Speaking as a former server (and Chili's employee), the server didn't deserve a tip.

I realize tipping is customary in the US and I know from experience what it's like to have to make a living from tips (although California servers make a heck of a lot more in base pay than in most other states). The server's responsibility is not only to submit an accurate and timely order to the kitchen, but to be the last quality control in place for making sure the food coming out is the right food, cooked correctly and served promptly. If a restaurant uses runners, it is still the primary server's responsibility to follow up on the order.

It used to be that Chili's cook staff had ticket time limit of ten minutes. That means from the time the order printed in the kitchen to the time we called "Order up!" was not to exceed ten minutes. The nearest server or runner was to deliver any order waiting, then the server for that table was to follow up within two minutes of the meal hitting the table. I don't know if that is still true, but there is nothing on their menu that should take as long as you had to wait.

The ice in the drink was not the server's fault UNLESS is was visible from looking at the glass. It's hard sometimes to tell if a burger or steak is cooked correctly; you have to sometimes depend on the kitchen markers, but it's obvious to anyone that a burger is not a plate of ribs. Every ticket has a table number, and so there is no excuse for anyone who picked up the order to deliver it to the wrong table UNLESS the server entered the table number incorrectly. And while the server should not hover or interfere with your conversation, it should never be 20 or 30 minutes before they check on you, even if it's just a visual visit to see if you need refills or napkins.

No, I don't tip for take-out orders. The person handling the transation isn't doing anything special. Being pleasant and polite is part of their job. Well, that's not entirely true: if I have a particularly complicated order that requires them to do a lot of special packaging or other extra work that goes beyond putting the containers in a bag and handing it to me, yeah, I'll tip. We picked up lunches for 15 from a place one time and it had to all be rang up separately. It was a total PITA order, took a lot of time to package and ring up in the middle of a rush, and the cashier was very pleasant in spite of the mayhem we cause. We tipped her.

I wouldn't charge a drink just to leave a tip. Some chains are starting to charge servers the processing fee from electronic transactions on tips.

Totally aside from the tipping issue, honey, you should ALWAYS have some emergency cash on you. You never know what might happen, you card won't work or is lost/stolen, you have a fight with your date and have to get a taxi home, suddenly the CIA is after you and you have to disappear into the wind :-), whatever.

No, I would not have tipped. It was the server's responsibility to see that you got what you ordered no matter what else happend or whose fault it was.

And yes, please start carrying a small amount of cash for emergencies. Five or ten $1.00 bills could make a world of difference in some situations. Personally I would carry more than that. A case in point is today I went to the courthouse to have a deed probated. I didn't expect it to cost more than ten dollars, but for some reason I stuffed more than that in my wallet when I left my vehicle. Imagine my surprise when the bill came to $37.25. They wouldn't take plastic or a check. Luckily I had $1.75 left over. If I had not had the cash I would have had to go back another day and hunt down the scarce parking places and waste more time.

Good point coleen....Mad money. When Iw as young and dating, every evening purse had a $10 bill in the pocket.
And when I got older and was dating again...it was a $20!

The first situation - I wouldn't have tipped. Actually I wouldn't have stuck around long enough to eat or face that decision, but that's another story.

Two years ago - I would have tipped. They realized their mistake and made it right.

Take-out - We've discussed this before; here's my take on it. Not as much, but I tip. The order was taken, prepared, and served (in a bag). Keep in mind that a lot of times these are bartenders and waitstaff who are working the take-out orders. The difference is they didn't have to come back to refill my drink and offer me coffee and dessert, and the bus boy didn't have to clean the table. So yes, a tip for service, but less of a tip than if I had gotten full service.

Beanthere said it best. There is no way I would have tipped. And like FOAS said, it's doubtful I would have even still been there at that point.

Chili's started out as a privately owned restaurant with a unique menu and great service. But just like so many other successful businesses, they sold out to a big corporation. And they went from being unique and really good to typical, bland and careless. The last time I went there was the first time I'd been in years and it reminded me of why I never go there anymore. Bad service and bad food. And that location went out of business shortly afterward.

I tip on service. When I get good service, I tip around 20%. If I get exceptional service, I tip more. If I get bad service, the tip drops dramatically. Since I get good service 80-90% of the times I eat out, that means it's not only possible, it's a reasonable expectation. So, when I get bad service, I figure there's just no excuse. I don't care if the guy admitted he was wrong. Everyone knew he was wrong, including the manager who comped your meal.

When I make a mistake at work, no one pats me on the back and says, "good job!". Yes, I admit my mistakes and I fix them. I'm human and I'm forgiven. But certainly I'm not praised for them!

Bobby, I wouldn't feel bad. I'm pretty sure that server wouldn't have been expecting anything out of you after the series of mistakes he made.

But, from another perspective. My best friend was a server for years. During some hard times, she was working at a little family restaurant where the tips were not great. On one particularly bleak evening, her section was slammed and she was making several mistakes, and was getting increasingly flustered throughout the evening. She knew she had left one family in particular, waiting a very long time, and apologized to them repeatedly. After they left and she picked up the billfold with their credit card receipt, she found that they had tipped her $100 on a $40 bill. She said she went into the restroom and broke down in tears. It was the gesture, more than the money that touched her.

susy, it restores your faith in humankind, sometimes, doesn't it?

I wouldn't have stiffed the server, probably, I had the bar/restaurant for too long to do that comfortably, I know how they rely on their tips but I agree, the server didn't earn a tip and I wouldn't feel badly about not leaving one.

As for to-go orders, I usually tip just a couple of bucks, certainly not 20% of the bill like I usually do for orders eaten in. I figure they had to at least bag up the order, so I give them a token amount.

As for mad money, there's a big distinction between areas, or maybe just income. When I was in high school I always had mad money. 20 cents. I wore "penny loafers" and there was a dime in each one. A pay phone cost a dime a call and Grandma told me it was "mad" money so if I got mad and ditched my date I could at least call for a ride home.

I'm laughing at the $20, I always had 20 cents, LOLOLOL.

Now I have $5 in my wallet, always. It'll get me a cup of coffee or a cold drink or a snack, but not much else. It drives Elery nuts but I don't usually go anywhere outside of White Cloud unless I'm with him. When I go to Peppi's or Nancy's, any longer distances then I take cash, but never have much on a daily basis.

Heck, I was broke for so many years that now I'm tickled to be able to buy a $3 cup of coffee if it suits me. Yeah, I'm a cheap date, and I still feel guilty over that $3 coffee, most times I'll just go home and make some there. (grin)

Annie

AHHHHHHHH Tipping...always do always will! I have waiters and waitress in my family and they break there A@# all day long and deal with very obnoxious people. If the server is rude thats a different story but apologetic gets a tip...Sometimes there just having a bad day or the cooking line are being jerks! I to tip car to go service too...hey everyones gotta make a living.

Last weekend my husband and I went out for breakfast to a little place down the street that we go to frequently. It was slammed this particular Sunday morning. The poor waitress was so frazzled looking.

After waiting 50 minutes for my breakfast sandwich, it arrived with raw bacon on it. I almost took the bacon off and just ate the sandwich without it but I really wanted that bacon! So I flagged the poor girl down and I apologized for sending back my breakfast! ahaha! I just felt awful for her as busy as she was to have to return the food that had finally come out. Anyway, I hope the kitchen didn't molest my food oranything..... it came back with crispy bacon on it and all ended well.

Yes we tipped; even though TIPS stands for To Insure Prompt Service, it wasnt HER fault. It was the kitchen's fault.

Later that same evening, I went to the grocery store and who did I run into? Our waitress. She apologized again for my bacon being raw. And we stood there talking about how crazy the restaurant was.

Moral to my story Bobby, I'm glad we didn't stiff that girl. I would have been mortified to run into her in the store later that same day.

Now if she had been rude.. that's a whole nuther ball game.

I tip no matter what, however I am more inclined to give a smaller tip if the service really sucked. Having been a waitress myself, I know that it's not always the server's fault when things go wrong, so why should they suffer.

However, if you had no cash, what could you do? The server got $2, so that's that. And yes, it's always a good idea to have a few bucks in your pocket.

Even if I go out for a walk, I stick a $5 in my pocket. It's also fun to find that $5 in my coat pocket or in the washer later!

I still would have tipped something. You don't know what happened in the kitchen, and the server took the blame. (The server's not in charge of the restroom design.) It's not too late--go back and leave a tip.

TIPS doesn't stand for anything--that's a false entomology.

Naw, I wouldn't tip the server for getting my order completely wrong. No matter what happened in the kitchen, the server served the wrong order. I believe that tipping something for terrible service only supports people who expect entitlements. (There is WAY TOO MUCH of that these days. Tips should be incentive, not entitled.) The only service provided in this instance was poor service. Sorry, but no one is entitled to any kind of tip for that!

OK, I went back and read what happened again. I see the server made a mistake for which they apologized. In that instance, I completely understand making a mistake, apologizing and taking responsibility for what happened. Yes, in that instance I would tip the server. Actually, a two dollar tip was probably appropriate for the circumstance.

I do not think a server should receive a tip for poor service however, no matter what.

This is a good reminder to keep a few smaller bills with my mad money. (I keep mad money in my purse and my car.) In fact, just the other day, I also included a couple of quarters ''just in case''. I guess that assumes I'd be able to find a pay-phone if I needed one, which has gone the way of rotary phones!

Gee, I always have a $50 tucked way in the inside pocket of my wallet. I never know where I might be and not everywhere here takes cards.
Um, "entomology" is the study of insects. I think "etymology" is the word which fits best in this discussion.

I'm a pity tipper. I would have left a tip.

ideefixe - Hey I never got that memo! I'm always the last to know these things!!!

Colleen thanks for clarifying that (etymology)...... made me smile.

If I have a twenty stashed away...I'll spend it. I'm lucky to manage to keep a quarter in the car for Aldi's.
Anyway, it's never been a problem for me to use a debit card everywhere or check.

Colleen, $50? Oh no, if I had $50, Ashley would have $50 soon and I'd be broke again. I keep as little cash as possible, so she doesn't ask for any! (grin)

Annie

Eileen, I love your description of being a ''pity tipper''. Thanks for the grin!

I would have tipped. Not a huge amount, but the minimum. So the server had a bad night, it happens. It was probably compounded by the kitchen. Also, I think I would be embarassed to go there again had I not tipped.
But, I agree with others who have said rudeness deserves no tip.
jo

I guess in your situation, leaving the cash you had was all you could do. However, I also strongly believe in keeping cash for emergencies - and also keep the gas tank above half full. We were taught to do this in case of earthquake. After an earthquake, everything is on a cash basis, and gas stations probably will not be able to pump gas. You might have a similar situation with a hurricane. When I was younger, however, I was less concerned about catastrophes.

Lars

My son worked restaurants and bars for a long time. He always said that bad service or food deserve no tips. Even though the server may not be the cook or bartender, tips are generally pooled with certain percentages allocated to the various jobs.

Having said that, because he worked the food and bar industry for so long I too am a pity tipper!

Bobby, about the cash...always have at least $50 in your wallet...always. So many things can go wrong, from weather, to car, to debit /credit card machines that don't work. Or even some poor soul on the street that you feel a need to help. Cash is king.

I don't know about now, but Chili's used to be a good company to work for as far as restaurants go.

Shaun, if it makes you feel better, I've worked in a lot of restaurants, both as a server and as a cook, and I have never seen anyone in a kitchen do anything to sabotage a customer's food. There's just no time for that sort of thing on a cook line.

I keep my emergency cash all folded up in a back pocket of the wallet where its presence is not obvious. Out of sight is out of mind. So it can lurk there for months before I may need to use it. As soon as possible, it gets replaced.

beanthere - thanks, that makes me feel better. I always worry about that.

Funny about this post coming now. We just returned from Denny's for breakfast. The mother of one of my former students is a cook there and has been for years, her son is now in 8th grade I think. Since I order from the senior menu, its supposed to be one egg, one slice bacin, etc. When she is there, the portions always come out bigger than when she's not. Now I am sure its not just for us that it happens. Sometimes I am sure she doesn't see us come in and I never make a point of trying to get her attention. Today, the place was really busy. We got a table where I could see her. She was moving as fast as she could. When the breakfast came out, the portions were large and right. We tipped the waitress as always, service was good. I slipped the waitress a $5.00 and asked her to give it to the cook, _____ mom. She seemed pleasantly surprised. Anyway, its the first time I have thought to do it and probably won't do it each time but I hope it makes the cook feel good that someone appreaciates them. BTW, her son was something else in the classroom but everytime I see him in a store with his family, he runs up to give me a hug!

I know this isn't answering the question and I'm not trying to hijack this thread,but I have a "can you believe this" story and would really like some input on the situation.

I used to frequent a little private eatery where you do "walk up" ordering and then someone will bring the food out to you when it is ready. It is a chicken salad/quiche/sandwich place really and was one of the best I've ever been to. One of the ladies who would bring the food out was really nice, probably in her early to mid seventies and so arthritic that she had a difficult time getting around. All she did was bring the food out, but I always left her a nice tip and yes, I guess a little of it was pity. Then I found out that the scoundrel of an owner was taking her tips from her and telling people that he paid her enough that she didn't need the tips. Needless to say he pays her a very minimum wage and the place is only open for lunch five days a week, so she can't get many hours. Can you believe a person would take tips away from someone?!!? Is there someplace I can report this abuse? Isn't what he is doing illegal? Then again I thought she probably needed this job very badly or she wouldn't be working and if I reported it she most surely would be fired.

A few years ago when my daughter was in the Air Force and home on leave, she and her younger brother went to a local restaurant for lunch. The waitress seated them and took their order. When the food came out, the waitress catered more to my son than my daughter, bringing my son replacement drinks when his glass got 3/4 empty, she did not replenish my daughter's drink for the entire time they were there. Every question of them that was asked by the waitress was directed to my son. My daughter was the one paying for the meal. She did not tip the waitress for those reasons.

In busy places I will often hand cash tips directly to the server just so I know they have it.