usually most graduation parties are like a open house, where people come and go (or like us have double parties to attend)...i'd use some throw-away sterno heaters, and an iced tray and have everything ready, including the usual cake. use dental floss to cut it without "messing" the design too much... i'm so hungry right now i'd love to have your anniversary brunch! add a tray of mini-muffins, or small bagels and whipped cream cheese. that should help anyone with a egg intolerance...it might be easier to serve mini juices (costco or sams) keep them on ice in a tub...

Congrats! There seems t be a lot of sweet stuff, and because I have a more savourytooth, I'm adding a recipe for cheese scones. They freeze and re-heat really well and will give you some protein! Ingredients Serves: 8 200g/7 oz self raising flour 1/4 tsp salt 1/2 tsp mustard powder 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper 40g/1 1/2 oz butter 60g/2 oz grated strong Cheddar cheese 100ml (3 1/2 fl oz) milk Method Prep:15min ⺠Cook:10min ⺠Ready in:25min Heat oven to 220 degrees C / gas mark 7 and lightly grease a baking tray. Sift flour, mustard powder, cayenne pepper and salt into a mixing bowl. Cut the butter into small pieces and add to flour. Rub the butter into the flour with fingertips until the mixture resembles fine breadcrumbs. Stir in grated cheese. Add the milk gradually, stirring well with a knife until the mixture begins to stick together. With your hands, knead the mixture gently to form a soft smooth dough. On a floured surface flatten or roll the dough to about 3cm thick round. Use a 5cm round cutter to cut out individual scones. Place scones on the greased baking tray. Brush with milk and sprinkle some extra cheese on top. Cook for about 10-15 mins until golden. Cool slightly before serving.

gbsim, you've cast the deciding vote! Thanks to you and lindac and Annie for relieving my 'guilt' over the whole dessert question. :) Guess my instincts were right but I was just afraid to trust them. My preference is also for 'plain' fruit, but I was worried that it would seem blah to everyone else. From your comments, I guess not. Teresa, something you said about that gave me a brainstorm. I have several dozen antique crystal champagne glasses that are really lovely. They're not 'flutes', so maybe they're not even champagnes, even though that's what my mother always called them. Anyway, they're wide-mouthed and shallow bowls on elegant long stems. I'm going to fill them with a colorful mix of grapes, melons and berries. They'll be on a separate 'dessert' table, along with an optional whipped topping of cream cheese, sour cream, sugar and Grand Marnier and some simple (but luscious) shortbread cookies. Omigosh, y'all have inspired me! Teresa, it's in Nov. Sounds so far away, but 4 months ahead isn't too early to begin planning, right? The weather here is incredibly unpredictable at that time of year. More often than not, it's really gorgeous between Halloween and Thanksgiving. Indian summer. But sometimes it turns nasty. I'm trying to think positive! I have also worried about the carb overload. But, hey, Michael Bloomberg isn't invited, so we should be safe. mjrdolfan, thanks for your good wishes! She's a lovely and *appreciative* bride, so it's my pleasure to do something special for her. I so understand your concern. But that's exactly why I posted here -- because I know how easy it is to get sucked in and end up leaving too much to do at the last minute and have it all go to hell in a handbasket. I promise that won't happen. You didn't 'throw a wrench' into it at all. You just reminded me, once again, how important it is to be on top of things. Thanks! sm P.S. Grace, forget the mimosas? Do you think I've totally lost it, honey chile??? :) Actually, the Bloody Mary's are what I'm famous for. Horseradish is my secret ingredient. But I've already put one of my ddil's in charge of the mimosas. And another is making bellinis. And a third is squeezing fresh orange juice. It's gonna be a partay!!

While it is certainly true that in many communities, only the bridal party and close family are included in the rehearsal dinner, in others, it is customary to invite people who have traveled from out of town. It is in mine. We call the dinner the night before a "rehearsal dinner," but it rarely has anything to do with a rehearsal. It's usually a much more casual event with everyone who traveled from out of town and usually local family (because many of the out of town guests are family, too)and also very close local friends who helped in major ways (hosting a shower, for example). Because the tone is so different, even if it's almost the whole group, it doesn't feel like two weddings. As you point out, in a destination wedding, everyone has traveled. And you are talking about international travel. So unless you mean something like 25 miles across the Canadian or Mexican border, your guests are going to be spending some major money and time to attend this wedding. I have to admit that if I were one of your guests and you felt I was inner-circle enough to ask me to go to that much trouble and expense from my end but not inner-circle enough to include me for a meal the night before, I'd find it really strange and frankly rather inhospitable. Furthermore, you say that "of the 70 or some coming to the wedding, many of which includes the bridal party and relatives, I'd hate to leave out people and have them feel excluded." So how many are you figuring on not including? If you have 70 total and include 45 and exclude 35 the night before, you really have an A and B list situation, in my opinion. I would include everyone even if it were 10 and 60, not 45 and 35, but definitely in the latter situation. I mean, you say you don't want them to "feel excluded" -- well, they ARE being excluded. I don't think you can have it both ways, and you certainly can't prevent them from feeling what they will feel. Now, your group may find the concept of anyone other than the bridal party being at the rehearsal dinner so foreign that they would be surprised if they were included (although the fact that you are worrying about this makes me suspect that that isn't so certainly the case). Plus, as you note, some may not even be there yet even if they do know they are invited to the rehearsal dinner, too. As to the liquor, I wouldn't do anything like tickets or a cash bar. Provide only what you can afford and want to provide, but whatever you provide, host with an open hand. Bottles of wine or pitchers of beer or lemonade on the tables is perfectly fine -- you absolutely don't have to have a full bar.