I'm the opposite of you. I can not be late. Frequently I am early. Even with Mom, going through her purse three times before leaving the house. I need to kick back but I'd rather wait then make someone wait. Lol. My parents had careers that were time related.

I am continuing my single resolution this year. Live in the present. It is so much easier on the soul.

I think that's a great one -and one I ought to add to my list. But for right now, I have two things on my mind.

The first is an attitude shift which I've come to after viewing a few inspirational TED talks. When faced with "You can be right, or you can be happy" -I'm choosing happy.

The second is my mantra for the new year:
"Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake." -Victor Hugo

I've made it a resolution to be on time too! I've also noticed the creep-where I'm about 10 minutes late, but sometimes that starts moving to 15 minutes, and to me that is just unacceptable, so I really need to work on that.

My other is to consume less of everything. To buy less-use up what I have, buy 2nd hand where it makes sense, live with less. Along with that comes the resolution to buy as local as possible. Even if it means spending a bit more, there is a value in keeping it local.

I have other general resolutions (eat better, get more sleep, less time on the computer) but these are the ones I want to really concentrate on to make a difference in my life.

gold dust, I've heard that saying, "live in the present" for years and I've just realized I have absolutely no idea what that means. Could you please explain it to me - especially how you would do it practically as a resolution. Thanks!

"You can be right, or you can b e happy" -I'm choosing happy.

Wow, this is timely. Not to share too much of my dirty laundry here heh.. but we've been experiencing some stress in our relationship because we end up bickering and then fighting over the dumbest things. Seriously dumb. I get so wrapped up in being clearly understood and/or being right that I sometimes carry a stupid comment or misunderstanding to the stress point (or I allow him to). I don't like, want or need the bickering-- with him or with anything else. I can sit and nitpick the little things or I can let them go.. and be happy. I am with you, Bestyears. I choose Happy.

Now I have to figure out how to do it. I guess I need to check out TED. :)

daisy, I think this is a pretty good, easy-to-understand explanation of living in the present. If it appeals to you, you may want to explore the writings of the Dalai Lama. I find that when I practice living in the present, I am amazingly more joyful and serene. I am not fully successful, but continue to work on it. I have been fairly successful in doing it in my job (teaching) and it has made a huge difference.

If you enjoy exercise, try yoga. Meditation is good for this as well. Trailrunner can add so much about that!

Here is a link that might be useful: live in the present

Hmm, Daisy. I try not to over think things. I don't dwell on what/who needs to be fixed. I don't have regrets. I try to enjoy every moment, whether I'm cleaning toilets or cooking or being with family and friends. I religuish control of how anything needs to be done. I'm nice to myself. Continted. Stress free.

It's easier now that my children are grown...

I try to live the *you can be right or ...* with a slight twist. People generally don't like someone who HAS to be right all the time so I look at it as I can be right or I can be lonely. There's something very freeing in allowing someone else to claim victory but I believe that also comes with age.

Generally I don't make resolutions but if there is anything I want to change in my life it's that I don't get to see my sons enough. I allow my frugality to get in the way. It's expensive to fly to them, stay in a hotel etc and time slips away while I wait for low air fare. At this point I'd rather have some credit card debt for a few months (which we've never allowed) and see them more.

I've been trying to practice "living in the present" for the past year and it does relieve stress.

Also, along the same lines, my favorite sayings now are "I'm not going to worry about that today if I can't do anything about it", along with "It's OK to say NO!"

One can only "spread themself so thin". Or is it their self??? Can't think about that right now:).

haha, Tuesday. BTW, it is either herself or himself. ;)

thanks cyn, I will have a look at that. I'm also a teacher and anything that relieves stress is most welcome :-)

I've just signed up for 2 yoga classes - one mother/daughter class and one with my dh. Very much looking forward to it. I've been promising I would do this for years and something has always got in the way. Now kids are older, I'm settled into working full-time routines, etc. Looking forward to my me-time.

golddust, all that makes much sense and seems so easy, but I know it is not. Instead of saying I will, I think I will say, I will move towards ...

I think what helps at school (stress to the max for teachers these days) is acceptance. I do what I can and let go of the rest. My only real concern is the kiddoes and all that other "stuff" (paperwork, evaluation demands, etc.)is much less important to me these days. Of course, it is easier now that I am older and approaching retirement, but all in all, I have finally realized that administrators are going to do what they do and I will do what I do.

Hope you love the yoga classes. We had someone come to school last semester, but not enough people signed up to continue and there is just so much to do that most people felt they couldn't spend that hour after school on it. I found it to be the perfect way to let go of the day. Now, I will need to either find a convenient class elsewhere or try finding yoga on our Comcast on-demand and then make sure I do it every day!

You aren't in Northern Virginia by any chance, are you? I teach in Fairfax County.

Well, duh...living in the present, I guess I let go of the previous post about Florida when you said you are north of Fargo.

Nevermind. I guess instead of mindFULness, I am practicing mindLESSness. ;)

lol, mindlessness is not a bad deal, cyn.

I like the simplicity of your one and only "be on time" resolution, running. It makes it easy to remember and accomplish instead of coming up with a whole list! I think I will do the same instead of piling it on.

Lots of good thoughts here.

This post was edited by snookums2 on Mon, Dec 31, 12 at 15:55

Wow, what an enlightened group! How refreshing & inspiring! What is more important than living in the now & practicing mindfulness? Nothing. But it's so very counter-cultural. We get next to no guidance or support for walking this path.
Our culture is hell bent on convincing us that something is not quite right about ourselves or our experience at any given moment. We are taught to strive for more, better, new & improved versions of our lives at all times. I hear voices here saying "No...seen it, done it been there. I'd like to try on just 'being' for size."

In the event that change really is in order, maybe the most empowering changes stem from first accepting the situation on some level rather than resisting it.

My conditioning has led me to always be trying to say "yes" to the "right" experiences & "no" to the "wrong" ones. It is imperitive to always practice "good judgement" right? But who really knows what's better? I'd like to experiment with letting go of even trying to know what's better! ( How many times have I beat the dead horse: I shouldn't have bought this house. I could have done much 'better!' Or a million other variations on the same theme!).

What if I allowed myself to have *this* experience in *this* place at *this* time? Maybe I'd free myself up to experience a lot of the richness of "this" life. (Or I can keep getting lost in some hypothetical, imagined, "what if?" life!).

May we all awaken to the joys of being present! Happy New Year!

While these resolutions are fine, I try not to make any....to me, every day is an opportunity to improve oneself or make a resolution...no need to wait for the calendar to hit a certain date.... I've spent way too many mondays "starting a diet" to know that it's just an excuse to not diet on sunday...

I don't disagree Annie.. and I don't label ANYTHING a resolution (other than quitting smoking-- and that didnt coincide the new year). That said, it's natural to reflect at the new year and to look at where you struggled and where you could be better. I don't think you make real change and real improvements without looking at every day as an opportunity to improve.

I have to laugh because my ny resolution for last year has been "speak truth to crazy" and oddly enough it has really worked in my family. I may keep it for 2013 : )

No resolutions for me. I'm going to make some friendly suggestions to myself and if I ignore my own good advice, I'm the only one who will suffer.

(Pretty sure there's a clinical term for this, lol.)

Here are an assortment of thoughts for now and the New Year and well...for all times :) I find Pema a refreshing change from many of the saccharine outlooks that we are fed in this life. Sometimes we just "feel like sh^&" and it doesn't hurt to acknowledge that !

My best friend is in NYC tonight. She is with her DD and DH . When she comes home she has a biopsy to get through. It is a repeat so see if the treatments she went through this Summer helped. I felt like I had to talk to her tonight. I called at 10 PM her time. She answered very hesitantly...I guess with caller ID she was wondering why in the h&*(( I was calling her...never have done it before LOL. She probably figured something was really wrong here...nope I just wanted to hear her voice and more importantly I wanted her to hear mine. All new territory for me...never have done anything like this . Wow..did it feel good...stepping way outside my comfort zone.

Here is a link that might be useful: Pema quotes

Good for you, Trail. Because I don't force my love on my best friend, she loves me more when I reach out to her. I know when she needs a friend but least expects it. (Daniel is a challenge and a heartbreak.) I ask the questions that I know her answers will offer relief. I listen without judgement. She is walking a path I would wish on no one. When she can't defend her son any longer, she knows I will.