Grieving the loss of my mother
joannegreco
16 years ago
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socks
16 years agojoannegreco
16 years agoRelated Discussions
Grieving for my children
Comments (10)Ashly Dawn, I am so sorry for your loss. It was so recent, please give yourself more time. I lost a baby at 6 months 10 years ago. I remember feeling many of the same feelings you are feeling. I remember being so sad, then so numb, then so angry that everyone was going on with their lives and seemed to forget about my son. I just wanted to shout it from the roof tops or take out a front page ad that I have a beautiful baby boy in heaven. I also remember feeling like I was doing okay, then having unprovoked melt downs at my job. I ended up taking a mild antidepressant for about 6 months and it really helped me to feel more in control. We don't know why these things have to happen. But the thing is, we're not supposed to know why. We just have to accept it and realize that all lives, even the little one's like our babies, their lives are significant and purposeful. There is a reason why you gave carried, loved, and gave birth to these beautiful babies. And their lives had meaning. They certainly changed you life forever and the way you think about things. I know that God can use us all for his glory, even our tiny babies. Did you have any pictures taken of your babies? What helped me alot was to put together a baby book - not the kind that we often see that has babies first steps, ect. I just found a photo album that said "baby" on the front. Inside I memorialized my sons life. I collected everthing from the hospital - birth certificate, ect. newspaper announcement of his birth/death, anything special that I had, then I collected poems about babies, sons, death, ect. All things that moved me and were relevant to his life. Then at last I put photos of him. I also had bible verses that I had typed and printed out. I have the receiving blanket from the hospital too nearby. It is very private, I have showed it to no one except my mother and my spouse. But it is there, I know it is there, and when I think of him I can pull it out to remember. I plan to share it with my children when they are older. Did you get foot prints and / or hand prints? They can go in there or you can get them framed and hung in a picture. Just remember that most people will not say what you need to hear. But that is not because they do not care. They are just ignorant and do not know what to say. Talk to those who know you best and can listen to you as you grieve. And talk to those who have been through it too. Check out support groups in your area for moms like you. Again I'm so sorry for your losses. Give your heart time to heal....See MorePoem for grieving mothers
Comments (3)Very heartfelt poem and so fitting for a mother that has lost a child. You are so courageous to continue walking the path you are on in the shoes you have been forced to wear..........See MoreGrief, Loss of my mother
Comments (3)I lost my Mom 4 years ago. I still cry a few times every month. Several years ago I asked her if she still thought about her Mother, My Grandma..she said "oh honey, I think about her everyday". I remember thinking how extraordinary that was. Now I get it. I have to share this poignant moment I had. I had returned home from my Mom's funeral in another state. My hubby and I took care of his mother, who was wheelchair bound. She had her sister and cousin over. I was sharing what it was like to lose my Mother. Aunt Wanda, who was 80 started crying. I felt so bad that I made this old woman cry. Then she said "I was crying, because I was remembering MY MOTHER crying at Christmas time, because she missed HER MOTHER". I said "Let me get this straight, you are crying over your mother who was crying over her mother"? LOL. Ya know how you laugh and cry at the same time? I never had a moment in life like that..We women stared at each other. The bond women share, mothers..love..life..it is so special. I now know how very important I am to MY DAUGHTER and only child. The memories I make with her will comfort her when I am gone. Still, I cry. She is expecting her first and most likely only child a boy. I am so sad my Mom didn't get to see him. But life goes on..and as bad as I miss Mom, a new grandchild is coming and a new chapter in my life. Do you honestly think your brother gets how you feel? NO..most guys don't. So honey, you just grieve for your Mom as long as you need to. It is a testimony to the love you had for her. It will subside..but the deep longing for her will not go away. At least mine hasn't. But life is still full of joy. Take Care.....See MoreCan Some of You Help This Grieving Mother?
Comments (8)Syvia, what an incredibly kind and thoughtful thing to do. Same for all of you who took a moment to write to her. I do hope she reads the posts, or if not her, someone else who is suffering. I had no idea so many of you have had sad losses. Hugs to all....See Morealisande
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