Janis, you tell the best stories and no matter how tough a day I've had, I am always humbled by your experiences. I imagine that Neil's impending blindness must be as scary for you as it must be for him. I am so glad that you've found Timmy--could be the start of a wonderful friendship.

My love to you and Neil. And Timmy.

Janis, you're being active on behalf of Neil and as you're already finding out there are ways to make his sight loss managable...ways for him to still keep some if not all parts of his daily life. Timmy sounds a treasure and I bet Neil will find he has a new friend...it sounds as though you have.

Have you actually thought of getting a dog, if Neil would qualify?

Give him a Port Townsend hug from me. Tell him I'm having Pacific NW poached salmon tonight and will think of him :-))
(((N))).

No dog, Sheila, his eyes aren't that bad yet.
He can still get around okay, I am always by his side and I
can warn him of obstacles, curbs, etc. I am considering a cane that
will warn of objects as he gets close.
I'm looking at everything. Lately i'm up most of the night
on the computer, either learning how to take over the
business stuff that Neil always handled or doing research.

Pidge, to tell the truth, it's pretty scary.
Neil has always taken care of me. Now i'm having to do it
all. It isn't the easiest thing in the world to do and I
hope I can do it, i'm giving it my best shot. I don't have
time to figure it all out, i'm just jumping in and hope I
don't drown. Life has been pretty good to me, there isn't
anyone that doesn't have bad things happen to them.

Janis, I always enjoy reading what you write, you express yourself so well. I'm so sorry this time it is such a serious matter.

You are the original lemonade lady in my book Jan. Timmy does sound like a neat guy and I'm anxious to hear how it all works out. Funny,today in Spanish class our teacher was telling us about a restaurant in Switzerland in which all the waiters are blind and it's pitch black in there. It's called The Blind Cow. No lights of any kind are allowed and it's so dark you can't see your own hand in front of your face. You really get a feel for what it's like to be blind and people line up to get in there. I'm sure every little thing that brightens up that darkness makes a world of difference to the person who isn't sighted and you are doing that for Neil.

With today's technology, you can get voice activated stuff & screen readers that will help Neil use the computer (well except for those idiots who still use frames in their websites). And I'll second looking into a dog. At least get on the list.

Timmy sounds like a great resource. I'm glad you've hooked up with him.

All I can see is that pic of you holding a fledgling so gently in your hands----I see it every single day as I think of you and send good thoughts your way, Jan.

You will hold Neil no less gently and you in your wounderful 'Southern Woman' way, will somehow make it seem easy compared to the efforts of most of us humans in trying to make life seem somewhat normal; the square corners of unease rounded by a familiar love.

My heart goes out to you, my sister.
Try to feel the warmth of of an Angels' hand upon your back
and have a moments' peace.
I love you and Neil..

Jan,

I have a friend who is quite a similar situation as you two. When you said sit directly in front of the tv, I could hear Gayle talking. Her husband is part of a program where they'll mail audio books and when you're done you return it via mail, just like a video program like you'd get through Blockbuster or Netflix. Except, it's totally free. I'm going to go ask her what she did so you can do it too? Ok?

Each and every day I see people who have been
given lemons in life.
Timmy has been given a basket full and it lifted my spirit
just to hear him on the other end of the phone, walking me
through the process of making lemonade. It's people like
Timmy who show us the way, that beacon of hope, or light at
the end of a tunnel.
I just hope that in the days and weeks to come, I can give something back.

As aunt Pearl or Eliza used to say, "if it ain't one thing it's another".

Jan, you are simply awesome.

You epitomize the words love and committment.

The ripples you create travel very far.

Jan, when I read your post yesterday, it was just a few minutes after it had appeared and there were no responses from other GP members. Since I am not a "regular" poster, I hesitated to jump in and send a message. However,you and your husband were in my thoughts and prayers yesterday and will continue to be. My husband is experiencing some new, difficult health problems, also, and I, too, wonder about how to help him. Please know that your thoughts and insight are helping me to cope. Sunflowers and hugs to you and Neil.

Jan, mind if I pour a shot of vodka in your lemonade for you? We'll sit on your porch to enjoy it though --- mine's a little chilly right now.

I confess that I have no idea how to respond to this. I'm tempted to offer platitudes and assurances, but the situation really does suck rocks. I am heartened that your attitude doesn't. You really are controlling the only thing you can right now. (((Jan)))

May your heart be full of the song of a thousand wrens...

Jan
I learned the fine art of making lemonade in the past - each recipe is different and each lemonade is unique.
You excel rising to all your challenges, I am awed.
((((((((hugs))))))))and sunflowers to you and Neil.

Hang in there, both of you, and boks on tape are awesome and most libraries carry them.

I am humbled by the out pouring of love I feel from each
and every one of you here. I just play the cards i'm dealt
and go on, it's all anybody can do. Life is unpredictable
there are no set rules. Last night I was making plans to
go the library today to pick up some more books on tapes for Neil
but life happened to interfere.

I had to take Neil back to Atlanta this morning. It was
an emergency. He had another significant bleed in his left
eye and a smaller one in the right.
If nothing else happens, i'll be taking him tomorrow to a
Hematologist to see what, if anything, is going on with his blood.

You are in my thoughts and prayers, both of you.

Jan...you are an amazing woman and it seems like from what I have read you and Neil will indeed rise above any obstacles put in your way...and if i can add a little humor to this, my 87 year old Dad is having problems with macular degeneration...has a bleeding problem that just started...and since he thinks he is still a viral young man i need to talk to him about his viagra use...I'll let you all know how that conversation goes lol.

Good thoughts from here to you and your DH. Sounds like you're handling it well...and you've earned so much love and support from your friends here...I'm awed by the postings. No advice except that perhaps getting the dog before absolutely needed would make it easier to adjust to one another...and as much as you both love animals, it might be a comfort. josh

My mother went totally deaf in one ear from a medical condition, and the other ear is now profoundly hard of hearing from her advancing age. I don't know what to say to her when she complains, as she is not the complaining type. I just ask her if she had to lose either her sight or her hearing which one would she rather keep. Her answer, consistently is her sight.

I also remember my grandmother, who for my entire life was blind. She got on very well through innovation and minimal assistance and lived independently until she was quite old. I remember even as a very young child, closing my eyes and trying to do anything, to try to understand what the world was like for Grandma. I couldn't comprehend it then, and I don't think I can now.

My heart has wrenched each time you talk about the progression of the loss of your husband's sight. I don't have any platitudes to say either except that having people who love you unconditionally is a great blessing, because more shoulders make the weight lighter. He seems to be positive in his outlook, and I'm sure you beside him has helped.