I too, have a "jane" in the family. Several aactually. Just know that whatever you decide, she will probably feel negatively about it. She sounds kinda jealous. If you bring all the gifts at once, she will talk about how you spend too much and are just trying to show off. If you only bring one small one, she will probably say that you should have gotten her something bigger since apparently she thinks your rolling in dough. (whether you are or not is really irrelevant) In my case, i am the youngest of six adult children(ill be 30 in a few months). I am the only one who is unmarried, and have no children(unless you count the four legged furry kind) :) No matter WHAT i do, my older siblings always feel it necessary to comment on how i waste my money, im not good with money, i have no budget, im irresponsible with money, etc. None of which is true. I make a good enough living to support myself and have a little extra for fun and savings. I live very much below my means, although comfortable. I drive the same car i bought (all by myself thank you very much) at age 18. However, some people are just naturally negative nancys. I learned a long time ago to do whatwever the heck i want, especially when it comes to my hard earned cash. You should do the same. P.S. I am sure that the soon to be mommy will very much appreciate everything you got for her. Baby showers are not thrown to celebrate a pregnancy, not really anyway.If they were, they would not require gifts would they? They are to help new parents with some of the things they need for baby.I would put everything in one giant box and wrap it, therefore making it "one" gift. Your "michelle" is the only one you should think about now. Jane's opinions should be kept to herself or ignored.

Ohhhh shower ettiquite is such a pain! as much for the recipient as the person throwing them sometimes (due to folks like the mom in this situation. Had we not had ds 7 weeks early we would have had four showers. I have two very close friends who planned on but the guest list was getting obnoxious. When you have a baby in your 40s people just want to be involved. So those two gals split the big one up and hosted on different weeks and we made sure that there were no duplicate invites. And even that turned out to be a political nightmare! Then my assistant wanted to have an office one (a tradition at the office) and so did dh's. The sad part being we really didn't need anything. I only tell you this because it ended up being a rather awful stress on dh and I (all the wrangling for the invite they wanted etc). So my only advice is to chat with her first so she does not feel bad about it. I personally loved the love that went into the shower planning from all sides, but I hoped many times that one or all four would cancel! Apparently ds heard me because he came before the final three were to be held and then he was too I'll for me to be involved in a shower type party after birth. Bless that boy lol. A person as old as your loved one might want to invite special friends as well as family so try to give her the opportunity? And whatever you do don't invite Ron and Jeanette! (ok bad flashback lol). I think what you are doing is lovely (as long as it does not include shower games or those cheap pastel mints in diapers made of felt and paraffin).

Last 3 baby showers I went to played: Let each person pull a length of toilet paper off a roll, the one that's piece fits around mom-to-be the closest wins.2nd game, fill a bowl with uncooked plain white rice. Mix in several packages of loose safety pins. Hold the bowl over each persons head, they reach up and grab a handfull of rice and pins. The person who grabs the most safety pins wins. You need a 2nd person to be standing there with a bowl or styrofoam plate that the player can dump their handfull of rice and pins in and it can be counted before dumping back in the rice & pin bowl. It is a lot of fun when you can get male guests to play too. 3rd. game have a list of items used for baby, scramble words and see who is first to unscramble correctly all words. You can see I have been to baby showers with the past 6 months. Oh, nice suggestion, ask everybody to give a book instead of a card with gift. I found a baby cloth book at one of the craft shows I did for last baby. Mom-to-be really liked it.

Lisa, Some ideas from an "older" woman! Please take them in the vein they are offered, and do what you please. I'm not really that old, but I can get considerably grumpy at times, LOL. BTW, I just turned 50. The only baby showers I expect to be invited to anymore are for my son's wife if he ever has one, or one child of my very best friend. I know the idea of having the guests address their own thank-you envelopes is an idea that has taken off among the younger set - but seriously, as an "older person", I was shocked the first time it happened to me, and a bit offended, too! Reasoning - I've been invited, I've taken time to either make or shop for a gift, and the bride (in my case) or mother-to-be can't take enough time to write her own thank-you notes? Either thank me, or don't, but don't make me work for a thank-you note. I'd rather not have it. If you're going to be having a large number of older people, you may consider having (assigning) someone to fill out those envelopes, or have it done in advance, or just skip it. The older folks will be offended. And you or your daughter will all ready have the addresses if you've invited the people. Use a computer and print out the address labels in advance. Also, JMHO, favors are not necessary! I came for the party to "shower" the mother-to-be with a gift, and I really don't want a "thing" to take away. A thing means I have to store it, or use it, or pitch it - in other words, it puts an additional obligation on me. And a favor that is a food item will be left by more than 1/2 the guests - been there, seen it happen too many times. Save the money and start a savings account, LOL. If you absolutely must do favors, please, an unscented candle (I have asthma), wrapped in the tulle with a ribbon, but I don't want to have to throw out a plastic safety pin, diminutive bottle or other "baby" thing. And I will throw them out, and so will your guests! But I could possibly reuse the ribbon. I find it wasteful of both money and resources to stick little plastic things on gifts. I much prefer to be provided with a beautiful chocolate truffle to eat AT the shower - and one is enough. I LOVE, LOVE the idea of a clothesline on the wall to pin the outfits on!! I think that's brilliant! I also think the decorated onesies are a wonderful idea! Also great is the idea of having guests sign or draw on a quilt block. Have them all over-sized, with the freezer paper already ironed on. Draw the border, so they don't go into the seam allowance. Have fabric crayons or pigma markers ready, as well as some ideas for simple drawings from coloring books, or a list of "baby sayings" for them to write. As to the games - I'm not hard of hearing, but I also have little tolerance of shower games. I would not participate in a measuring of the mother's belly. I was 29 when I had my baby, and I was horrified when people at work wanted to touch my belly - and work people threw me a shower. Fortunately my DH worked at the same place, and he stopped them from playing that game. LOL. They still made me a fricking hat from all the ribbons, and insisted I wear it for a photo. I didn't like that either, but tolerated it with good grace. Bingo might be tolerable. Understand, all of these shower games started when it was giddy 18 and 19 year old girls having babies, and the people who attended baby showers were all the same age, and the only older people were the mums and grandmums. Friends of the parents didn't usually attend. They showed up AFTER the birth with a lovely blanket or outfit, several days after Mother and baby were home. So I don't know how old your DD is, and you have to consider both her and the audience. I was a good 10 years older when I had my first than my mother was. My sensibilites and preferences were too. Shower food - crudite and dip, fruit and dip, finger sandwiches if you wish, cake, punch, tea and coffee. Maybe a truffle. Please take this in the way I intend it - tongue in cheek for the most part, but also trying to save you some money. I would concentrate on nice food and drink, no favors, only one game at the most. Sit around! Eat! Open presents! Nothing more is required of a good shower. Hoping I didn't sound too grumpy, LOL. Mary