Call me an old fogy, but I don't get the "babies without marriage" that's so common these days.
Depending on how close you are to your cousin, I'd give a gift card for $25 to $50. The young parents I know these days are so picky about what's right for their baby that most anything you buy they'll more than likely return for something they really want. Though you could check to see if they're registered. If so that'll help allot.

Are you planning to attend the shower? Will they have a registry? If you don't attend, a gift card to Buy Buy Baby or Kids R Us.

Is it for a different sex? That seems to be more common. However, if I were throwing a shower for someone who already had a boy and now was having a girl I'd keep it really simple and wouldn't call it a shower. It would be a small gathering with CLOSE family and friends and we'd pitch in and surprise with some clothes and that type of thing.

I usually spend $50. If you're buying items I'd stay away from blankets - I received 13 of them. I also wouldn't purchase stuffed animals, picture frames that say something newborn related, or anything decorative for the nursery.

A few items I feel are practical, I like, and pick from to give are: Triple Paste, Little Remedies Infant Tylenol, Little Remedies Gas Relief Drops, diapers in any size bigger than infant, teething gel, a book, and then I usually pick items off the registry or gift card and add gift receipts.

My go-to shower gift (especially for new mothers) is a copy of the book, Happiest Baby on the Block, and a miracle wrap swaddling blanket (which goes with the book, because that's one of the ways to keep the babies "happiest"). Highly recommended by my daughters.

Shee has a good practical list! My daughter would definitely agree with her list also. Most new moms get too many newborn items and have to go shopping for diapers and clothes at about 2-3 months.

DD is also a big advocate for sleep sacks since blankets in the crib are out due to SIDS precaution. I have found that so many new mothers are not aware or familiar with the sleep sacks.

Two of my three kids were given a Taggie blanket (they are small, more like a toy or, you know, a "lovey" than an actual blanket) and both loved them. I don't know what it is about these Taggies but my DD especially used hers in a variety of ways, including later as a doll blanket, for several years of her life! Again it's not meant to be a blanket in terms of covering up or swaddling a baby -- just something baby can hold onto, chew on, whatever babies do.

Here is a link that might be useful: Taggies

Now why didn't I think of that taggy blanket? When my oldest was a baby she always gravitated towards the silky tags on her blankets. My friends daughter would steal her bras out of the laundry so she could rub the tags on her cheek.

Wow so many great suggestions!

I do plan on attending the shower, and yes she has a gift registry at target, but I like to be a little more thoughtful if possible.

Mother to be doesn't want to know the sex of the baby...her first is a 6 yr old boy.

When I had my kids in the 80's I remember having to go out with all three to buy more crib sheets and mattress pads. Several sets needed for changes from spit up and blowouts(sorry) and if you don't get the laundry done fast enough. So, I will always give these as shower gifts...not glamorous but much needed and used. I like to give both cotton sheets for summer and jersey sheets for winter. I remember getting a ton of clothes and blankets, so I usually do not give these. Another idea I like is a plastic baby tub with tub toys and hooded towels. If this is not a close friend or relative I think $50 is appropriate.

One of the hot items right now seems to be the Swaddle. It is easier to use than wrapping the baby with a blanket burrito-style and it doesn't come loose.

This post was edited by Fun2BHere on Mon, May 19, 14 at 19:16

My answer is the same for all such events

Spend as much as you feel comfortable spending (the "acceptable" range is so wide and varies so much in different circles and regions that I won't even try), but spend it on something on the registry or even a Target giftcard. Supplement it with any small, inexpensive personal gift that strikes your fancy.

One of my aunt's bought me a three pack to a 'Jane of all trades' service. This lovely woman came to my house, cleaned, did my laundry, ran to the market and left my house smelling great and my fridge stocked once a week for my first 3 weeks after birth. It really let me enjoy those weeks.

If the family will spent some summer time at a pool or the beach, one of the cutest gifts my niece received was some swim toys, swim diapers, a swimsuit (it is a girl), small towel, sunglasses, hat, all packaged in a cute beach tote. If that doesn't suit, I would stick to some of the basics mentioned that can be frequently used and augment with a gift card.

I recommend choosing from the registry. Doing so is plenty thoughtful, since there is no more tactful way for a person to state, "This is what I want you to give me, rather than what you want to give me."

I would give a Target gift card + a small present for the 1st child. That, to me, would be very useful and thoughtful.

I agree with Anele.....a little 'because you're special too!' gift for the other child/children.

Now days I would give a couple Swaddle Blankets.
I did this with all my babies using receiving blankets (are they still called receiving blankets these days?) but the Swaddle blanket looks to be so much easier!

Back in the day I would give a month or two (depending how close I was to the mom-to-be) of diaper service or if someone wanted to share the cost/gift, a 3 to 6 months of diaper service.

Also much appreciated; a woven basket with lid that can sit decoratively on a dresser. Create a 'medicine cabinet for baby' and put all items inside the basket. *nail trimmers, several types of thermometers, teething gel, teething rings, diaper rash ointment, etc.*
Keep in mind that some of the young mothers of today (as opposed to 20 - 30 years ago) only use 'natural' remedies for their babies so you will want to ask someone close to the mom-to-be if she only uses natural products and buy accordingly.
I like using several rattles incorporated into the ribbon/bow on top of the basket.

I give books, because I know that some of my most cherished memories are of reading to my kids. I usually pick some of the ones that mine loved--Good Night Moon, Pat the Bunny, any of the Dr. Zeuss picture books, Sandra Boynton board books etc.

Books also are one size fits all, unisex and a bit unique in that not many folks seem to get them as gifts.

As a devoted bibliophile it's my own small way of trying to keep the literary fire burning for the next generation :).

Ann

My go-to baby gift is 6-8 of my children's favorite books from their childhood. The kids write little notes to the baby-what they loved about the books, etc. they are so pretty that I don't usually wrap them, just tie them together with some pretty ribbon.

Check on their registry if they have included the "sleep sheep" , a small furry sheep that attaches to the crib or stands alone, that emits different soothing sounds, white noises really, it's really popular.

* Happiest Baby on the Block DVD--easier for new parents to watch than reading the book.

* The Read-Aloud Handbook (for the parents) and some books for the babies. I like "Fuzzy Bee," by Roger Priddy. It is a soft book with good rhymes. Everyone else will be able to chime in with zilions of good titles.

* The Miracle Blanket. This is a swaddler.

Here is a link that might be useful: The Read-Aloud Handbook

There are mixed opinions on swaddling. Not sure I would do that. Really soft nice baby blankets are something I liked. I still have a couple. I think the kits are nice..

http://www.amazon.com/The-First-Years-American-Healthcare/dp/B000LZI2UE/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1400598499&sr=8-2&keywords=baby+kits

Little noses had the best boogie sucker I found. and it came apart so you could wash it out....
http://www.amazon.com/Little-Noses-Stuffy-Nose-Pack/dp/B005LIEO6M/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1400598574&sr=8-9&keywords=little+noses

http://www.amazon.com/Diaper-Bag-Buddy-Basics-me4kidz/dp/B004LP8TI0/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1400598636&sr=8-6&keywords=diaper+bag+kit

I also really like california baby stuff. Only sunscreen that does not make my kids eyes hurt.

http://www.amazon.com/California-Baby-Basics-Suncare-Starter/dp/B000GZNH7M/ref=sr_1_35?ie=UTF8&qid=1400598888&sr=8-35&keywords=organic+baby+kit

Sophie the Giraffe Teether

Annieâ¦is she going to be nursing the baby? I just made two nursing covers using a Simplicity pattern. There are also tutorials online. Basically a rectangle with strap that goes around the neck and attaches to another tab strap with D rings. The neck has some boning in it to make it stick out a little for Mom to see how baby is doing.

Also made some burp cloths out of really fun fabrics. Both were very much appreciated & are being used. The burp clothes are shaped like a peanutâ¦I bought one & enlarged it a little to use as a pattern.

Sue, I was going to say the same thing! Each baby needs their own Sophie. Annie, look up Sophie and read about it, and you'll see why it's so popular. A little pricey for a teether but I don't know one baby who didn't like her for the first full year.

RE: the nursing cover--very thoughtful but tricky. Some moms strongly dislike them. I nursed 5 babies (2 yrs each, and we nursed anywhere and everywhere) without them. I never, ever wanted one.

Really, I would not give much other than cash or what is on the registry. Otherwise, you run the risk of the gift being unused or regifted. Most moms (esp a 2nd time one) know what they need. Happiest Baby book has been around for a long time, so I am guessing she has it or doesn't want it. She likely has her own way of doing things now. Same for swaddlers. If they are on the registry, great, if not --pass. I bet this shower is happening because it's the dad's first?

Wow, so many wonderful suggestions! Thanks so much!

They have actually requested that instead of giving a card, to give a book for the child. So I'll definitely be giving a book. I think I'll crochet a baby blanket too. I saw one on line that has an extra triangle overlaid on one corner that acts like a hood to keep baby's head warm. Then I just have to choose from all the wonderful suggestions.

You guys are great!

I went to target and bought a couple of crib sheets and some burts bees products she requested off the registry, and I bought a book. I'm in the process of crocheting a baby blanket that will have a corner piece that acts like a hood so it will keep baby's head covered when wrapping him/her up. And I remembered that I'd forgotten to RSVP!! What an air head!!!

I'll try to post a pic of the baby blanket when I'm done with it....

I like to also include a small toy or book for the other child. I have also sent a box of little cars or the like ,that mom can send home from the birthing so they also feel special and not left out from all the new baby stuff.

Reading this has been an education, as none of our adult children is anywhere near marriage or family. None really has any close friends who have children yet either, so this has been a dormant subject for many years for us. Sleep sheep, taggies, sleep sacks.....who knew?? I am glad to see that books are still a gift of choice as well. Justgotta, I am also of the generation that used to assume a child born out of wedlock was a timing slip up and that a marriage would soon ensue. That now seems such a quaint notion, although a stable marriage with two parents still appears to be considered the gold standard by social.workers. I wish there was a shower gift that could guarantee stability and love in every child's home, regardless of the circumstances.

Edited for spelling and punctuation, I shouldn't post in the middle of the night even if I can't sleep :-(

This post was edited by kswl on Fri, May 23, 14 at 8:52

kswl, your last sentiment....would that there were!

kswl I have become VERY educated about the use of sleep sacks with my new (9 months old) granddaughter.

My DD was very paranoid (cautious) about SIDS and kept reminding me no blankets, no bumber pads, no pillows, no stuffed animals in the crib. It was kind of disturbing to me when I would sleep all snuggly in her spare room with a top sheet and a light weight coverlet in the summer because the AC was cool.

As much as I tried to not be bossy and not to interfere, I finally had to remind her that the baby had to be cold with just a sleeper on after she started moving around enough to get the swaddling blanket loose. She knew I was right and remembered that she had received a nice sleep sack for a shower gift. Sleep Sacks are now a Staple in Little C's wardrobe.

And, by the way, apparently swaddling blankets (we used to call them receiving blankets) are OK.

You are right - times sure have changed.

My grandson is 18 months old and still sleeps in a sleep sack over thin pajamas. In a cold room. Only now his sleep sack has feet, lol.

No blankets. We used to use those thick blanket sleepers.

Oh well, my dd is doing such a great job at being a mommy. Who am I to say?

And she is going to make me a granny again on December 8th. Very excited.

Annie, I see you already purchased your gift. But this is a very popular gift among the young moms these days. I've purchased several.

Here is a link that might be useful: Link

BB blocks are a great idea...if I knew sooner, I'd have made some. Somehow $40 for 3 blocks of wood doesn't seem cost effective...

I know. I wish I would have thought of the idea!

Here is another idea Annie. My sis got these for me. My boys love to look at them. mine went through a house fire so the smoke damage faded the color a bit but they were really pretty new. Special gift.

Here is a link that might be useful: Link.

Baby blanket is complete...here's Claire Bear modeling it. It's a square with a triangle in one corner to be used as a hood so baby's head can stay covered.

And I did get a book for her boy. I talked to her and she said he loves to read and is into the Captain Underpants series?!? So I found a book and will wrap it for him.

Thanks everyone for all your suggestions and insights. Not having any children, when it comes to baby things, I'm truly at sea.

That really is beautiful! You are so talented, Annie.

Thanks, Ellendi...I just hope the mommy likes it!

Perfect. You hewed to the registry, which everyone appreciates, but also did something personal and unique, which every giver likes to do and any recipient will appreciate. How sweet.

Captain underpants is fun. The boys in the school turn the principal into a Superhero named Captain Underpants. And yes, he runs around in his underpants. Whatever it takes to get them to read.

The blanket is sweet.

Thanks Mtnrd and redlover...
Yeah, you're right...whatever gets them to read!

I'm loving the monogrammed baby blankets. I would go for a last name initial if a name hasn't been decided. Here's an example.

Here is a link that might be useful: Baby blanket

Nice idea pattycakes, but in this case, I'm not sure of a last name either as the parents are not married....

That is really adorable - I hope the parents appreciate what a wonderful gift a handmade piece is. I know my DIL really had no sentimentality about things that others had made for their baby. In our generation that hooded blanket would become an heirloom piece, passed lovingly to others in the family. I hope it does.

Thank you, olychick. I doubt it will as she doesn't seem like the sentimental type. I'll be happy if she finds it useful for this baby.

very sweet blanket, you're so talented !!

Thanks mitchdesj!

Really lovely and sweet blanket, Annie. Yes, anything handmade is heirloom-worthy and I do hope it is appreciated as such. It is really thoughtful of you.

Thanks, outsideplaying!