Here ya go Tracy- these are easy and YUMMY 2 C all purp. flour 1 T baking powder 1 t salt 1/4 t baking soda 6 T unsalted butter chilled 1 C buttermilk Sift dry ingredients into bowl, add butter and mix with fingers til it looks like coarse crumbs. Stir in buttermilk til dough comes together, (DONT overwork dough) Dust surface with flour and turn dough out and pat to a 1/2" thickness. Cut biscuits with a 2" cutter, place 1" apart on ungreased baking sheet. Bake at 425 til golden on top and lightly brown on bottom (about 12 minutes) makes 12 YUMMY biscuits

i am a caregiver for the elderly,i have been since the early 1980's.my first reason was, i was caring for my husbands uncle who's children wanted to put him in a NH when they found out he had terminal cancer.this man gave to his children,when they needed money they knew when and where to go,and of course this gentle man never complained and always said good things about them.i being only the neice-in-law to this man became close to him,and as he was dying in a coma i heard one of the brothers say,he always yhought of me as his daughter because he only had boys.after that experience i thought to myself i could get paid for doing work like this, i only have to become certified.and i did,throughout the years and experiences i have had even with my husband and children involved in one particular job(alzheimers),one of my hardest jobs.my kids were young and all a part of the care routine.they are grown up now with their own children and are good kids,and are always willing to help an older person in need which to most kids these days don't give an elerly person the time of day.i remember being in a grocery store and there was this little old frail lady trying to get someone, anyones attention to reach and get something on a higher shelf she could not get herself,and you would not believe how many i watched either paid no mind or just shrugged away.whats the matter with most of us???? these are our elders,,they are good story tellers if only people will sit down and listen.we all have a past to be able to have a future,and who gives us that chance????.i am trying to be brief about this and it seems that i could go on and on. anyhow i have been on this one job for approx.7 1/2 yrs. another alzheimers patient,and my experiences on the last several years is somewhat pretty dramatic.to see what this old person is going through with all of the inside bickkering within the family. i study this old person facial expressions and what i see from what i hear from the squabblings makes me wonder,how much does this person really understand and is only not able to communicate with words that can be understood????.we need to pay attention and be careful what we say.this job i was going to leave and did go on another job interview,but when i thought of the reason i was going to have to give was better pay.....thats when i realized that i was going to tough this job out even though it is very stressful for me....i didn't go on another job interview for more money,i guess i just wanred a break...i say to each his own every family situation is differnt and some good people who care more about this elderly people than the money could maybe work someting out with such families as to where these elderly people don't get sent to these homes and can remain in teir own homes...i know it's psossible because one of my jobs i compromised with the family and got paid a certain amount of money,no matter if i worked 80 hours or 10 hours.and i do have my husband to thank for this he stood behind me on whatever i decided,worked at his own job then helped out with other things when he could...i guess you can say god sent an angel 30 yrs. ago to me and i married him!!!!ha ha my apologies for the words that are mis spelled,i am tired but thought i should post this,i am new in here by the way....

BY your own words, the requirement that only one parent has the right to sign permission forms is not in the custody order. What you are attempting to have enforced is your interpretation of what the custody order should say. If it doesnt say that specifically, then legally, the school can accept a permission form signed by either parent, since you have joint legal custody. This, of course, is why you seem like the angry controlling person who feels her toes are stepped on. Its not a big deal when I read about it, and I doubt that it is a big deal to the school. THe only way it becomes a problem for them is when you, the stepmom, call up complaining about something that is perfectly legal for them to do. If I were the teacher, I would think you are a whining troublemaker, particularly since the real mom is a volunteer at the school and very involved in the childs life. In short, what I am trying to say is that I think your attitude makes the animosity between your husband and his ex worse, not better. I think you egg it on to an extent. ANd, for the sake of a six year old girl, and for the sake of your own marriage, you are going to need to get a grip on it. Being a step mom is like raising teens. DOnt sweat the small stuff. This definitely is in the small stuff category. WImom and cawfee, dont you just WISH your stepchildrens real moms were half as involved as this real mom is? There isnt anything to complain about here. Both parents are trying to stay active in the childs life. Stepmom in this case shouldnt be stirring up angry sentiments. Oh, I just came back from teacher interviews this evening with my birth sons teachers. I was there, AND his stepfather was there. His real father did a phone interview earlier today. My sons real father has no problem with my husband going to school interviews, since my son lives with us full time, and visits with his real dad. BUT if my ex had a problem, I would have gone myself and discussed what the teacher said at home later with my husband. Also, for what its worth, my husband always checks that its not an issue before he gets involved, as I check before I get involved in areas such as schooling with his children. Its not easy, but someone has to take the high road. If you dont react to little things, if you put the kid first instead of your pride, you find that it becomes much easier in time, and the children do much better. I cant imagine the six year old in this situation, confused about who gets a form and why anyone would be angry about it. Its ALWAYS easier to be angry and blame the other person, than to be placid and accomodating with people you dont like. IN the long run, its worth it .

Thanks for posting out in the main forum, I wish that other thread would go away forever... The baby is asleep, so I'll go through bit by bit until I get tired or the baby wakes up. "my stepdaughter has ADD, a really hard case," I came into my stepson's life when he was 8. He has very severe ADHD, ODD and may be bipolar; I think he may also have an auditory processing disorder. 8yos with ADD are tough, but I swear it gets better! "y wife and I both get really impatient but I notice that my wife is very easy going with her" ADD also requires ENDLESS patience. It's really difficult. But one key is to pick your battles. If they're able to hold a pleasant conversation, but have to be hopping on one foot and holding a spatula to do it, well... "the girl is pretty much of a big liar, fights with her little brother a lot, has some pretty rough games with her barbies and other toys," With lying and fighting, ADD kids don't have the foresight or hindsight to see the possible outcomes of their action. Their brains are absolutely hell-bent on instant gratification, and our job as their loving adults is to help them learn the skills of foresight and hindsight. "never cleans or organizes her bedroom, she's a very dirty girl, barely eats and whatever she eats she takes stuff out of the food/plate, but she gets tons of toys from everyone and everyone believes in her lies and all" Hygiene issues are probably best dealt with by mom... But, does she actually KNOW how to keep herself clean? My SS is 12 now and we're still telling him "Wash your hands. With soap. Sing Happy Birthday. Make sure you get your nails, between your fingers, and your wrists too, instead of just the fronts and backs!" When he was 9 and I had to talk to him about HOW to wipe his bum because he honestly didn't know how. "and I consider her a tomboy and honestly everything she does pisses me off," Does being a tomboy matter? I think I'll be grateful if my 1yo DD prefers trucks to high heels at age 8! "and to make things worse, she looks eeeexactly like her dad, the guy is a complete ass*** and both are exactly the same, the guy also has ADD, and physically, both look very alike." This one you just have to get over. She can't control who her dad is. "I really try my best to get along with her, give her advises, etc, I just really try my best, but for she misbehaves terrible every single day, without exageration," If you're open to how change in your family can begin with YOU, I can give you about a million ideas, coping strategies, tips and tools. But, if you are really honest with yourself, are you ready to change? It's OK if you're not ready - it's human to resist change, and you can come back to this when you do feel ready. "there's never been a day that she's behaved perfect, even at school, her school teachers can't stand her, so we took her to a psychologist and a child psychiatrist and she's on a med to make her just focus and be calmed," Back the truck up! Meds don't MAKE kids focus and be calm. Meds facilitate the KID's own ability to focus and be calm. Honestly, my SS can be unpleasant to be around without his meds too. But it's HIM being pleasant with his meds, not his meds being pleasant. I know I sound totally pedantic about semantics here, but it honestly does matter - it's a mindshift about how you approach your family. Can you start smaller for her? How about aiming for a good ten-minute drive to Grandma's house? Then a good supper? Then a good HOUR? Then a good afternoon? The ADD child's brain can't handle the abstract concept of "being good" for the incredibly long period of "an entire day." I'll elaborate if you're open. "but when she's not medicated, noone can stand her, my wife although she's easy on her, can't stand her much but she doesn't know that I've grown to hate this girl." There have been times where I've felt little to no LIKE for my SS. And there are times when loving him is hard. He can make me totally crazy. I sometimes feel like he's a disruption to my nice little nuclear family. I sometimes feel like he's being a jacka$$ to spite me. But he's a kid and he needs to be loved. If I expect the worst, he will give the worst. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. So every day, I get up and choose to love my SS. It took me a long time to get back there though (we started off well, took a bad turn, and are good now). "I feel terrible for that but I don't know what else to do, am I just hysteric? is it because I'm not the real dad?" It IS harder to love a child that isn't yours. Honestly, I don't love SS in the same way I love DD. But your SD needs her own niche in your heart. You're not hysteric or crazy or evil. You sound as if you're at your wits' end though and are pretty desperate. "I pretty much took over this family since my wife used to have a crappy life with her ex and the level these kids are at right now was pretty much an upgrade," I'm glad you were able to help with the status of the family! That shows that there's hope! "and I'm always a nice guy most of the time, but I telecommute and feel like resigning to it and going back to the office cause the kids never listen to me," Would it help? Would the issues still exist when you came home from the office? Would it be worse? Would it be a solution or just an escape? "their mom, although tells them to listen to me, they barely do or only listen to me when it provides them some type of benefit, so if I tell them to pick up their clothes and take it to the laundry room, ask me back if they do. They never go to bed on time, even my wife tells them to go to bed a thousand times and never do, we send'em to bed from 8 pm and it's 11 pm and they are still around, it's pretty stressful," Well, that's the first issue! Coparents need to be on the same page. Mom needs to step up and say "Wait a minute! I'm the mom and my family will treat one another with respect." And then she needs to make the expectations 100% clear to the kids, and STICK with it. If you and your wife are up to it, this forum can certainly help you. But it's a real commitment. "even with the food, we buy tons of food for the whole month and they pretty much consume even my stuff, so they don't have the lunch their served but take everything behind our backs, cookies, cheese, juice, coca cola (I wish they tool a tomatoe instead, haha)" We give my SS a container each week with his junk food in it. That's what he gets for the week. End of story. If he eats it all in 24 hours, well, tough cookies for the next six days. We made this clear to him and he's usually fairly able to abide by it. Also, just don't buy what you don't want them to eat! "so anyways, I don't have any kids of my own, I just took this torch and became their dad, the guy is not the best father figure either way and these kids got so used for what it seems, to their new way of life at a much better house, car ride and stuff, instead of what their real dad gives them, bus ride, guy lives with his mother, didn't even finish high school." Please try not to say anything disparaging about their dad to them. It's great that you're trying to be a good dad to them, but they may feel torn. They may want to be kind to you, but feel like their betraying their dad who's down on his luck, KWIM? Anyhow, if you're willing to make major changes, I'm willing to use my tiny scraps of free time to help you!