Thank you all for your comments (except for vhehn - seriously, if you want to tell me I'm an idiot (or, conversely, that you are the smartest person in the world), why hide it, just tell me you think I'm a moron and be done with it. You don't know me, and you assume that I'm throwing away perfectly good (and hard-earned, mind you) money because I'm a d*mb*ss. If gloating in front of someone who's down is the way you roll, I'm so glad I don't know you in person.) - 15 hours after the initial discovery of "OMG, it's happened again" (and the resulting pit in our stomaches), our anger and sadness has mellowed a bit, abut we're both intent on salvaging this situation in a professional and drama-free manner. I probably haven't chewed on the situation enough, but after digesting your comments and putting all the pieces together, I'm inclined to do the following: 1) wait for her response (except I really really really want/need to know if we submitted, and/or if we're submitting on Monday, omg......), 2) unless there's a fantastic reason why Friday didn't go as agreed, request an off-site coffee meeting with the architect and synthesize your comments in to a conversation that says, basically: look, we think you're a really talented architect [she is!], but it's clear you're extremely busy, and maybe too busy to devote the type and timing of attention on our project that we need. It's causing us a lot of unnecessary stress and heartburn, especially this early in what we know will be a stressful year and a half [between the rest of planning and the build]. We see a couple of good solutions: a) now that you know how difficult the slipping of schedule has been on not only the timing of our project but on us personally, if you'd like to continue working on our project, we'd like to continue working with you, but we need hard milestones. [and then discuss the milestones, timing, etc....maybe these need to be in writing.....]. 2) if you're just too busy and don't see that changing, we'd be disappointed but would be willing to transfer the plans to another architect to complete - do you have any that you'd recommend? How do we properly transfer the plans? As you can tell, I do soft-pedal rather than throw blame in situations like this - I'm very willing to be firm, but it needs to be in my own voice, and unfortunately (I guess), that's my voice when dealing with people that I actually like (err, you "heard" my other voice above, when responding to others!). chisue - thank you for understanding, and yes, she's licensed, has a nice boutique business, and is actually really talented. she just sucks as client service. We found her as a referral from a neighbor who has (in our opinion) the prettiest new build in the neighborhood - we live in a 50's era rancher town on quarter acre lots in a part of the country where that's considered really big - most of the Bay Area is on 4000-5000 sq ft lots). To his credit, he DID warn us that while she's a terrific architect, she'd be "tough to get a hold of, as she's very busy" (maybe that was neighbor-code for "she'll miss every deadline"). dixiedoodle - agreed, I'm not planning on getting any $ back, so that's not what I'm after. Actually, for the $ we've paid thus far, we ((heart)) the house plan. Yes, in hindsight, the comments that translate to "they're more important than you" are, at best, inappropriate. At the time(s), it seemed more like casual chit-chat. feedingfrenzy, sue36 and sovra - thank you all - your comments and thoughts are the basis for the planned conversation. We actually *would* like her to see the plans through, just need to figure out how to tell her that we can't continue this way, it's too painful. I will go post this in Conversations to see in M-A has additional thoughts. What do you all think of the planned conversation, and how would you tweak it?

I have never had a subscription to a cooking magazine - the only subscription I did have was to Illuminatrice, an Italian lighting magazine, and that was at work. The only magazines that I buy at the newsstand are Italian design magazines, some of which are quite expensive (I used to buy men's Italian fashion magazines, when I was more fashionable), and I have saved every one of them. I also buy Architectural Digest, Interiors, Veranda, etc. when they publish photos of my furniture designs, and I keep these also. My old magazine collection takes up one shelf in my garage, and I do refer to the Italian magazines from time to time for inspiration. I do collect clutter, but books and magazines are not part of that. I have one shelf of cookbooks in the hall next to the kitchen. I once bought a magazine on Feng Shui, but I decided that the magazine was clutter and got rid of it. I spent last week-end trying to declutter my bedroom because I also bought a new mattress that will be delivered tomorrow, and I want my room to look nice. Yesterday I made a runner with the fabric left over from making new drapes for my bedroom (to be able to block out light) and put it on the wide dresser beside my bed. The dresser on the other side of my bed has a runner I made from fabric left over from when I made my bedspread. I find that decorating or trying to coordinate rooms helps me get rid of clutter. However, I did put a bunch of books on the wide dresser using bookends. I don't have room for another bookcase. If I need to get more books, I will get rid of old ones that I have. Lately I have been buying and reading books on Anthropology and early human evolution. I read them at night to help me get to sleep, and so it takes a while to get through them. I cannot stand to watch Hoarders, but I will watch Clean House if I need inspiration to declutter. Making my house and yards look as beautiful as possible is one of my top priorities, and this helps me let go of clutter. I haven't gotten rid of it altogether, however, and so I think it is an on-going process. I have a hard time getting rid of old clothes that no longer fit, and I am convinced that sometime in the near future, they will fit again. Anyway, that is my goal. They may be terribly out of style or inappropriate by that time, however. Getting rid of old clothes is my biggest problem. One of the things I came across yesterday while decluttering was a printout from a Cooking Forum thread from 2005 that I started asking what was in everyone's freezer. It included a post by Ann_T on pitahaya (I happened to have some in my freezer at the time) that she had copied and pasted, bad Google translation and all. The translation was hysterically funny. Lars

You're probably right about the water heater being pre existing, because it's been documented to have problems. I think the warranty is meant to cover things that you discover are wrong with the home after you take possession and not things that are discovered in the inspection. If it was only the hot water heater that needed to be replaced I'd just suck it up and replace it myself. Since the seller isn't willing to give on even meeting you halfway on the garage I'd do an analysis and see if the home is still a good value even needing $4000 of work. The home may be at the top of your price range, but is the home priced $4000 under it's comps or is it also priced at the top of it's comps.

I'm a brand new, ink is still drying on my license agent. However I would like to add a point that has not been addressed. What about safety? I WILL not go show up at a house to meet a buyer I don't know without said buyer showing their face and meeting me at the office first. Now, that sounds paranoid and probably 99.9% of the time unnecessary. Now, after we meet and if they want to be prequalified I will show them all the houses they want to see. If they don't want to do that and need to feel more comfortable with me before doing that I will show them one house. They still will have to meet me at the office first because my safety is more important than a potential sale. Linda made excellent points and seems like a great professional that puts her clients first, I don't see any problem with anything she said. Angieanders: Congratulations! It's great when the end turns out like this.