I dont want to waste money we dont have to waste, energy I am completly drained of already or time that I never seem to have either. As for her myspace page, today was the first I knew of her having one and no I dont care to go back to it. All of my focus does now and has for almost 7 years gone into MY KIDS, I do love them and they know it and with their father's job I am 99.999% the only PARENT they have. I do also try and ignore her, I have only one other time fed into her pity party and that was her email, she isnt worth it. But yes, this makes me angry and I feel I have the right to be, as you stated you were doing the job of "your" BM, so am I. I have a myspace page, I dont post pictures (for this reason) of any of my kids, yet here she is posting them, ones she didnt take, from a holiday she was absent from and claiming MY son as her own child also, when she didnt want to be a parent to her own kids. No matter her reason behind it, I cant seem to want to let it lie. And your right, its not going to change or fix thing nor will it make them better, but I cant help how I feel. Maybe this is all too fresh having all happened today, and Im sorry if this post seems rude, but I didnt expect to be reprimanded or attacked for my earlier post and thats kind of how it felt.

I'm going to try to ignore the things TOS is writing about my situation b/c I know she is just trying to cause problems. I truly don't understand why you would try to do that in a place where you should offer support and encouragement, but whatever... But I must say...of course I realize that the destruction of a family is not humorous. I was just trying to be a little lighthearted. Their marriage has been over for years. As I've written several times now, my former husband passed away. After his death I found out he had several "girlfriends" on the side. You think that didn't destroy me??? Believe me, I could write a book about destruction. Anyway... Thank you, Kathline, for your response to my post. I will admit wholeheartedly that my attitude needs to change, and that's one reason I am here. I'm hoping that by hearing other stories of struggles, listening to what others have been through, it will help me to face my own problems with a better heart. Yes, I admit that I wrote that I don't like Sarah right now. She has lied to me and about me SO much that it makes me physically ill. She has stolen money, clothes, make-up and other belongings from me and 2 of my children, she has called my 12 year old disabled child "retard" right to his face on several occasions. And it's not 1 or 2 times...this is consistent behavior. It is VERY HARD to like someone when they constantly hurt you. Sarah knows nothing about the fact that we have looked into residential treatment for her. Nothing! We have also NEVER told her that we don't want her, although her own mother has several times. At one point a few months ago, Sarah was mad at dh and me for grounding her for something and she announced, "I want to go live with mommy." She called her mother and directly there on the phone her monther said, "nope, you can't come live here. You cause too many problems and I don't want you." I felt horrible for Sarah, at the same time understanding how bm felt (b/c Sarah, if possible, often acts worse at her mom's house than she does here). We have to check her bags when she comes home on Sunday nights from her mom's house and more often than not, she has stolen something from there. So yes, Sarah is aware that he bm doesn't like her or want her to live with her, but as I said, she knows nothing about us looking at residential homes and I have NEVER said, "I don't like you, Sarah." Now she might get the feeling that I don't, but isn't that something she needs to earn, kind of like my trust. Would you "like" someone that continued to steal and lie from you CONSTANTLY??? I hope I'm not coming across like I just want people to agree with me, b/c I am VERY open to hearing all opinions. And if you think I'm horrible b/c I said I don't like Sarah much right now, it's okay. Believe me, I feel pretty bad myself and I'm trying to change that. I'm just so frustrated in this situation. Thanks everyone! :)