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playinmud

Toilet Tales of Woe

playinmud
15 years ago

As would be expected, things in a 100 year old house wear out over time. Over the past month we noticed a wet spot appearing on the rug at the side of the toilet. Always the same spot, but intermittent when it shows up. Clear like water, doesnt smell like urine, we all argued about it, but my mother decides its not someone missing and not the cat, it must be the toilet leaking somehow (but each time she launders the rug to be sure). So, my mother asked my brother to look at it. He stopped over, looked at it, didnÂt see how it could be a leak, but took off the toilet, pulled up that portion of the tile floor to see what was going on. Of course the answer is "nothing". A week later, my nephew retiles the floor, the next day my brother put down a new wax ring, all new connections, escutcheons, and all new guts for the toilet tank and reinstalled it.

Sigh, another money pit emergency averted! But no, it seems that the guts for the toilet donÂt really fit right, so my brother gets another brand, hmm, that one doesnÂt stop the constant water running problem either, so in total he buys 5 different tank kits, none of them work, so the problem still exists. Last resort we have a plumber come in. He said itÂs a 25 year old Sears toilet, unfortunately Sears doesnÂt make toilets any longer and they donÂt make replacement parts to support existing products.

The plumber offered to buy and install a new toilet for $500. My thought was fine get it done, IÂll pay for it and problem solved. But no, I get a phone call at work from my agitated mother. "I want you to go to Home Depot tonight to buy a new toilet, then your brother will come and put it in on Saturday, youÂre not spending $500 on a toilet." Okay, so to make a long story short I asked my brother, because he owns a van, to take me and our sister to HD. So, we looked at the toilets and I picked out a nice toilet, but the sister says, "no, its too small". I was confused, looking at the toilets they are all basically the same size, but okay we go to LoweÂs. The sister picks out this really nice toilet. DonÂt you know itÂs the same American Standard toilet I had chosen at HD?! I wanted to scream, but just bit my tongue and bought the toilet.

On Saturday my brother installed the new toilet, great! Works like a charm, all is right with the world, yeah! But no, the new toilet (which can handle flushing 6 tennis balls at once) has a smaller water tank, unfortunately when my dad wallpapered the bathroom he didnÂt paper behind the tank, so thereÂs a 3-4 inch swath on either side of the tank of the old plaster. WeÂre very organized, all wallpaper remnants are located in the same closet, but for some reason this paper is missing. Somewhere in the house are the remnants of that papering project, who knows where dad squirreled it away. IsnÂt that always the way it is? I know whatÂs going to happen, IÂm going to have to repaper the bathroom, but not this weekend.

Well, at least the whole problem of the wet rug spot is resolved! But no, the sister walks into the bathroom last night to see the 18 year old cat squatting in the bathroom piddling on the rug in the very same spot. SheÂs on her last legs, she drinks a lot of water, her urine doesnÂt smell. Why every once in awhile she decides to literally walk right past her cat box, in the laundry room, and pee in the bathroom is beyond me. WeÂll just keep the powder room door closed from now on.

So, to sum it up, there was never anything wrong with the toilet in the first place, it was all the sisterÂs cat. Sigh.

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