Jen:

Our last house was like that- lots of flowers, a lawn, hedges, and vegetables. It was pretty but lots of maintenance.

This house we planted mostly rose bushes (90), blueberry bushes (40), and fruit trees consisting of stonefruit (20), citrus (8), and apple trees (100+). This is all mulched heavily. Despite all of this, the maintenance is an hour a week, if that. I can easily let it go a few weeks with nothing if need be, or I can go out and piddle around, playing with espalier, training, or summer pruning. We get a ton of tree-ripened fruit all year round, and it's much more rewarding than the last house. Someday I may plant some grass, but not any more than I can mow in 20 minutes (including edging).

Applenut

I also go through spells where gardening feels like all work and not much fun. As with home improvement, it seems like there's always something that needs fixed (e.g., big bare spot, X plant that isn't happy and needs to be moved--but where?, drip watering system needs to be reworked, etc. etc.). I think once you get to a certain level of capability/knowledge in a given field, then you come to understand what it takes to do something well--which means putting in the time and energy for planning and execution. It becomes more like a job and less of a hobby, you know?

Partly I've adopted Applenut's strategy: realize what you're good for. For instance, I've given up on container gardening--I've killed too many things by letting them dry out or overwatering them on the drip system. I avoid planting annuals, herbs that have to be replanted like basil and things that completely die back in the winter.

I think if you feel unenthusiastic, it probably means you should just take a break from the whole thing for a while. If it's an option to hire someone to do basic maintenance or have someone else take over for a while so things don't go totally to pot, that might give you the opportunity to forget all about the garden for a while...or the time to spend time on the fun stuff, like plant shopping. Even fun hobbies can be work when you have to do them all the time...

Jenn: our huge gardens have gotten overwhelming and so, I'm like you.... unenthusiastic. This year I hired a crew to come in and do the big removals under my supervision. It helped immensely to not have to do this "heavy labor" myself.

Also, I've been losing a number of desired plants to the long-duration, high summer heat we've experienced these last couple of summers. This hasn't helped my moral one bit. We're lucky that we're on a well, but the watering on top of the irrigation has been daunting too. Wanda would probably tell me to go xeric, but I'm not fond of that look.

We also have a number of fruit bearing trees that we never get any fruit from because the critters get everything but the Apriums, which are early. I'd love to eat one of the Pluots or a handful of cherries, but unless I buy them at the store I don't get any.

Yes, I'm in a well deserved funk too.

I was wondering where you were Jenn.
I was just realizing recently I haven't been out there as much also. But this time of year not much to do. Just a little dead-heading here and there.
I have just cut down 3 palms and in another month I'll dig them out once dead.
I do agree with cowper maybe get some hired help for the simple maintenance so when you do feel better then you won't be overwhelmed.
But just getting out in the sun can help also even if just on the weekend for half hour or so.

Thanks everyone. I'm so relieved to read your reports and to know you understand. I wondered if maybe I'm not a real gardener after all. It has become daunting, and as I get older I will be less inclined (even if not less able) to move and divide plants every year; I'll want a more fuss-free garden to enjoy so I can spend more time with Hubby and family.

Last November I severed the tendon in my thumb which required out-patient surgery; it was still mending in March so I had to do things very delicately. That set me back as I got NOTHING done last fall and winter, the prime gardening season. Now that it's all overgrown and unmulched, I don't know where to start!

I think a good place to start is to make a list of what really needs to be done, and begin with the most important task. Leisurely start after breakfast, and finish at noon -- period. Or, start at noon and finish at 3:00 PM and no later. One by one, each task will be done with less effort and I won't feel like my life is dominated by the garden.

Thanks so much for your support and comments, I really appreciate it and feel better already. :-)

Sometimes the neglect can't be helped and you just need to get over feeling guilty that you let some plants die. When I have lost plants it felt like my cat died because I did not feed him! Several surgeries in recent years have taken a big chunk out of the time working in the garden,so stop feeling guilty and do what you can. This time of year I can and do spend time in the relative comfort of the greenhouse planting seed and starting cuttings. Each batch of emerging seeds gives me something to look forward to this summer. Al

Jenn, what you mentioned in your last post is so true! Something usually happens to cause a "break" from the usual routine (i.e., injury, family emergency, big projects), and it's hard to get back in the swing of things, let alone at the pace you were going. I've been there, too.

I finally just forced myself to do what had to be done, and it was amazing how much better I felt once I got going! It's sometimes hard to see the end result when there's so much in the way. As you said, little by little, it will get done, and each step will bring you satisfaction and joy.

Best wishes to you!

Brenda

Yes, it has. I think I like planning, shopping, and planting a lot more than maintaining, LOL!

Fortunately, we only have 1/6 of an acre - a little over 2200 sq. ft. of garden beds total. I prefer to spend no more than a couple of hours in a day gardening, so I will concentrate on one or two beds at a time, or just a couple of very specific tasks. It's much less "mentally tiring" than thinking everything that needs to be done all in one day. And when I go slower, I enjoy the gardening more, too.

I'm always moving plants around, but sometimes I hire my gardener to move the biggies for me. And most of our plants are easy-care. I hand-water with soaker hoses, but can maintain a cottage garden look with very low summer water usage. We were in a mini-drought when I started planning the landscaping, so it was always planned to be a low-water garden.

Mostly the gardening now consists of pruning, cleanup, fertilizing and mulching. Oh yeah, and always having at least one vase of flowers for the house! That's always cheering, especially those times when folks back East are complaining about snow and ice. I so do not miss the Midwest, let me tell you....

This is one of the big reasons why I don't want more land, and in fact plan to downsize as we get older. I love gardening, but there's a lot more things I want to do, too; especially when my DH retires!

I think jkom51 hit the nail on the head: I love gardening, but there's a lot more things I want to do, too.

I used to say that during those days.... "I love to garden, but I like to do other things too!". I didn't realize that I had allowed myself to become a slave to the garden, and I was beginning to resent it, also not realizing that it wasn't the garden's fault, LOL. I felt like I had septuplet (or more) newborns who would never get out of diapers!

I like the idea of breaking the tasks down into smaller pieces and doing them for a couple of hours at a time, then quitting so I can do something else.

And Brenda, yes, that is so true. I can think of other things I stopped doing after something else interrupted the routine.

Yes. I have had this feeling for about two minutes; then it passes. I think everyone becomes a bit overwhelmed and busy at times to do as much as they would like. Then it all seems like a chore, instead of a pleasure. Think of all the wonderful projects and beautiful flowers you have grown in the past; it will come back to inspire you and you can start out slowly again. You don't have to do everything at once.

When i get like that,and believe me i do.I just step back,take a break and either look through my albums,or what i have stored on the computor.Looking at all that eye candy gets me motivated to keep moving.

I also try not to do to much in one day,instead i'll set aside a day to work on the bed outside my bedroom window,another to work on the one on the other side of the house ,etc,etc.We hired guys to come in and do our mowing and weed eating,and fertilizing the lawns,so that frees me up also.

Dh gardens as well,and he helps me with the heavy stuff,and he takes care of the lower part of the yard,since i have knee trouble,and it's hard for me to go up and down there.

Just do your best,and don't worry,somehow the rest will get done,and/or will just blend in.
Kathi

Jenn, could you perhaps be stressed over the "major company" visit later this year? Will they understand that you have had an injury, and haven't been able to keep up with everything? Or even that you would rather spend time with loved ones now. Having your garden shaped up for inspection sounds like it would create something like performance anxiety, which would drain the fun out of anything. Is impressing your guests worth the discomfort it's causing you? The garden is there for your pleasure, not theirs. If they complain and criticize, hand them a shovel. Good luck with it.

My husband and I had a discussion about this at the breakfast table this morning. I cried! I feel burdened and guilty, and yet don't do anything. I am going to try hiring help a couple of days a month...I will work with them... and hope this reinvigorates both me and the garden. So far my husband and I have done all the work on our 13 acres, and I feel as if it's getting to be too much.

I've gone thru spells where I am less interested in spending time in the yard, but have always come back, usually in the spring when the urge to garden is stimulated by the warm weather and the thought of new nursery stock to explore. However, over the last couple of years, I find my energy levels are waning due to age, and the garden is beginning to be a major chore, and I feel guilty every time I go out and see the neglect. I've got a teenager working for me to do the grunt stuff, but I can see the writing on the wall. I have been slowly downsizing aggressive plants(mostly the vines), and trying to think of ways to make things less work, but still interesting. Part of the problem is the amount of introduced weeds that I have dragged home inadvertently over the years. While I appreciate the serendipity of volunteers, I cant keep up with the weeds anymore. I need to get serious and mulch, and grout the space between the flagstones in the walkway. Plants that get huge quickly or spread rapidly are getting serious evaluations as to whether they are worth it or not. I used to feel deprived that I only have a quarter acre to garden in, now I'm almost sorry.

Hi Jen...Yes, and it's happening with another major interest in my life, so I understand. Maybe you just need a breather, to back off a bit or to find a different aspect of gardening that you might enjoy.
Sounds like you have a lot of knowledge that can be shared with others. Perhaps you could teach or write a gardening book...Sharyn

Jenn- I know the feeling. Mrs Holedigger is 6 mos. pregnant and in full nesting mode. I have been neglecting the yard for the past 5 months so that I can finish up as many interior projects as possible before the "baby project" starts :) Also winter is the saddest time in my yard, and this winter has been unusually gray and chilly. I have some front yard plans for this year, and I am going to hire out everything this time. I have a desert-tropical, succulent theme in mind with some new hardscape, with "low maintenance" and "low water" being a major component of the design, because something tells me I won't be having every weekend to garden anymore.

Start thinking about your fuss free garden when time and interest permit. I too want a fuss free garden, so I hope you will share your ideas with us.

Westelle,

When I think "xeric", I imagine a lot of cactus and gravel. If that's what you're thinking when you say "xeric", then I agree it's not an appealing alternative for a low-water landscape. Looking at the Las Pilitas site regarding plant communities in and around Fresno, I find 3 different ones listed:

Central Oak Woodland
Valley Grassland
California Shadscale

That last one is new to me. But I think that by choosing plants that are native to your area, and suited to the climate you have in Fresno, you can build a beautiful garden that requires far reduced maintenance, especially watering, over non-native plants. They will require some water in the first year or two to get them established, and then they should thrive with only the natural rainfall (with perhaps some minimal supplemental watering in particularly dry years).

The Sequoia Chapter of the California Native Plant Society covers Fresno county, and may be a good resource for you in determining what plants are suited to your area.

Thank you, lusty. The last category is new to me too. One of my problems is the design of our house and surrounding areas which look best with more formal, slightly blowzy gardens, meeting a mowed low-grass area just past a rustic fence (fire), then into the final tall-grass Oak Savanna which covers the vast majority of 20 acres.

Also, I've had trouble getting the natives to grow. Either my DH insists on watering them OR the critters make them lunch.

And, as I said before, I really like a blowzy, I-want-to-grow-just-this-way garden anyway. I'm even getting use to the gophers helping with the major pruning. (I wonder which one of the giant Agaves they'll have dined on this winter?)

Inspiration, sminsporation. We all lose inspiration from time to time. When the mood hits, you'll do it. Until then, if it ain't perfect, it's okay. You are not a "public garden" and things don't have to be picture perfect. If it bothers you enough, you will fix it.

Part of the lack of inspiration may be that you were obsessive about doing the landscaping and now that you basically have it done, it's a fait accomplii (scuse the Italiian).

wanda

There's no reason a hobby, however loved, HAS to be a hobby for life. You went at it full-tilt for a long time, perhaps you've gotten out of it everything you want to get out of it. There's nothing wrong with moving on to other adventures.

A few years ago I was going through a lull in my inspiration. I make a living in the gardening industry, this is not good! I wrote some thoughts I would like to share.

Here is a link that might be useful: davewilson.com

Ed, thanks for that link and article. A familiar story, good reflections.

Jenn, I have gone through this too, somehow something pulls me back into the garden though but not without a major change of direction (usually).
The first time was after a blight struck the majority of my antique rose collection (I had hundreds) - only about a third of them survived.
I began exploring Plumeria and acquired about a hundred of them - but then remember the freeze last winter? - many casualties despite being wintered under the eaves of the house....
Then the wind knocked down three dead trees that had served as supports for ramblers and suddenly I found myself with a blank canvas for another garden. I spent many happy hours pouring over books, catalogs and internet research in planning my new venture, an edible landscape including some trees to shade my house (I chose flowering Japanese cherries , Prunus mume and blireana).
Next came acquisition and installation (luckily it was bareroot season), learning to graft, prune, train and trading scionwood - but as always the problems cropped up. Squirrels raiding the fruit trees and breaking grafts, flowering cherries barely growing let alone providing any shade at all and with energy to spare I ran out of room for any more.
Now I am facing a move. My next garden will be planned around ease of maintenance. I vow to be a selector and not a collector but who knows if that will stick as I realize I have serial obsessions.
My friend Tony Kienitz wrote a book on gardening in which he recounts a elderly man who limited his garden work to 20 minutes a day. It sounds like a good idea with the right garden plan and leaves time for other pursuits and interests of which I have many.

Ed, I thank you for your article, I especially liked your observations on the parallels of marriage and gardening; I hope you have a happy continuity. Gardening is great therapy but it (in my case anyway) is solitary and can therefore be isolating. Too much of a good thing...well you all know the end of that sentence. As with everything else, balance is key.

Thank you Jenn for asking the question. My "lack of interest in the garden" stemmed from my putting up my home for sale. Since I was selling my home 'as is' then I felt like what is the point of buying new plants, working in the yard, etc., when someone would come in and knock everyting out. I finally took it off the market, but plan to put it up again. So here I am in limbo....