Molly - I went through a similar experience from the spring of 2002 when my husband was diagnosed with cancer, his passing in 2003 and then a year of what I can only call depression but not diagnosed as such. My gardens completely suffered. When I got back to gardening I didn't try and create what 'was' but moved things around and created a whole new look and love it. This may not be the answer for you but it did work for me. My only advice is to try and not do too much at a time maybe even downsize so it doesn't seem so over whelming. Good luck and the most important thing is to enjoy the process....

Lynne

Hi Molly, Would it help you to have everything in print so you can see it all laid out? Someone on the perennials forum has an excel program she shares so you can put in plants and when they are flowering. A diagram of each bed might help as well. Then a calender to keep track of when you do what.
I hope I am not off here, but I am a very random person and it helps in many arenas when someone creates what I call boxes so I can concretely see what is going on. You may need someone to help you get the paperwork created.

I have Fibromyalgia and one of the problems that some people get with that is what they call "fog". My fog seems to be more like alzheimers and I get easily overwhelmed because it is almost impossible to focus on anything for long. I also forget the names of plants from one minute to the next. I found that making a list of everything I have helps me when I "loose" the name.

Last winter I got a graph paper tablet and drew out my entire yard and the garden beds to scale. I did each quadrant of the yard on a seperate sheet of paper to allow room to write on it. In the spring I numbered my list and then put each plant on the graph paper in a circle that was sized to represent the size the plant will grow to. Then I put the plant number in the circle. It has made everything so much easier for me to keep track of. Now when I plant something I take the tag inside, write the plant on my list, give it a number, take out my graph paper and mark it on the drawing of my yard.

This also helps when I go to the nursery because I can easily refer to my "map" and list and it keeps me on track of what sort of plants I need for specific areas. Otherwise I just pick things up with no idea of where I'm going to put them and I don't get overwhelmed with all the choices. It also makes it sooo much easier to explain to the sales clerk who is offering to help me find something. I can say I need something 2 ft. tall and blue to go next to this _______. Then the clerk can think about sun, water, soil etc. because he/she knows what is already growing where I plan to put the plant. Saves me from struggling with all those things.

It takes some time to get it all on paper. I spent all winter at it last winter. It was worth the work. I don't have to feel embarassed when I go to open my mouth and nothing comes out, because I can't think at the moment. I feel much more organized and functional now too. If you suffer like I do from this disorder...you'll understand what a relief this little thing can be.

Good luck!
MeMo

Molly, can you post pictures of your gardens on the gallery side? Your garden sounds beautiful. Overgrown can be what I call established and lush.

Edna

Molly, I can sympathize with not keeping up with things. I got a spiral-bound notebook (with a holographic cover - just cause I like that kind of stuff). Each year I make notes and draw outlines of my different gardens. It is so easy to track what plant went where, and compare it to other years. I write down the names from the tags of plants and I find I don't pull out the plant the next year - I know to look for it. All the seeds in the cutting garden were listed as they were planted so I could check the plan in the book, even though they got washed around with the intense spring rains. With Trudi's wintersown site, I can check on the newly emerged seedling photos there to make sure I am not weeding them out.

It is fun to read notes from past years.

Take some photos throughout the growing year. That has helped me place things in following years and is also great for checking the scale of the plants together or remembering where I needed a filler plant.

MuffieNH

thank you all. i will try lots of your ideas. haven't figured out how to get photos on computer yet, will try, tho. and thanks especially for your encouragement. it means a lot when life changes so dramatically. mol
ps like my spelling of struggling? i used to be a proofreader, lol.

Molly - I gardened hard today. I pulled sickly plants, weeded, divided and added shredded bark around my beds. OMGosh it looks like a new garden with the shredded bark. I patted myself on the back :-)

Edna

Molly, My sis got permanent brain damage in a car crash and lost a lot of abilities, like adding game scores, being able to follow crochet directions and things like that. She nearly gave up gardening as she can't move her head too much. However, she refocused in her garden in two ways. Her husband is going blind and she wanted to make a place he could be comfortable out in the sun so she hired her son to make her a patio. That took away some of the work of both lawns and beds. She also began work on broader beds planted with more easy care plants, but with lots of whimsey for the little girls for whom she is a substitute granny. So broader beds with fewer and low maintainence plants, so the little girls can run around and play, and then she got fairies and made fairy homes with the girls for helpers. I have not seen her new gardens yet, but my sis found some new purpose doing it for others, yet making it much more simple so she could cope.

Molly,
Bless your heart. At least the fresh air and digging in the dirt will help you feel better.
I too have brain problems from CNS Lupus. I dont remember what I plant from one day to the next, so I take digital pictures and have my daughters label them on my computer. Each year, I pull out or plant new things and marvel at how much that particular year is my favorite. Who cares if I remember? :)
I cant garden when its sunny, so the evening and very early morning has me out there planting like a vampire. I love it though and the very few mintues of fresh air I get help my cns problems and depression from said disease so much better.
Bless all of you struggling to find a bit of color whilst coping with a myriad of problems.