Diann & Cricket, Thanks for your kind responses. I am trying to pump a little life into this forum but it is sometimes tough to tell. I write these articles and have posted a few of them with usually almost no response. I'm not sure if nobody is reading them or if most just wish I would shut-up. Most of these articles are somehow design related because I believe that is where we, as gardeners, can get the biggest bang for our buck. I believe in substituting common sense in place of dollars and cents anytime that I can. The problem is that this topic has usually been so poorly presented that more fear and confusion have been created than helpful knowledge generated. Far too many folks wind up avoiding design issues because it intimidates them. One of the great secrets to life is that the experts usually don't know anywhere as much as you think they know. Unfortunately, when it comes to garden design, many of those who don the appearance of expertise know even less about it than the people reading the magazine. Sorry... I'm not falling for the notion that some writer living in a high rise apartment in New York City is qualified to be telling us (who actually play in the Iowa dirt) how to do things. Picante sauce should not come from New York City and neither should garden advice! I just try to present a little different look at design based upon what I have found actually works. Many times, all that really needs to be done is show folks how they can apply common sense used in daily life to garden situations. I am a great believer in the power of the human spirit. Given a chance and combined with a bit of working knowledge, the potential is awesome. However, each of us are individuals and we don't all learn things the same way. I attempt to capture the essence of design principles and present this information a bit differently without all the highfalutin words. Hopefully, some of us in "that other group" can now understand it too. I may be just an old clod kicker but I have come to realize that the "experts" seem to have a hard time explaining highfalutin words without using a bunch of other highfalutin words. Perhaps they really don't understand things that well either. IronBelly P.S. If anybody actually reads this stuff and would like me to continue posting other articles; please let me know. I'm not looking for ego strokes -- just want to make sure I'm not wasting your time. Otherwise, I'll just crawl back in my hole.

For those who live in the State of California, the law regarding "security deposits" is contained in California Civil Code Section 1950.5, which is (and I shall copy and paste from the online Code): 1950.5. (a) This section applies to security for a rental agreement for residential property that is used as the dwelling of the tenant. (b) As used in this section, "security" means any payment, fee, deposit or charge, including, but not limited to, any payment, fee, deposit, or charge, except as provided in Section 1950.6, that is imposed at the beginning of the tenancy to be used to reimburse the landlord for costs associated with processing a new tenant or that is imposed as an advance payment of rent, used or to be used for any purpose, including, but not limited to, any of the following: (1) The compensation of a landlord for a tenant's default in the payment of rent. (2) The repair of damages to the premises, exclusive of ordinary wear and tear, caused by the tenant or by a guest or licensee of the tenant. (3) The cleaning of the premises upon termination of the tenancy necessary to return the unit to the same level of cleanliness it was in at the inception of the tenancy. The amendments to this paragraph enacted by the act adding this sentence shall apply only to tenancies for which the tenant's right to occupy begins after January 1, 2003. (4) To remedy future defaults by the tenant in any obligation under the rental agreement to restore, replace, or return personal property or appurtenances, exclusive of ordinary wear and tear, if the security deposit is authorized to be applied thereto by the rental agreement. (c) A landlord may not demand or receive security, however denominated, in an amount or value in excess of an amount equal to two months' rent, in the case of unfurnished residential property, and an amount equal to three months' rent, in the case of furnished residential property, in addition to any rent for the first month paid on or before initial occupancy. This subdivision does not prohibit an advance payment of not less than six months' rent if the term of the lease is six months or longer. This subdivision does not preclude a landlord and a tenant from entering into a mutual agreement for the landlord, at the request of the tenant and for a specified fee or charge, to make structural, decorative, furnishing, or other similar alterations, if the alterations are other than cleaning or repairing for which the landlord may charge the previous tenant as provided by subdivision (e). (d) Any security shall be held by the landlord for the tenant who is party to the lease or agreement. The claim of a tenant to the security shall be prior to the claim of any creditor of the landlord. (e) The landlord may claim of the security only those amounts as are reasonably necessary for the purposes specified in subdivision (b). The landlord may not assert a claim against the tenant or the security for damages to the premises or any defective conditions that preexisted the tenancy, for ordinary wear and tear or the effects thereof, whether the wear and tear preexisted the tenancy or occurred during the tenancy, or for the cumulative effects of ordinary wear and tear occurring during any one or more tenancies. (f) (1) Within a reasonable time after notification of either party's intention to terminate the tenancy, or before the end of the lease term, the landlord shall notify the tenant in writing of his or her option to request an initial inspection and of his or her right to be present at the inspection. The requirements of this subdivision do not apply when the tenancy is terminated pursuant to subdivision (2), (3), or (4) of Section 1161 of the Code of Civil Procedure. At a reasonable time, but no earlier than two weeks before the termination or the end of lease date, the landlord, or an agent of the landlord, shall, upon the request of the tenant, make an initial inspection of the premises prior to any final inspection the landlord makes after the tenant has vacated the premises. The purpose of the initial inspection shall be to allow the tenant an opportunity to remedy identified deficiencies, in a manner consistent with the rights and obligations of the parties under the rental agreement, in order to avoid deductions from the security. If a tenant chooses not to request an initial inspection, the duties of the landlord under this subdivision are discharged. If an inspection is requested, the parties shall attempt to schedule the inspection at a mutually acceptable date and time. The landlord shall give at least 48 hours' prior written notice of the date and time of the inspection if either a mutual time is agreed upon, or if a mutually agreed time cannot be scheduled but the tenant still wishes an inspection. The tenant and landlord may agree to forgo the 48-hour prior written notice by both signing a written waiver. The landlord shall proceed with the inspection whether the tenant is present or not, unless the tenant previously withdrew his or her request for the inspection. (2) Based on the inspection, the landlord shall give the tenant an itemized statement specifying repairs or cleaning that are proposed to be the basis of any deductions from the security the landlord intends to make pursuant to paragraphs (1) to (4), inclusive of subdivision (b). This statement shall also include the texts of subdivision (d) and paragraphs (1) to (4), inclusive, of subdivision (b). The statement shall be given to the tenant, if the tenant is present for the inspection, or shall be left inside the premises. (3) The tenant shall have the opportunity during the period following the initial inspection until termination of the tenancy to remedy identified deficiencies, in a manner consistent with the rights and obligations of the parties under the rental agreement, in order to avoid deductions from the security. (4) Nothing in this subdivision shall prevent a landlord from using the security for deductions itemized in the statement provided for in paragraph (2) that were not cured by the tenant so long as the deductions are for damages authorized by this section. (5) Nothing in this subdivision shall prevent a landlord from using the security for any purpose specified in paragraphs (1) to (4), inclusive, of subdivision (b) that occurs between completion of the initial inspection and termination of the tenancy or was not identified during the initial inspection due to the presence of a tenant's possessions. (g) (1) No later than 21 calendar days after the tenant has vacated the premises, but not earlier than the time that either the landlord or the tenant provides a notice to terminate the tenancy under Section 1946 or 1946.1, Section 1161 of the Code of Civil Procedure, or not earlier than 60 calendar days prior to the expiration of a fixed-term lease, the landlord shall furnish the tenant, by personal delivery or by first-class mail, postage prepaid, a copy of an itemized statement indicating the basis for, and the amount of, any security received and the disposition of the security and shall return any remaining portion of the security to the tenant. (2) Along with the itemized statement, the landlord shall also include copies of documents showing charges incurred and deducted by the landlord to repair or clean the premises, as follows: (A) If the landlord or landlord's employee did the work, the itemized statement shall reasonably describe the work performed. The itemized statement shall include the time spent and the reasonable hourly rate charged. (B) If the landlord or landlord's employee did not do the work, the landlord shall provide the tenant a copy of the bill, invoice, or receipt supplied by the person or entity performing the work. The itemized statement shall provide the tenant with the name, address, and telephone number of the person or entity, if the bill, invoice, or receipt does not include that information. (C) If a deduction is made for materials or supplies, the landlord shall provide a copy of the bill, invoice, or receipt. If a particular material or supply item is purchased by the landlord on an ongoing basis, the landlord may document the cost of the item by providing a copy of a bill, invoice, receipt, vendor price list, or other vendor document that reasonably documents the cost of the item used in the repair or cleaning of the unit. (3) If a repair to be done by the landlord or the landlord's employee cannot reasonably be completed within 21 calendar days after the tenant has vacated the premises, or if the documents from a person or entity providing services, materials, or supplies are not in the landlord's possession within 21 calendar days after the tenant has vacated the premises, the landlord may deduct the amount of a good faith estimate of the charges that will be incurred and provide that estimate with the itemized statement. If the reason for the estimate is because the documents from a person or entity providing services, materials, or supplies are not in the landlord's possession, the itemized statement shall include the name, address, and telephone number of the person or entity. Within 14 calendar days of completing the repair or receiving the documentation, the landlord shall complete the requirements in paragraphs (1) and (2) in the manner specified. (4) The landlord need not comply with paragraph (2) or (3) if either of the following apply: (A) The deductions for repairs and cleaning together do not exceed one hundred twenty-five dollars ($125). (B) The tenant waived the rights specified in paragraphs (2) and (3). The waiver shall only be effective if it is signed by the tenant at the same time or after a notice to terminate a tenancy under Section 1946 or 1946.1 has been given, a notice under Section 1161 of the Code of Civil Procedure has been given, or no earlier than 60 calendar days prior to the expiration of a fixed-term lease. The waiver shall substantially include the text of paragraph (2). (5) Notwithstanding paragraph (4), the landlord shall comply with paragraphs (2) and (3) when a tenant makes a request for documentation within 14 calendar days after receiving the itemized statement specified in paragraph (1). The landlord shall comply within 14 calendar days after receiving the request from the tenant. (6) Any mailings to the tenant pursuant to this subdivision shall be sent to the address provided by the tenant. If the tenant does not provide an address, mailings pursuant to this subdivision shall be sent to the unit that has been vacated. (h) Upon termination of the landlord's interest in the premises, whether by sale, assignment, death, appointment of receiver or otherwise, the landlord or the landlord's agent shall, within a reasonable time, do one of the following acts, either of which shall relieve the landlord of further liability with respect to the security held: (1) Transfer the portion of the security remaining after any lawful deductions made under subdivision (e) to the landlord's successor in interest. The landlord shall thereafter notify the tenant by personal delivery or by first-class mail, postage prepaid, of the transfer, of any claims made against the security, of the amount of the security deposited, and of the names of the successors in interest, their address, and their telephone number. If the notice to the tenant is made by personal delivery, the tenant shall acknowledge receipt of the notice and sign his or her name on the landlord's copy of the notice. (2) Return the portion of the security remaining after any lawful deductions made under subdivision (e) to the tenant, together with an accounting as provided in subdivision (g). (i) Prior to the voluntary transfer of a landlord's interest in the premises, the landlord shall deliver to the landlord's successor in interest a written statement indicating the following: (1) The security remaining after any lawful deductions are made. (2) An itemization of any lawful deductions from any security received. (3) His or her election under paragraph (1) or (2) of subdivision (h). This subdivision does not affect the validity of title to the real property transferred in violation of this subdivision. (j) In the event of noncompliance with subdivision (h), the landlord's successors in interest shall be jointly and severally liable with the landlord for repayment of the security, or that portion thereof to which the tenant is entitled, when and as provided in subdivisions (e) and (g). A successor in interest of a landlord may not require the tenant to post any security to replace that amount not transferred to the tenant or successors in interest as provided in subdivision (h), unless and until the successor in interest first makes restitution of the initial security as provided in paragraph (2) of subdivision (h) or provides the tenant with an accounting as provided in subdivision (g). This subdivision does not preclude a successor in interest from recovering from the tenant compensatory damages that are in excess of the security received from the landlord previously paid by the tenant to the landlord. Notwithstanding this subdivision, if, upon inquiry and reasonable investigation, a landlord's successor in interest has a good faith belief that the lawfully remaining security deposit is transferred to him or her or returned to the tenant pursuant to subdivision (h), he or she is not liable for damages as provided in subdivision (l), or any security not transferred pursuant to subdivision (h). (k) Upon receipt of any portion of the security under paragraph (1) of subdivision (h), the landlord's successors in interest shall have all of the rights and obligations of a landlord holding the security with respect to the security. (l) The bad faith claim or retention by a landlord or the landlord's successors in interest of the security or any portion thereof in violation of this section, or the bad faith demand of replacement security in violation of subdivision (j), may subject the landlord or the landlord's successors in interest to statutory damages of up to twice the amount of the security, in addition to actual damages. The court may award damages for bad faith whenever the facts warrant such an award, regardless of whether the injured party has specifically requested relief. In any action under this section, the landlord or the landlord's successors in interest shall have the burden of proof as to the reasonableness of the amounts claimed or the authority pursuant to this section to demand additional security deposits. (m) No lease or rental agreement may contain any provision characterizing any security as "nonrefundable." (n) Any action under this section may be maintained in small claims court if the damages claimed, whether actual or statutory or both, are within the jurisdictional amount allowed by Section 116.220 of the Code of Civil Procedure. (o) Proof of the existence of and the amount of a security deposit may be established by any credible evidence, including, but not limited to, a canceled check, a receipt, a lease indicating the requirement of a deposit as well as the amount, prior consistent statements or actions of the landlord or tenant, or a statement under penalty of perjury that satisfies the credibility requirements set forth in Section 780 of the Evidence Code. (p) The amendments to this section made during the 1985 portion of the 1985-86 Regular Session of the Legislature that are set forth in subdivision (e) are declaratory of existing law. (q) The amendments to this section made during the 2003 portion of the 2003-04 Regular Session of the Legislature that are set forth in paragraph (1) of subdivision (f) are declaratory of existing law.

OH MY - I missed so much and what a fun game too. We had a great time and I have a tan to prove it. I just had to get involved in this game, so I have also cut and pasted and will come back to answer the questions. I am off to water Yoga. I missed all of you. THE GAME, so far: DeeMarie 1) I wanted to become a nun when I was in 7th grade 2) I changed my first name when I turned 18 3) I used to sing with a rock band BJ 1. I auditioned for lead part in "Assassins" starring Sylvester Stallone. 2. I met my second husband on the Dating Game while working as a Technical Assistant. He was the bachelor. 3. I have been selected as a finalist in Food TV's "Be the Next Food Network's Star" contest. MAGICKITTY 1. Had a photograph published. 2. Spring breaked with Jack Nicklas for a week. 3. Went on tour w/ Ted Nugent for 3 mo. Selling T-shirts MADDIE 1) I had dinner with a Congresswoman/General Franks 2) I was a morning DJ on a local radio station that is now owned by Clear Channel 3) I skydived TIKANIS 1) Jerry Garcia once threw up on to my shoe 2) I did a back pack survival trip for 3 weeks in Colorado 3) both of my children have references to Elvis in their names BESH 1. Ran in the Boston Marathon 2. Competed in a wet tee shirt contest 3. Worked as a mall Easter Bunny MARCI 1 - I once shaved my head as a form of rebellion. 2 - I have never watched a Star Wars movie. 3 - I once ate a whole jar of pickles in one sitting PATTI 1. Won backstage pass to a Kenny G concert & got his autograph. 2. Did barrel racing in rodeos in TX. 3. Attended a barbeque on the set of Dallas. Suzanne 1. had dinner with Julia Child 2. I am a certified scuba and ice diver 3. Former Sec. of State, Madeleine Albright is my aunt Raeanne 1. I saw a UFO 2. I wrote manuals for Mayor Koch (NYC) 3. I survived a skyscraper fire

PO1, I'm going to be very clear here because it is obvious you are not getting what I am saying. BM IS NOT REQUIRED TO SEND PICTURES. 1. "You sent estranged relatives DD's pictures because I guess they do not see her or see her infrequently." Not true. "You guess" incorrectly. My dd sees my mother at least once a year, often enough to "take her own pictures", have them be current, and not "bother BM" with picture requests. 2. "Seems that BM sent that picture at the time when dad was not seeing SD, 2 years ago? " Not true. You are making erroneous assumptions again. See that twice above I told you that SD gave us that picture. It was a Christmas gift. 3. "logically dad would take his own pictures of her?" Yes, that's logical but your statement of such is redundant. See above where I state that we have many pictures of SD that we have taken. 4. "I doubt he sends BM his pictures of SD" That's true. He doesn't. But he sends SD pictures of herself. Email is a great invention that allows this to happen with ease! 5. "since SD has limited communication with dad," There you go, making assumptions and running with them again. Did you miss the post above where I state she has a laptop purchased by us and an internet connection? ********* OP, it just depends on the person I guess. When I was in the middle of a very bitter divorce I still sent X pictures of DD. I'm estranged from my mother but still send her pictures, and when my DD visits her (last visit was two months ago) she sends pictures back of DD's visit. Same with X-inlaws. They send pics, I send pics. Somehow I've managed to maintain a civil relationship with various people in my life in regards to DD that is independent of personal feelings for one another. You can't buy class. ;)