Jennifer, when my Grandpa passed I was 17 years old and I took it very, very hard. I was always a good kid with good grades. After that I started to drink and do drugs. I was a real mess for a few years after that. One night I dreamt of him and he shook my hand and said he was alright. I remember the feeling of his big calloused hand in mine. I have been at peace since then, and it has been 28 years since then, but I have been comforted by that dream/vision and have put his passing as a natural progression of Gods will. HE says we won't/can't understand the way HE does things. We just have to accept and one day will find out for ourselves. Now, I am not a religious person as far as church going goes, but I know there is a grand plan and a reason for everything. I hope you take the time you need to get over this tough phase. You will never forget your Mom, but hopefully the hurt will lessen with time and you will have a warm feeling about her in your heart. Your friend, Duane.

it depends on a whole lot of factors- the most important ones are how exhausted/distracted you are - you know how you 'can't sleep' when you're too tired? intuition works the same way, and you can fritz out even a consistent talent with too much stress.

this is all conjecture and personal opinion, but I think that what happens when a person leaves their body is unique to each person, as individual as dreams- and just as hard to predict. part of it is your beliefs, part of it is the circumstances of your death, part of it is what you're really like when no one's watching...

some people make the transition to spirit easily, some struggle through whatever cultural ritual they were raised to expect.

some people shed their bodies like a bad roomate and never look back- some people cling to it so strongly that they 'haunt' themselves for a year or more.

I think most people go through a period not unlike the sleep after a fever has broken, from which they awake with no immediate memory of their own death- and it can take weeks for them to piece things back together (I've heard women say the same about childbirth incidently)

and sometimes- especially in families where old ways run strong, it's not the spirit who 'makes' signs- it's the house fae (a mother's last wish is very often for the protection of her family, and that's a call that carries great power in the ether) who have lived with a family for years, and know what a 'sign' would look like.

I do not believe that any mother who managed to raise a child with enough love that they would be looking for a sign of their spirit could be in any real distress- the universe loves us like children, and wants most for us what we need most for ourselves.

your mother may, at this moment, be lying somewhere recuperating from a long illness- especially if she had been ill. it may take weeks before she believes herself recovered.

she may also be so enthralled by the beauty of her spirit and the world, or so in love with having her wings back that it may slip her mind that you are waiting to hear from her...

patience, a sample of her favorite scent (be it vanilla and cinnamon, or murphy's oil soap) and a the lighting of candles (there isn't a culture in the world that doesn't have SOME ritual based around flame and smoke carrying messages.) can help you feel less helpless in your looking- and can serve as a beacon for your mother, when she has time to turn her attention earth-ward.

Duane and chinacat...you both write so beautifully. Your words have brought me MUCH comfort today and definitely a tear of two. lol Thank you!
It's funny because I was looking online about spirt contacts and visits and what not and I read that the spirit will not visit their loved ones right away if they sense the loved one would be scared or upset by the visit. And I HAD to laugh because my mother knew what a big scardy cat I was and still am and if I ever saw her I'd probably need to change my underpants...lmao
So, I'm going to try to overcome some of that fear and hopefully someday she'll come check up on me to see how I'm doing but even if she doesn't I feel her around me and my love for her won't ever stop growing.

Jennifer, if you do a search on "signs" or "dreams" on this forum, you'll probably find a lot of interesting posts. There have been many, and I'm sure some haven't scrolled off.

I lost my daughter Gillian almost four years ago, and she has proved to be as intelligent, creative, and affectionate in spirit as she was in her body. I continue to have many signs from her, as have several of our friends. But as Chinacat said, not every spirit will act in the same way. My father visited me three times in dreams, my beloved stepmother not at all.

Some signs are not all that dramatic or obvious. Tune in to what you see around you, and I don't mean images of ghosts. You might see the car she drove...over and over, wherever you go. A favorite flower might bloom out of season. An animal might behave in an unusual manner. You might wake up some morning with no recollection of dreaming about your mother, but the unmistakable feeling that the two of you were together. Try to be open to all possibilities.

Susan

I actually think I've had a sign or two. I just don't know if they're really signs or if I'm trying so hard to get a sign that I'm imagining things. lol Does that make sense to anyone?

Of course. My advice is to just take it and be comforted. It's what your mother would want.

Susan

love- look at it this way. if you were 'imagining it', what you were doing was transmitting. That's the only way we CAN send messages to folks with no forwarding address. the whole concept of prayer is based on this principle- the idea of holding an idea, or an image, and offering it up to the universe (or the Divine)

is this a new thing? or is not trusting yourself and your perceptions older than this present crisis? not that we all don't do it, but it seems to be standing in the way of you taking comfort that IS being offered to you.

trust me- if you were NOT having signs- you would feel the absence of them. there would be no 'maybes' about it.