If asked, I will tell the waiter the truth - good, bad or indifferent. If they offer to cook me something else, I decline because it messes up the flow of the meal - everyone else will be finished with their entre when mine arrives. Generally they will comp the entre or throw in a dessert.

If they don't ask, the restaurant gets an e-mail from me the next day. Often the higher end restaurants will have you back to eat for free.

If a meal is especially good, I ask the waiter to please go into the kitchen and tell the cook staff that the food was great. And when the waiter is doing really well, I get his or her name and send an e-mail to the manager the next day.

Pretty much what graywings said. If it's good, I give a great compliment (a firm believer there are not enough of those in our world). If not so good I politely tell them what the problem is and find usually that most places are more than accommodating.

Focusing on those star ratings on the internet, I'm a little leery of those. I've seen a few that didn't quite make sense. For instance I looked up a business that had a bunch of 2 or 1 star very unhappy customers. Sprinkled among those were a few glowing, raving 5 stars mentioned people (owners?) by name. Or the only reviews are glowing from friends/relatives because no one else bothers to rate it. Realistically there's nothing stopping any friends or relatives or even owner from posting to offset the negative.

There's a Mexican restaurant here, known for having "the blandest" food in town. It's always packed! We ate there "once". YEP.....bland. It was served in courses. First a taco, then 30 minutes later, an enchilada. Maybe the food served like it's in courses appeals to people? It sure took a long enough time to get a full mexican platter. :0) We said it was fine to the server when asked. It lived up to it's reviews and reputaion. :0) Never went back. (It's NOT the great food bringing people in)

If I didn't like my food, I never said anything. But I began to realize, especially today when restaurants are closing far too often, management needs to know to make any changes necessary to keep customers coming back.

I also tell management when the service is exceptional and the food is good.

How disappointing for you !! I try to look up restaurants by regions at

www.chow.com

it's incredibly active as forums go, and it's well monitored. When we moved to Dallas, I found a wealth of info on restaurants there. In my own home area, I keep on top of new places or some I'd like to try.

If I find the food ordinary, as in not bad but not especially good, I smile and say, it's ok I guess. No one has ever questioned that, I guess they don't want to hear more.

I vote with my wallet, I just don't return ever if I'm less than wowed by a new place I try. I don't take the time to let them know why.

I will always say something if it is really bad, but I do know most restaurants would like to know if you are unhappy (or happy) with food or service. So many go out of business in their first year that I figure they deserve a chance to improve. I worked in a few when I was in graduate school. It helps to do it in a nice way, though. Rude and yelling customers are not taken very seriously. If you don't want to complain to the waiter, you can always ask to see the manager on your way out.

I always let them know -- and they usually send over the manager -- and after more explanations -- some or all of the meal is free OR they offer dessert etc.

Let them know!

((and I always let them know if the bathrooms are not clean or lacking toilet paper etc. Always. LOL! )

Jan

Since the waiter usually comes over right after we've started eating to say "How is everything?"........we also usually say "Fine" even if something's not quite right. Now, by that, I mean, not really good. If the soup isn't hot, yes, I say, the soup isn't hot. If the steak is undercooked, I would say that too. If DH needs A-1, we ask for that. In other words, if the "not really good" is fixable, we say so. If the food is not up to par, we don't. In that situation, I wait till they come to clear and then, I mention that they might want to tell the chef that the salad was wilted, or the meat over-seasoned. I think when the server comes by in the beginning and asks how you are, it's more for checking comfort level. And my comfort level is doing my complaining or commenting when I have control of the conversation and can be kind yet specific, NOT when I have a mouthful of potatoes and they ask "How is everything?"

Red

I think sometimes the help writes those reviews, I've often wondered. I've eaten at upscale restaurants and some were good and some were awful. But if it is pricey or if it is cheap and it tastes terrible, I'm not going back. Or if it's really bad I will say something, for sure.

I ate at a restaurant last night that served fried catfish, coleslaw, hushpuppies, baked pototoe, turnup greens and sweet tea, and it was good and cheap. And had a view of the Tennessee river. Can't beat that with a stick. (lol)

But I enjoy going to fabulous restaurants too but this was wonderful and fattening.

How do you spell pototoe?

.....Jane

Jane, are you channeling Dan Quayle, lol? It's potato and potatoes.

Fortunately I haven't had too many bad experiences. If I do, I say something or write an email afterward. When we ate at Carraba's everything was very salty. When the manager stopped by our table and asked how things were I told him. We've never been back. When we had the same poor service at Coyote Blues on two subsequent visits I wrote to management at both locations. No reply. So that's off the list. Too many good restaurants in town to waste money on those that aren't!

Red, I think in most restaurants they really do want to know before you are finished eating which is why they check with you pretty quickly. It is hard to fix something after someone has eaten her entire meal and most places will happily redo or replace your meal as quickly as possible. I have seen people (granted, this was YEARS ago) who cleaned their plates and then expected the meal to be comped because they didn't like it. I guess I am just saying, go ahead and let them know.

I guess the reasons I really don't say much is: like graywings mentioned, the "flow" of the meal is interupted (you sit there picking at your plate while your mate waits for his to be re-served); it feels "impolite" to criticize others (yes, crazy, I know, it's a business), and like Red mentioned, my mouth is full :). I think I'll do as some of you do, and email this restaurant what I thought of the food. Usually, we just never go back, and tell others who are thinking of dining there.

"And my comfort level is doing my complaining or commenting when I have control of the conversation and can be kind yet specific, NOT when I have a mouthful of potatoes and they ask "How is everything?"

They all do that, and on purpose so you don't have a chance to complain while you're thinking about it and hope you'll forget by the time you pull your wallet out *rolls eyes*

When we spend $$$ at pricey places, we usually end up at places we KNOW we won't be disappointed, we rarely if ever are. We usually don't complain at less expensive venues, afraid of what happens in the kitchen after that :-0 When/if that happens, we vote with our wallet and NEVER go there again.

Cyn..........I've never had a meal comped or asked anyone to do so. (I've had drinks comped when they forgot, or maybe a free dessert when we all got served at different times, but no meal comping.) I just don't usually have my act together enough to make a kind yet specific remark when they first come by....plus, I usually sense that it's just mechanical and they are moving on. My own issues, yes. And honestly, I pretty much always get good food and even better service. The rare occasion with a problem, we usually just let it go.

I will say that when I dined with my DD at a local Bistro/Bakery (very upscale, lunches at about $20) a few years ago, I was surprised that they took our appetizer off our bill but nothing else. There was a fly in my iced tea. I sweetly asked the waitress for another. She brought a new glass. When she came to refill it, she poured in another fly (or the same one???) from the pitcher. I pointed out the fly once again, (hard to do as by this time DD and I were doubled over laughing!) and she almost rolled her eyes at me. Not more than 3 minutes later, the waiter at the next table, a party of 8 Red Hat ladies, dropped a full pottery bowl of salad dressing. Bowl shattered and a shard hit my bare leg, cutting it, and blood ran down my leg. Waiter was horrified and embarrassed, hurried to get me a cloth. One of the ladies gave me a band-aid. (Cut was fairly deep, continued to bleed, seen by waiter as well as whole Red Hat table)
We finished our meal and went to pay. They told us they were comping our appetizer.
If nothing else, it was a funny story to tell my DH when we got home.

Red

Natal, I thought about Dan Quayle when I asked. Thanks! (lol)

Hmm, we live in a small town, known for good food. Catering to tourists, we've only been disappointed a couple of times. Those business's don't ever last around here.

My reaction depends on the price point. Under $15., I consider everything on the menu to be an experiment. Over $25., I voice expectations.

Unfortunately we live in chain restaurant city, so you know what you're going to get no matter what you order. There just aren't too many independents around here.

We have one we go to frequently and it's hit & miss...depending on who is cooking. We've defnitely spoken up and they've comped us before. Once, however, when we had it delivered, DH's food was terrible, so we called and were met with extreme skepticism...like we were trying to get a free meal. He'd ordered one of the more expensive items, and we've eaten there enough (we're part of their rewards program) and we were kind of perturbed that they'd be so weird about DH's meal. We didn't go back for a while because of that, but learned that the previous manager had fnally be fired, so that might have been the reason for the iffy food.

But we ALWAYS speak up at the chains if it's bad. Some places are really good about making it right, others, where DH's food was COLD, our salads were wrong, we didn't get our drinks, the table was filthy and other issues, the server, and manager, basically told us we were being difficult. So needless to say we won't go there again.

When we get great service/food, we always make it a point to tell the staff, all of them, how pleased we are and we bring friends there and do what we can to promote them. Right now, in fact, our paper is doing the annual 'best of' voting, and we always take part in that. Supports the local guys.

I am currently carrying a receipt from Walmart in my purse so I can go back into the store & show the manager. I want to COMPLIMENT the cashier - she was excellent! I was buying a white zip-up sweatshirt type jacket (I get a new one each year, it's just about the only thing I buy at WM). As I approached the conveyor belt the cashier put a bag on top of the belt so my jacket didn't get dirty! My $13 sweatjacket! Then she wrapped the bike lock I was buying in another bag & put in with the jacket - again, so it wouldn't get my cheap jacket dirty! And she was friendly & pleasant. I don't shop there often but she was by far the best experience I've ever had there. So I'm carrying around the receipt in case I get back near there so the manager can see her employee number. I hope she still works there by the time I get back!

As for restaurant food, I will politely speak up if something is wrong. Depending on the problem, sometimes I speak directly to the waiter, sometimes I ask for the manager. Sometimes you know going in that you get what you pay for and any comments would fall on deaf ears. I mostly try to avoid those kinds of places. If I mistakenly eat at one, then I know for the future not to go there again.

It is important to speak up, in a polite way & with reasonable expectations, or the places that do care don't get the chance to make it right.

Deedee, with entree prices like that, I would have spoken up.
Appetizer comes burnt? I would make a little joke to the waiter, like "Oh, a well-done spring roll!" Maybe he/she would then realize that it should go back.

After the meal, maybe you could have asked to talk to the manager: "You know, it was kind of busy in here tonight, but he food was overcooked [or bland or...]--is the regular chef off tonight? We're wondering because we heard some really good things about this restaurant."

And you know something? You should post your own restaurant review--on the site you saw and maybe on Chowhound. Other people can benefit from your experience.

I send things back if something's wrong; I don't think about what the retribution from the kitchen might be--how can you do anything about that?

As an ex-waitress I say speak up! It used to drive me crazy when a customer would wait until the end of the meal (that they had eaten all of) to express their displeasure.

If something is really off, I do speak up. Like some of you my expectations rise with the price and my tolerance lowers in direct proportion.

But my big restaurant pet peeve is being served a salad on a warm plate - nope - it goes back to the kitchen. If they can't chill the plates at the very least have enough dinner service to pull one that's room temp, not straight from the dishwasher.

We usually check Zagat online (when possible) or google the restaurant's comments. DH thinks many are skewed by actual restaurant staff plugging in good comments.

Never send anything back since like others have posted, holds everyone up. If I am asked if I would like to take it home, I tell them no. I think that should be a huge red flag. I've found that in some restaurants they will take the entree off of the bill or send over dessert to the table at no charge.

I've only eaten at very few restaurants where the food was terrible. It does help to try places recommended by friends and family with similar tastes. Also, we do eat at certain restaurants frequently and know the quality of food and service. We're like family since we may eat at a certain restaurant every Saturday nite. They remember our names, we remember theirs, etc. Also helps when you haven't made a reservation ahead, they always manage to find us a seat.

I have a pet peeve about salad served on a warm plate as well.

I've had very few really bad meals but tons of mediocre ones so much so that we don't go out to eat as often as we might like for that reason.
I never complain about mediocrity, after all what can they do? Shut down and start over?
We go to chains sometimes if they seem popular and trendy...went to p.f. changs for the first and last time in Myrtle Beach at Christmas, did lunch there and it was fairly crowded. The atmosphere and service was a joy, the food supremely ordinary.
So we went to lunch the next day at the chinese buffet down the street that had a hibachi grill- cooked to order, you plated the raw ingredients then watched the chef cook it. It was great! The food fresh, interesting and good if not gourmet by any means.

Occasionally we do special meals at local upscale restaurants we know and like and are usually pleased with everything. I wouldn't hesitate to send something back or notify the waiter if something was wrong , but I don't complain about just not liking the way it is seasoned.
If I don't like the table they take us to, I ask for another.