I so identify. Luckily mine just left for his ski job for a few hours. Sometimes I wonder if logic is even built into mens' brains, or is it just mine?

LOL Sounds like us. We are putting in a new bathroom vanity top. Hasn't been to bad. It was a good opportunity to clean out the cabinets storage area, drawers etc. Why do we save that stuff? I would be so embarrassed if my kids had to do that. I think I shouldn't stop there.

& I thought I was going to be able to add a third thing to your list:

wallpaper!

Many years ago, a friend told me after a long week-end she spent wallpapering with her husband:

"We had a big old fight, & then we had to go have some margaritas, & we almost got a divorce anyway."

We almost didn't make it to the altar after wallpapering a tiny bathroom in what was to be our newlywed apartment. I could believe that wallpaper was invented by matrimonial attorneys.

Have to go. Bellowing from the bedroom: "Where are my socks?"

Well, I finally did get a divorce a long time ago but not over stuff like this.

Here's one of the things that drove me crazy. For awhile we lived out of state from family. We had a baby and were going home for Christmas. I did all the washing, packing, present shopping, wrapping, house cleaning -- absolutely everything with said child with me every minute. All he had to do was pack it in the car. He pitched a fit at all the stuff (you now how much crap a baby needs) and we had a doozy of a fight. I don't think a word was said from CT to PA. It had taken me days and days to organize it all and if all I'd had to do was shove it in the car, I'd be grateful, but noooooo.

Speaking of wallpaper, after we had split I decided to re-wallpaper the powder room. I went to get out the wallpapering tools and found that he had sneaked in the house and taken it all. Frankly I'd have gladly given it to him. I just would have liked to know it was gone before I got all set to start the job.

I love being single.

Let's just say I'm better with tools and assembling things than dh. He just isn't good with anything mechanical. His 'help' totally annoys me. He always wants to do it his way when 1.) my way is superior, and 2.) it was my idea to begin with. I usually wait until he is out of the house and then sneak it in.

I'm working on a design for the back yard. He asked to see my plans yesterday. I showed him my pins from Pinterest. Let's just say I'm more of a creative type and my plans are spectacular. The yard will either be awesome or a complete failure. He mentioned budget. Given my way, the costs will be low because I like to reuse and repurpose and buy things on clearance. Only a few things will be at full cost. He likes me to give him my ideas then knock them down. My designs work better when they are a complete surprise. I like to work, look at my work, add things, move things around and then work some more.

oh the things to do on a winter's day!! I have this thin drawer that I have under the main top shelf... we keep lunch meat in it...does that ring a bell?

I have to say I lucked out. My DH is a mechanical genius. He can fix anything from a broken Barbie to a broken tractor. Its just finding the time to do the little things. He is so busy, that I usually just call a plumber or electrician when I need something done in the house. He did make the time to fix those Barbies back in the day though :)

We get a long - I just stand there and hand him tools.

My DS works with DH a lot now. DS got my car running the other morning and fixed my garage door for me - and he is still in high school. He is going to make an awesome husband some day! I hope he finds a girl that appreciates him (and his Dad) as much as I do! âÂÂ¥

DH isn't too handy around the house, but his other qualities make up for that completely, don't want to sound like I'm complaining.

But I'm better at repairs, construction than he is - painting, assembly, you name it...my dad was an engineer and my brother is - I think I have their type thinking built in.

DH is the brawn, I'm the brains ;) You'd think we'd make a good team on projects - we don't. Maybe it comes from being so comfortable with our spouses, we're too quick to say whatever's on our minds. His brother told me one time he thought we worked well together, we've canned tuna, I've even driven his dump truck in the fields while putting in hay with no cross words between us. His wife/my SIL wouldn't get away with no criticism of her skills shifting that antique truck, but I could :) Boundaries, we have boundaries with someone else that I don't share with my husband.

My first husband ( of 57 years) could and did fix anything. When we were first married I came home from work to find the landlord's vacuum cleaner in pieces all over the floor. He was fixing it! And it worked wonderfully. I found out then a big new attribute he had. Through the years he did an amazing lot of things like that. I always told our 4 daughters that he could fix anything for them with the possible exception of a broken heart!

morz8, thats me and mine.

For years I worked with my BIL. We got along great at work and outside (still do).
I spent many hours helping them remodel their house and move a barn. It got to be he would listen to my advice but not his wife (my sister)
One day my sister politely told me it bothered her (I think it bugged her more than she let on), but we had a nice talk.
It's been many years, but I have never forgotten that discussion and have since tried to keep it in check.
There was never, ever any romantic feelings, just a like-minded approach to things (mostly problem solving) that we neither one had with our spouses.

Hahaha, I was going to add wallpapering to your list, too! I always wallpaper alone, same with painting.

Too funny, Sylvia about the margarita story!

My husband decided to clean a toilet one day. I was dying laughing when he first shut off the water and plunged the bowl so it would be empty. Talk about making something harder than it needed to be! So I sympathize about the fridge cleaning!

Mine also rearranged all the little herb and spice jars because he didn't like my method. Alphabetical!!! He said it didn't make sense. OMG! Men and their retirement, how do we survive it?

I learned long time ago, DH and I don't work together at all. That is what kids are for. Both DD's worked great with their DAD and son worked better with me. At to fixing??? DH did kind of----now he is gone, Son in law is more agreeable and easier to get along with. DD (his wife) is good. I just make a good supervisor. I am always rearranging and moving furniture etc. Don't like to paint or clean. I would rather pay someone, and I do.

Salgal, no hints of jealousy issues here, his wife and I are very close. We were two young women from much smaller quieter families who married into this noisy, boisterous tightly knit group that was 10 brothers and sisters, and I think we clung together out of desperation for a couple of those first early years, a wild ride for sure ;)

I had a friend who once said she thought before a couple gets married, they should wallpaper a very small bathroom together. If they could survive that, the marriage just might have a chance. LOL

I paint and wallpaper by myself.

Several years ago DH decided (without my knowledge) to rearrange the contents of drawers and cabinets in the kitchen. He thought his idea flowed better. I promptly went out to the garage and rearranged his tools as to what I thought "flowed" better. He never touched my kitchen again :)

We also never paint or take down wallpaper together. We did put up wall paper border together in our sons rooms. We barely survived that so we knew putting up an entire wall of wallpaper would not work.

I can have an entire room painted before he has the stuff ready to go. It's just too painful to watch him getting ready to do things.

He wouldn't dare rearrange the kitchen.

But what he does do is remove spiders, change lightbulbs, organize and take out the garbage, puts down the toilet seat and never leaves his laundry on the floor. I'm happy.

My DH aced everything else, but flunked the mechanical ability tests for officer's training at college. I grew up helping my divorced mother do as much 'man's work' as a small female can do. I'm no repair wizard, but I can usually understand how things work.

For almost 50 years, every repairman, car salesman, etc. has directed his comments only to my DH while I just stand there. It takes a few exchanges between me and the guy -- while DH just stands there -- before the guy gets it: "Oh, SHE is the 'mechanical one' here."

I'd like to add moving furniture to that list of things not to do.....

DH and I put up several wallpaper borders without arguing- but on one (we have 12' ceilings and it was a foot down from the ceiling), he accidentally walked off the end of the scaffolding as I was directing him (from the floor) where to straighten it up. Disloyally, my very first thought was "Oh no, he's probably broken his arm and we won't be able to finish the room!" :-) Fortunately he was OK :-)
We're still married after thirty years.
What we don't get on well doing together is finding things. I'm good at it and he isn't ;-) If he loses something it just provokes an argument if I try to look for it for him while he's still looking, because he just gets madder and madder when he can't find it, and I do. So I have to wait until he gives up, then go find it.

This post was edited by colleenoz on Mon, Jan 6, 14 at 23:44

Once husband was measuring for a chair rail in the foyer in our last house. He added a foot to be on the safe side and was four inches short!!

Today the new dishwasher arrived and he directed the guy to our side entrance rather than the back porch one which is mere feet from the DW.

(BTW, the black Bosch looks fantastic. Glad I didn't go stainless. Extremely quiet, but I think it's smaller than the old Maytag. )

LOL, love all the stories of getting along (or not) while working together. Isn't it interesting how husbands upon retirement often become "experts" at household chores.

Please don't misunderstand me. My Dh is in fact a genius..in his own realm. The word is out in the family, friends and neighborhood that he is the one to call when something needs fixing. Yes, I do have to wait on the back burner at times. His job title at GM was Experimental Mechanic. After 54 years of wedded bliss he still amazes me with what he can do. If he is tearing down an engine, every part will be taken apart for cleaning, etc before replacing.

He is always thinking about how to improve things.
Over the years this sweet man has adapted many things to make my life easier as my disability from Muscular Dystrophy progresses. I have a wonderful elevator that he made from a mechanics lift table. It raises me up the 30 inches from the garage level to the living area of the house. I have no real complaints, just amusement when a simple thing like the arrangement of the refrigerator shelves confounded him. He really was just concerned that the placements were the easiest for me to work with.

The left over piece, by the way, he realized last evening belonged up close under the meat drawer. Not really visable. It's purpose is part of the extra cooling system of that area that has a separate setting from the rest of the refrigerator.

In spite of it all, I am going to keep him.

Well, I don't have the problems of husband trying to help me. Once I asked him if he would empty the trash in a bag in a big crock. What does he do, he is waddling with the crock that is so heavy instead of just lifting out the bag and getting rid of it. I had to tell him how to empty it. Then there is the time I asked if he could help mop as we had company coming. To this day he still says, he is the only one that ever mops and that has been years ago. Wonder if he ever notices it is mopped, I guess not since he is the only one that mops here!

Sue

It is physically painful for me to watch dh try to paint. I can't bear to even think about it.

Imagine a man who has good bearing and sense (I said he has them, not that he always uses them) suddenly going slack-jawed, slumped, one hand in a pocket (it drives me crazy to see someone with hand/s in a pocket) and smearing a paint brush over, and over, and over, the same area until it's a sticky, lumpy mess.

He makes a simple task so much work.

I love to paint. I spend hours on prep; removing everything (nails, electrical plates, lighting fixtures). I clean, and Swiffer, and tape. I put down plastic sheets and tape them to the floor. I set up my paint station with everything I could possible need laid out on the stand like surgical instruments.

Then the next day I begin the painting. I use primer; I cut in, and do the "W" with the roller, apply thin coats, and am through in no time at all. I'll brag; I'm a damn fine painter. It's just that I go slowly and spend far more time with prep and staging than I do in the actual applying of the paint.

He wants to grab a can of paint and start smearing.

I am the painter in the house. He will, after I've done all the prep, sometimes help with the roller parts, but I have to keep reminding him to not go over the area that already has paint. He can't "see" how it pulls up.

So, I do the painting or hire a helper. The one lady that does the best work, even better than mine, is 72. Watching her paint is like seeing poetry. I love her to death. I do the fetch and carry for her, clean her brushes, fix her lunch, and learn at the feet of the master!

So, never, ever try to paint with a husband. God made Man; then he made Woman. He made them attractive to one another. Then he sat back and had a good, long chuckle.

ole joyfuelled ... beating a hasty retreat!

We don't paint well together!!I believe in doing the prep work,like taping things,cover the floor etc.Dh thinks he can just wing it,thing is he can't.Then i have extra cleanup to do because he splattered paint somewhere.

The other thing he does more often,is drop and spill stuff on the floors and doesn't seem to notice.As i told my sister,when he makes up a salad,i could j ust pour dressing on what he drops on the floor,and eat f rom the floor!!l. Lol

Think it all has to do with age,as when he was a marine(retired)and for a good many years after he was Mr.Neat and tidy,he's just gotten this way in the last 10 years or so..

I tell myself sometimes that it is because of the stroke he had several years ago.The kids think the same as we used to offer to give him some white gloves,so he could do a proper inspection..........
Kathi

This brings back some funny memories....Years, and I mean years, ago, My Mom and Dad were wallpapering the dining room....Mom was a wiz but with my Dad, that just wasn't his thing! They had 1 strip across the ceiling and got into an argument, Dad quit and Mom finished the whole room by herself along with the 9 ft. ceilings.....

But, when hubby and I do anything, it's a version of Frick and Frack...It's best if I just wait until he's out and then "do it".......

That sounds so much like my own DH that all I can do is laugh...I know he would even have his little leveling device that throws a beam to make sure all the shelves were level etc etc One of my moveable shelves slips and has been broken for years...a couple of years ago, he was going to improve on my fix....I took a could of wooden clothespins and inserted them where the original clip was so that the shelves couldn't slide...He worked for probably an hour and eventually put back my wooden clothes pins.......

Oh yes, everything is done to perfection. Makes me crazy sometimes. Yesterday a bulb burned out in the ceiling fan in a back room. He went to replace it. An hour later, I realized that he was still back there. Went to check on him, Well there he was sitting on the floor with the whole fan assembly completely taken apart scattered around him. He says, "I'm gonna get that irritating hum outta this thing or out it goes." It took a couple trips to the basement where I could hear the lathe running and other sounds of mass destruction going on. The fan is now back in place and he has pronounced it "quiet as a church mouse," so I guess it stays.

My husband and I were able to do many things together, including paint and wallpaper. He also could fix anything. How I miss him, but if I need something fixed now I do it myself using skills I learned from him or one of my grown sons does it; they are just like him.

I was always told the two things never to do with your spouse are 1) wallpaper and 2) sort hogs. As a former pork producer and someone who has done both wallpapering and hog sorting w/ current spouse, I can attest that those ring true.

I've learned it's just best to do many things alone. He's dependent on me for nighttime driving (he has a hard time staying awake) and city driving (he never lived or learned) but yet his back seat driving would lead you to believe he's the world's greatest.