I'll tell you my terrible experience with Versed. After being induced and laboring for 2 days it was decided to do a c-section. It was the worst thing in the world. The Versed, knocked me out, but I was awake and couldn't tell them. I felt the complete c-section from beginning to end. In my mind I was telling them how much it hurt and to stop and do something, but my husband and Doctor and nurses all said that I didn't say anything during the surgery. Afterwards they told me that I was dreaming it and that I couldn't have felt anything. When I met with the Anisthesiolgost before my second c-section they told me that The Versed probably knocked out my communication skills and made it so that I couldn't communicate. I was so freaked out about having a 2nd c-section that I told my husband if I started blinking my eyes that I could feel what they were doing. Well I didn't feel anything but when They did the spinal for the c-section they did it too high and it affected my diaphram. I was having a hard time breathing, and the only thing that they could give me was Versed, I refused and told them instead just to sit by my head and remind me to breath. I am glad someone posted this and that I am not the only one with a reaction. When ever they ask about allergies, Versed is first on my list. Stacie

Thank you all-- I am researching what everyone has mentioned to see if anything "fits." Carol, I will keep in mind what your friend went through, in case it progresses. We saw a neuro at a nationally famous children's hospital. She does NOT think they are migraines, as the symptoms don't fit, and the typical migraine treatment doesn't work for DD. She thinks the pain is very real but that they are stress-related. :( Hard to say. We are going to be keeping a journal to try to figure out why some days are better than others. However, her treatment is to lie down in quiet for 30 minutes (along with meds/water) and DD is now avoiding complaining because she does not want to lie down. I can see on her face and in her behavior when she is in more pain, even when she does not talk about it. It's still a mystery at this point. I am thinking of alternative medicine next-- maybe acupuncture, and other stress management sources. I am just still worried they are missing something. I know of too many cases where the person was not given a correct dx.

Thank you, justmetoo. Apparently his school has an attendance policy but it is for absences in specific classes, and not total days. For whatever reason the teachers do not seem to really enforce it; DH has access to and checks his grades online (unfortunately they don't update them all that often, so he was completely caught off-guard this time). But his absences in individual classes are still under the allowable total (even though that does not appear possible, but at this point why borrow trouble?) I guess teachers are loathe to fail seniors just for exceeding allowable absences, but that is just a guess. He's a bright kid and so can bring his grades up to at least finals of passing if he wants to. No idea what BM was thinking, if anything. All she had to do was send renewal paperwork so no idea why she didn't. Yes, she's aware that he would have been treated; there was an issue last year where another relative up there took SS17 to ER and called down here trying to get insurance information because BM could not be reached. At that time she assured DH that he did have insurance and she would be contacting hospital to see that they got the information. I am just so angry and worried right now. We should be concentrating on SS8 and not be distracted by SS17's ongoing health/school issues. That's not that I mean that I don't want him to get treated ASAP as well; I'm just so upset that something that should have been taken care of months ago got dumped onto DH at this time. Thanks for letting me vent. I felt sometimes like I was the only one in these situations until I found this site.

I can only imagine what you're feeling, but I'd urge you to think things through very carefully before taking any dramatic and rash steps. Imagine your husband consents and you win custody of your son. You already know your husband doesn't love him and doesn't want him in your lives. How will he treat your son? Will that really be better for your son? And at what cost to you? What will day-to-day life be like? And will you have to walk on eggshells to buffer your husband from your son? If your son doesn't really want to move, what will happen if he misbehaves on purpose? If your ex decides to cause turmoil for you all? If your ex starts with the mind games? Imagine your husband consents and the custody battle drags on for months and months (like most do), increasing the stress level in your home, draining "his money" (I put that in quotes because I imagine that's how he will see it) and taking your time and energy away from meeting his needs? Imagine his relief if you lose, and your resentment of his relief. Now imagine your husband refuses your request. You say you have packed, but are you really ready to walk out dramatically? You have money? A job? A place to live? What about your daughter? Will she be better off if you leave? How's your marriage otherwise? And will your son be any better off if you leave? How? Will you even be able to get custody of him without your husband's financial resources? A second divorce won't look very attractive to a family court judge. If he's still only visiting you, will he now be visiting you in a crappy apartment no better than his dad's? Have you taken a close look at your children's behaviors? Many stepparents on this forum report that one or all of the stepkids are spoiled brats, treat them with disrespect, ignore them, etc. How does your son behave? And is there anything in his behavior that could cause or contribute to your husband's indifference? And does your son want to live with you now? Enough to change some behaviors? I'm certainly not recommending you do nothing --- only that you do nothing in haste. Drama is good for daydreams, but for real life, it's traumatic and destructive. Walking out could mean ending your marriage, and it's unlikely to get you what you want --