Is it too soon to talk about holiday meals? I need help!
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Is it too early to talk about Valentine's Day?
Comments (30)Claudia, What a great story! I hope you make it that long too. I think that would be anyone's wish who still liked their spouse. It sounds like you had great role models and a lot of incentive to win your bet. Our anniversary is December 20. We got married at our old farmhouse, and the water froze that day. The whole system was rather antiquated, and our water was pumped up to the house with a tractor into a cistern. Actually, it was the tractor that froze, not the water. You know, washing my hair was an adventure. The pastor asked if I promised to ''love, honor and obey'' and I said, ''OBEY!!! I'm not promising to OBEY.'' He told me he wouldn't marry us unless I did, so I told him I'd say it, while I crossed my fingers and offered a ''You know what I mean!'' Good Grief. It was after all, 1980! We were standing next to our new wood stove that had hedge wood in it and it was HOT. We were still figuring out how much wood we needed to load it with, so we were sweating. Profusely. I kept asking everyone to back away from the stove. Meanwhile, in the kitchen, you could almost see your breath, it was so cold. My cake was quite FIRM, and hard to cut. Those were the days. I will say, I'm glad we've moved on from there!...See MoreWhat is the most memorable holiday meal you have ever had?
Comments (51)A few years back my wife and I were traveling on business in Brazil over Thanksgiving. A professor my wife was working with took us and several of the students to a churrascaria for dinner on Thanksgiving. (A churrascaria is a restaurant where servers roam around the restaurant with skewers of various cooked meats, continually stopping at each table to carve off some to everyone at the table) While there I mentioned that it was the US holiday of Thanksgiving and described it to the professor and the Brazilian students in general terms: get together with family and/or friends and have a large meal together, and described the "traditional" Thanksgiving meal. I was merely trying to make conversation, and make the point that what we were doing was pretty similar to the Thanksgiving tradition. However the professor responded "I'll see what I can do" and flagged the head waiter over, and spoke to him in rapid Portuguese. The waiter responded to us "We don't have any turkey but I'll see what we can do." and disappeared into the kitchen. About 10 minutes later he emerged from the kitchen followed by a server carrying a large skewer of meat, he presented it to us with a big beaming smile saying "This is as close as we could get to turkey. It's Ostrich." It didn't taste even a little like turkey, but it was delicious....See MoreI need to talk about my adult step-daughter
Comments (5)Shakti, I have to wonder if you have ever been in a stepfamily! Rob says he has been the father figure to his stepchildren for 28 years! That's hardly "only a friend." Would you tell an adoptive parent that they were "only a friend"? It sounds like he stepped in when their biological father had done them some pretty awful physical and psychic harm--that's not "just a friend" stuff, either. Sure biology and genes are important, but the day to day raising can be almost as powerful. Rob, I am closer to your age probably than some of the other wonderful posters here, and I might be able to offer some insight? Wish I could be of more help. One thing that occurred to me reading your anguished words is that you are at the age where we start to think more about our place in the world, what we have done, life review and all that. And seeing where we are peched on a family tree is so important to us all of a sudden. Whereas the young people in our lives are intent on making their own families, making their own way in the world--it sometimes feels like they have no time for us, like we are no longer important in their lives. And it sounds like although you feel your SD strongly prefers your wife over you, it also sounds like she is "buying" the favor, making herself indispensible by providing all those practical services for SD. (Didn't mean for that to sound negative--it's the way of the world.) Is there a reason you don't go along to visit your grandkids? (I didn't say "stepgrandkids" because I know so many stepparents who would never dream of calling their SKs their "children," but for some reason are comfortable without the "step-" with the next generation. Maybe because the grandkids never knew a time without them--or maybe because grandkids already have four grandparents, why not add another one?) Here's something else I discovered as I was thinking these things through in my own life. With my SDs, I am more quick to perceive slights and insults. But when it is my own children I find myself thinking "oh they're just kids." I try to apply that test when it seems like my SDs are ignoring me or not as receptive as I would like to an activity or something--I say "what if it was my biokids" and then it doesn't hurt so much--I find myself in the "they're just kids" place. Have you talked to your stepdaughter about missing her and the grandkids? Do you and your wife ever babysit? Your relationship with your grandkids will soon grow on its own, apart from their mom....See MoreIs it too soon to talk about replacing lawn grass after the freeze?
Comments (11)Oh, man! I read that as Denton, Colorado and started feeling like I was in the Twilight Zone. St Aug should not do will in Colorado. I think roselee should be fine. The DFW area gets super cold temps almost every year, and they manage to cultivate St Aug through it all. The second snow melted today and I still have some green spots in the Floratam. I also installed some Raleigh St Aug late last year. I have not ventured back to where that stuff is. Maybe tomorrow. But it looked amazing compared to the Floratam elsewhere. Raleigh is more cold tolerant. In Bandera we had many hours at mid single digit temps, and I have some confidence that both types will come back. If you do lose some grass, we got the Raleigh at Millburger's Nursery at the corner of 1604 and Bulverde Rd (inside the loop). They sell 7 pallets of Raleigh per day to walk ins and another 7 pallets to the professionals. What that means to you, as a consumer, is that they have the freshest turf you can get. Just be sure, if you need new grass, that the location is ready NOW to put it down. Do all the prep work before you buy the grass, and put it down as soon as you get home. If you want to replace the grass with Floratam, you have to special order it. I think the price is the same, but they don't keep it in stock. Everyone's "elderly" is their own. I can't tell you how to feel, because I see people younger than I am using a cane or walker and who seem to be very elderly. But as for me, about a year ago I realized that I was starting to feel elderly with back issues and upper body weakness. I was one of those people who could not get myself up again using just my legs. I started doing some twisting exercises, deep squats, and slant push ups. The twisting fixed my back the first day - apparently I needed a chiropractic adjustment to unpinch a nerve, which I did DIY. The squats have allowed me to get up again if I fall. I do 30 squats while I brush my teeth every morning. The push ups toned up the upper body, some core, and just made it easy to hustle bags of fertilizer and flats of sod around. I do 30 of those after the squats. We also walk the dog every day at a local park. That's a full half mile!!! (Boerne has a 0.5 K "race" every year, so this is almost two of those!! The race is from one bar to another bar, ;-) ) Anyway, I'm so glad I started this minimal exercise program. I no longer worry about being elderly (70 now). I probably should worry a little, but I don't. Other than that I'm sedentary here at the computer. I do try to stand up and move every hour or less. That seems to help, ever so little, but some. Your back yard is beautiful, by the way. In general terms, what part of SA are you in? As soon as we can we're moving back to the Northwood area inside 410 west of Harry Wurzbach....See More- last monthlast modified: last month
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