!!!!!WARNING!!!!!

Ladies before you read this I recommend you pull on a pair of Depends it will save a lot of embarrassment. Don't laugh guys, I recommend you do the same. Flower I laughed so hard my sides are hurting. You'll never know how much I needed a good laugh this morning.

P.S. There seems to be one of those old girls lurking in my house too.

Annette

Annette ~ I am glad you had a good laugh. It was just what I needed yesterday too.

Hugs ~ FlowerLady

Thanks for posting this, FlowerLady.
What a belly-jiggler! (that is in reference to the OLD WOMAN of course!) I really was in tears with laughter.

Patti

I read the thread and it was charming. I lift my glass to that old woman. For she made me the man I am today.

Steven

Patti ~ Glad you had a nice belly-jiggle laugh from reading that.

Steven ~ Reading this piece was such a stress-reliever at this time of year. Getting older is no picnic, and reading this let me know I wasn't alone in all the intricacies of growing older. I want to do it gracefully with laughter and love filling my being. Glad you had a wonderful old woman in your life who loved you, you are blessed.

FlowerLady

I read it a few days ago. My husband could not figure out what was so funny! I was laughing so hard that I couldn't tell him. I can't go back there to see what else the old woman has been doing (but she's at my house a lot).

Cameron

The 'Old Woman' thread is a riot.

I know that old lady also. Today she had to go back to a store and have them scan gift cards she bought last week cause she lost the receipt and can't remember what the demoninations are. Then she had picked out some jewelry which she asked them to hold while she finished her shopping and when she was half way home she realized she forgot to tell the clerk to get the jewelery for her. Now the old bitty has to drive all the way back to the store and get the jewelery. Hope she can remember which store it is!!!
Vikki

And apparently the poor old thing has forgotten how to spell. Bless her heart (as we in the south say).

Denominations

Jewelry.........OMG!!!

Vikki

LOL, Vikki! At least you could find the gift cards. I've got one that's gone missing. I'm blaming it on the cat. ; )

The old woman has been rumored to have been seen in LaLa land but only the nip & tuck docs know for sure and they're not telling. ; )

Btw, that ol' broad hitched a ride to Mervyn's with me earlier today. Good thing, too, because she talked me into participating in their buy 1, get 2 free sweater clearance. That's right - TWO free! She kept reminding me how cold I get now that my skin is thinner. Like I need to be reminded! Hmph! But then she leaves the store without checking the receipt, which I've always done since I don't live close enough to just run back there if something is wrong. So, I get around the corner at Farmer Boys, order a turkey sandwich and fried zucchini, which she insists I need for the fiber (double HMPH!), and take a look at my receipt while patiently waiting at the drive through (she, of course, was drumming her fingers on MY steering wheel!). Sure enough, I was charged wrong!

So now I have to go back to the mall, find another parking space, then back into the store, lugging a huge bag of clothes. Did I mention that she insisted three sweaters wasn't enough so I got 6, plus the two pair of black slacks that I had originally went shopping for. Ok, so some earrings and two belts got in there, too. Please, be real, who's counting this time of year.

Anyway, I get near a counter and see a huge line, similar to the one I'd just stood in for twenty minutes buying those blasted (but warm! she says) sweaters and think, oh no, please don't tell me I have to go through this again! Then a clerk walks by and I politely tell her what happened, to which she replys, "Yes, you need to get in line again." Well, for once I was glad that ol' broad was along for the ride because she pipes up and says, "Well, you NEED to get a manager." Sweetly, but firmly. Ten minutes later all was corrected with no standing in line, and I headed home, promising to not be so hard on the ol' broad in the future. But I'm not ruling out the nip & tuck docs. ; )

Diana

Diana...LMAO...I think the old lady has wet her pants!! I'll hafta go to the bathroom with her to make sure she doesn't throw those wet panties (if you can even call them that) in the hamper. God, how I get tired of seeing her oversized underwear hanging from the shower rod.
Vikki

You may be an old person if this chart fits you.

ThinMan

{{gwi:618095}}

TM, you've been peeking in my window, that seems to be the story of my life. I now keep a record book of where I store everything I don't use very often, the only thing wrong with this is... I just had that %@#! book a minute ago, where the &@$$ did I put it.

Annette

cute...that should be condensed into some kind of internet story :) I can see great emails and forwards coming from it.. :)

This is great! Good laughs for this time of year. The thread at the other forum has added some since I started this thread.

TMan ~ You are so right. That older couple that lives with us are always looking for things they thought they knew where they were. Sometimes they find them, other times other don't. It's frustrating as heck to these two and they grumble and complain and say words that they probably shouldn't.

They also can't eat the same things they used to be able to. They get heart burn and gas, for which they take papaya enzymes and peppermint to settle things down.

She has a hard time getting up and down as her knees bother her and she's got some arthritis in her right hand. They both think they are still young, and they are in their hearts, but their bodies and the mirror tell them differently.

They still listen to rock and roll, the blues, jazz, and reggae and other music as well. They laugh, and they love and learn with each new day that they are blessed with. Laughter and music are great medicine for hearts and souls.

Blessings on the old women and men who come into our lives.

FlowerLady

FlowerLady, you are so right about laughter and music being great medicine.

LOL ThinMan! That chart is ME to a tee (or is it T).
It's going on the fridge for sure!

LOL! Vikki, I get so tired of that old woman hauling me off to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Why can't she learn to stop drinking fluids by 8 p.m.!

Too funny, TM. But I think they need to include a "segment" for the guys - ya know, the one for the percentage of times y'all leave things open like doors & drawers and, uh hem!, your zipper!!!

Diana