We had to get rid of our "Mme. Isaac Pereire" because it defoliated from disease in Richmond, Ca along with its pink sport "Mme. Ernst Calvat" grown in Oakland, ca which I had bought for its' intense fragrance. M.I.P is one of the most fragrant roses on earth, but there are others equally as fragrant and much healthier when grown in the East Bay. I've been documenting roses that bloom well in no-spray and organic method gardens in the san francisco east bay in both public and private gardens for the last 10 years. Healthiest red roses out of dozens of Old Red roses evaluated in the s.f. east bay: Francis Dubruiel" FFFF out of five F's for fragrance. several old rose nurseries sell this rose which has an intense damask rose type scent, the type of scent which one expects from a red rose. "Crimson GLory" FFFFF out of five F's. shapely red roses that are deeply fragrant. I found this on the property I bought last year and have never needed to spray it with anything. Slightly less fragrant but still very fragrant, and just as healthy in this area, is "Etoille de Hollande" a red rose that appears to enjoy a large fan and enthusiastic fan base. a modern H.T. from the 1960's: "Papa Meilland" huge goblet shaped crimson roses that fade with purple on the edges. I find myself singing that old Joni Mitchell song to it..."I could drink a case of you" for its perfume is so very intoxicating. A must for collectors of fragrant red H.T.s.. if vintagegardens.com and roguevalleyroses.com doesn't have these roses in stock, I'd try hortico.com or pickeringnurseries.com in the winter for bare root plants. Caveat Rosa: "Gruss an Teplitz" became defoliated in two local gardens in Richmond and Emeryville and both rosebushes were destroyed. "Chyrsler Imperial" was destroyed after becoming defoliated from disease in my neighbors garden. two other roses I had to get rid of because they were coated with disease, were "Monsieur Boncenne" a red H.P., and "Rose des Rescht" both of these roses were coated with rust and defoliated. Both were unsightly and sadly useless because a rosebush cannot bloom without foliage to allow photosynthesis. Hope this is of help. Lux.

I think even if you share a household, you need to learn some boundaries. To protect yourself, mostly. But also because it's right. True, your mom is too "lazy" to make those albums. But maybe that's just a pipe dream; maybe she thinks she "ought" to put photos in albums, and just can't admit that she doesn't really WANT to. That's often behind people's laziness--the fact that the benefits of that thing are just not apparent. If people don't do something, I believe it's because they don't genuinely WANT to. No matter what their mouth says. (and frankly, there is NO empirical benefit to putting photos in albums w/ fancy paper and stickers. The fancy paper and stickers are make-work, and should be done only by those people who get some sort of artistic satisfaction out of doing it. Your mom obviously doesn't get enough satisfaction to bother with it. She's ALLOWED not to want to actually follow through on her albums. Of course it would be nice if she could be honest with herself and say, "I'm content w/ these photos in boxes, and I'm going to stop kidding myself that I'll really make albums," and then toss the excess scrapbooking stuff. But having only recently been through that process, I can tell you that it's not an easy one. It involves creating an entirely new self-image.) I think you need to stop taking responsibility for "fixing" your mom--whether she's morally deficient ("irresponsible and immature") or ill ("psychological disorder"). You *can't* fix her. She's a grownup, and if she's going to change, it will be only because she wants to. You can't even make her go to a psychiatrist to see if medications would help her (say, if she has OCD), because she is NOT your legal dependent. I think you need to just NOT focus on her, and her stuff. No more going "room to room" and making lists of all the ways she is deficient. I know you live there, but it's not your space. Focus your energy on getting out, and on making your life be what you want. Try to maintain calm and order in the places where it affects you, and then, regarding all else, close your eyes, stick your fingers in your ears, and say "la, la, la!" Try to have your own life settled so that if you *need* to "be there" for your little sisters, you can, but don't take on that responsibility too rapidly. A 17-year-old can watch over a 12-year-old, and your dad is part of the family too. Few people have actually died because the corners of the living room are stacked full of out-of-date textbooks, etc. Also, you need to spend some energy, not on fixing things in your parents' marriage, but on getting OUT from "in between." Stop taking ANYBODY's side in any of their disputes or problem. LEAVE THE ROOM! I'm not trying to be snippy. I'm just trying to make you see that you are reaching beyond where you ought to. And your basic assumption--that *you* need to "fix" all these problems in your parents' lives--is wrong. You need to "declutter" that assumption--toss it in the garbage. That assumption is YOUR equivalent of old issues of magazines, etc. You can't fix those problems. So stop trying to. You'll find it amazingly freeing.

Thanks for the plan ML...I did miss it. I printed them out. They are very, very helpful. My husband knew how to enlarge them, and I'm going to cut them out. I can then move them around like puzzle pieces. I sent the designer a rather scathing e-mail. When I get REALLY ticked off, my mind clarifies. Basically, I said that my detailed lists, and what had been said at our meeting had obviously not been read or listened to, like everyone else I have paid. I also said that I would not tolerate any further disrespect. No reply so far. The guy is not someone I want doing our final drawings and blueprints, so my DH can do that with his software, and said he is going to work on it after mowing today. He sure likes our little tractor. Maybe we will get something usable on the floor plan from the designer, but I seriously doubt it. This is a guy who says to me when I was trying to decide on logs versus log siding, or loft or no loft, will say "Oh, so we're back to that again", rather sarcastically. I made a huge point in my e-mail today that it was MY house paid with money earned by my husband and I. I could just spit nails right now. Middle age is a blessing in that one ceases to care about what someone else, who is trying to push them around, thinks. I am starting to draw out a floor plan with a second story loft. The stairs will run along the bedroom wall in the great room. I'm thinking the second bathroom can run between the bedroom wall and stairway, accessable to both the master and great room. Maybe it will work...don't know yet. I'm hoping it would be private enough. An extra bedroom WIC could sit next to that along the same wall area. Sort of like building rooms back to back with the bedroom. The "study" could be turned into a nice foyer, not as large, with the laundry access off that. There could be a door from the master bathroom into the laundry room as well. These ideas, combined with the space that stairs take up, will create a hall, with privacy gained into the bedroom. The foyer can be a spot for my large roll top desk, which would be awful to get up into a loft, and a nice bench or chair, so as not to be wasted "show" space. The beautiful door with leaded glass and sidelights would really set this area off. I would also like to see an access point from the foyer into the kitchen. There will still be another kitchen door somewhere so we can go outside to the porch, and also grill, maybe between the dining area and counter run. I'll try to post here later. The kitchen will be reworked from how he did it, but the basic concept of it and dining running the direction they are. I can pivcture storage closets with a window seat on the front east wall of the kitchen. Maybe that's where the access from the foyer can cut in to run along that wall. At least my ideas are starting to flow again. Does any of the above make any sense? Hard sometimes to see it with just a bunch of words. I think we can come up with enough to satisfy the county, (and me), so we can get started, with small "remodels" made as we build. I guess I had to get good and P.O.'d. It sure does make it easier taking the sewing room off the main floor. It makes for a nice plan that isn't boxed in. The other good point is that even though we do not care about resale and are out to please only us, the loft makes the home versatile for resale when we finally kick the bucket. Another point made to me by a log home builder was that it is good to at least build for a future loft in these types of homes, even if the whole space were walled off and not used. The reason being, the walls could come off, and the second story finished. He and his wife ended up with custody of a couple grandchildren. His point was that we cannot predict when we might need extra bedrooms. Sure wish you gals lived close by. We'd have this thing done and engineer stamped in the blink of an eye. And we'd have fun doing it. Sigh....haven't met any ladies here like you yet. So it's a little lonesome. Society isn't the same any more. Sandy

I would opt for bigger bath and one shared closet. Would overall be less cramped for space. If you do the closet with a wall closet system with various drawers and hangers there is more than ample space for you both. If not, then you have too many clothes. In my closet I have 3 drawers and a hanger above those in multiple areas, then I have hangers for long clothes, and we have corner shelving and shelves for storage on top. Lots of space. Shoe rack on the floor under the long clothes.