So sorry to hear of the loss of the babies and Male BB. How sad. Do you have a sparrow spooker on the box? Was there any sign of trauma to the males head? What about the babies, do they look pecked at all. If it was a HOSP you will see peck marks on the babies and the male, it is very evident when they die from a HOSP attack. If there are no signs of trauma it is hard to tell. If the female does not take the dead babies out you should, also check for blowfly larva in the nest, I had them kill two 6 day old babies last year and I had to do a nestchange in order to save the one remaining baby. Good luck, I hope the lone baby survives, Momma shouldn't have any problems providing for just one. If you don't have a spooker up get one up asap. Donna Here is a link that might be useful: sight with info on spookers and blowfly

Becky, I've had a tough year too. I get it, but it's time to -- in the words of my late father -- get an attitude adjustment. I hated it when he said that. ;-) I hope you will understand what I am saying and know it not said with judgment, any harsh thoughts or desire to cause you pain. Sometimes there are things e probably already know, but it helps to hear someone else say them. That's where I'm coming from -- with a desire to help you over a hurdle. I see so much to be grateful for and to celebrate in your posts. Isn't it wonderful that you found that happiness and know that life has so much more to offer you than you had before? Eighteen months is not years or decades, but it is hundreds of days -- hundreds of sunrises, hundreds of sunsets and everything in between. And what about the fact that you were married? You may be a widow now, but had you not been married, you would not be next of kin and would have had no legal relationship or rights. He could have just as easily have passed before you were married and you would have had no say on his final affairs. You did say goodbye -- you tried to save him and pull him back, then you laid him to rest when you couldn't. That's more than many people get, Trust me, even when death is years in coming, you don't get to plan the moment or the way you say goodbye. You make the most of what you get and you give what you can for as long as you can. What do you want your late husband's legacy to be? What would he want the gift of his time with you to be? Sorrow? Being oppressed by his memory as you were a previous spouse? Or joy for everyday you had together and the things you know are possible? First tings first -- stop kicking yourself. You are not God. You didn't give him the heart condition and you couldn't save him. You said some things you regret -- doesn't everyone? And don't you think the one who loved you knew that better than anyone? If he didn't then, he does now -- more than you. Most of all, I want to suggest you try to spend some time each day counting your blessings. Maybe first thing over coffee, maybe in the shower or as you get ready for sleep -- it may be the first spring bloom you saw, a favorite tune you heard, a kind word said, a checkout line that moved quickly, that you didn't get any bills in the mail -- or at east anything unexpected, hat a friend shared a happiness with you or you were able to do something for someone else. Find a few new things each day and reflect back on one happiness from days gone by, Say thank you fr each one and don't take them for granted. The events in your life may not change (maybe they will), but how you feel about them will. I bought a greeting card when I was in college and planned to send it to my parents when the time was right. Instead, I enjoyed reading it and still have it. It had a Sandra Boyton hippo on the front and he was saying he was on a new diet. He used to eat when he was unhappy, so now he only ate when he was happy. You open the card and he comments, "I haven't lost a pound, but the change in my mood is remarkable." Loved that card and it still makes me smile. Then try to reach out to others who are lonely or in need of help. There are so many elderly who need companionship, meals or assistance with simple tasks, people who need tutoring. blind people who would appreciate reading books for them or taping them, children and adults in hospitals who are bored or scared, animals in shelters who would love to be touched and loved, walked, etc. You might even decide to adopt a pet and give them a new lease on life and let them give you purrs or wags. Helping someone else up always lifts you too. You can't replace your late husband, but you can lose out on a lot of life and happiness wishing he was there. Instead, take what he taught you and what he shared with you and go apply it in a life he would be happy to be watching you live. Give him that gift - now and should you meet again. I've shed a lot of tears too They are unavoidable, and they can be cleansing. Cry when you have to, but don't let them take over. You were given a wonderful gift. Live thankfully.

Well, SS is in crisis mode again... Bimbo GF broke up with him and said some pretty terrible things. (Probably much too close to the ugly truth.) He quit his job and isn't working, so has much too much free time on his hands and is using it poorly -- drinking in bars, picking fights, driving himself home. He's also abusing his sleeping pills and anti-anxiety meds. And of course, everyone's worried sick again. And frustrated again. And angry again. And torn between his 'Crying Wolf' antics and 'What if he means it this time?' He still hasn't said anything to indicate he'd commit suicide, but his behavior sure is headed that way... He called two nights ago looking for Hubby, who was out of town. His speech was slurred and he was nearly incoherent -- sounded awful. I couldn't reach Hubby, so called his sister (SD 29) to alert her and suggest she call him. (She'd already been called by 4 other people.) So SS gets in his car and tries to drive home. Gets lost! Pulls into a gas station and ends up beating up some poor guy who commented something along the lines that SS didn't look like he ought to be driving... (SS has actually fought professionally -- sure hope the poor guy he beat up is OK.) SS does somehow make it home and SD rushes over to try and sober him up and talk him down. Turns out he'd also taken a bunch of pills in addition to heavy alcohol consumption. But crazy BioMom is already there with equally-crazy StepDad -- and they're feeding SS more drinks. (Great judgement, Mom! That's how you handle life's problems -- drown them!) But somehow, everyone survived the night. Anyway, I just got off the phone with SD (Hubby's still out of town) and the current plan is to have a major 'family intervention' with SS when Uncle gets into town right after Christmas -- and possibly even Baker Act him if he pulls another out-of-control stunt before then. But everyone's tired, frustrated and burned out from all the drama... And there's nothing like Christmas to bring out the melancholy if you're so inclined.

Beautiful bird, unfortunate fate. I've never seen an ovenbird out of a forest. I live in the middle of a suburban area pretty far from any big forests. Unfortunate my only sighting was a dead one out here, though. Don't want him to just rot away but if anything why not let the bugs do their job. I might just move the body to a heavily planted area to let the little ecosystem get to work.