Agnespuffin There's no doubt she's retarded but she may be beginning dementia as well. She isn't interacting with the other residents because she really doesn't know how. The rehab is in the same section as assisted living and it seems most of those people are fairly intelligent from what I've seen. In the nursing home section most of them are about like vegetables. The ones who aren't don't have their mind. She interacts with the employees but they get paid to interact! Some of them say they just love her but I'm sure there's some who probably don't really like her. As for being alone all day, she is never alone. I think she'd talk all day long if she had someone to talk to but there's only so much you can talk to her about. I rack my brain trying to find something to talk to her about. I don't think anything will break the phone habit. I think that's the main reason she wants to come home so bad because she says everyone there is very good to her. I think talking on the phone makes her feel normal somehow and I know it makes her feel powerful. So does spending money. She doesn't have a lot of it either. She lives off SSI. They did have a small nest egg but when my sister took over Dad's guardianship she went through it very quickly. She's addicted to spending money too. Between what the VA pays her and Dad's check she gets around 1,500.00 a month for taking care of him and knowing my sister the way I do I'm sure she wouldn't be taking care of him if she wasn't getting the money. I'm sure you're wondering how Dad gets a VA check with his severe retardation. The fact is the military goofed up by keeping him too long. He was a good looking young man and didn't look retarded at all. They probably just thought to start with that he was just a dumb country hick. Someone in charge was't paying enough attention or wasn't too smart themselves. Twiz-- You're probably right about the NH but I can't make myself do that yet and I don't think DH would want that at this time in spite of the situation. I have to keep a firm hand with her to keep her in line. She's a little better about the phone since she knows I can see every call she makes on the bill. We also have unlimited calling for a flat fee now and that helps a lot. Actually there were a few people who like for her to call but 2 of them passed away in the last 6 months. There's a few people who expect her to call every few weeks. I think she's finally getting the message that some people don't want to talk to her. I do intend to leave her in rehab as long as possible because she needs it and so do we. She'll probably be there another 3 weeks at least. We're taking advantage of the time to just be together and also take care of some business matters. I only have Mom. My sister has dad about 800 miles away. There's no way either of us could take care of the both of them. Mom didn't want to go there and Dad didn't want to come here so it worked out for the best. It's sad to say but I don't care much for my sister because she's a manipulative very controling person so we talk very little. When we did talk a lot it was very emontionaly draining for me. I don't need that. I'm already working with her Social Worker/Case Manager at the area agency on aging to arrange respite care so we can do some of the things we want such as going fishing in the new bass boat we bought last fall. That pretty thing hasn't even been in the water yet! If we can pull everything together we plan to go to Canada in August for 2 weeks and maybe Lake Erie for a few days in Sept. As soon as the weather permits we plan to go fising in the local lakes and river at least once a week. I talked to the case worker this morning and it seems we can get respite care for like 3 days a month and up to 15 days at a time. Mom will soon be 81 and with all her health problems I'm sure she wouldn't be living today if it wasn't for the excellent care I give her. I know I can't physically handle her with her weight being what it is and I've told her this. As much as I'd hate it when the time comes that she needs lifting I'll have to send her to a NH. I already have a bad back. She loves sympathy and attention and a few months ago she was insinuating to an aide that I was mean to her. That was because I won't let her have a little dog that she can't take care of and I won't because we just lost one last Oct. and I'm still greiving over him. I told her if she thought I was mean maybe should go live with my sister and she would find out what mean is. I do beleive my sister would be abusive to her. I apologized to the aid for my outburst but I told her I have nothing to hid but I can't tolorate that kind of manipulative behavior. I think the aid may have said something to her supervisor who is the visiting nurse because the next time she came to visit she made the comment that she told the aids they are only in the home for a short time and don't really know what goes on. This aid was a fill in for her regular aid. All the regular aids and the nurses know I would never abuse her or allow anyone else to. I'm not looking for sympathy or any prizes or martyrdom, I just needed to vent a little. I don't think she'd live very long in a NH and as I said I don't think my DH would want that anymore than I do at this time. I just have to continue to be firm with her and take the necessary steps to see that DH and I can have some quality time together.

OHHHH you guy's are soooo funny!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you! You all know that I love you too. Let me start off with Amy. Haha, I did what DeeMarie did and opened my package up in bed - nice way to start the day. Amy gave me notecards with her artwork on them - so you already know how beautiful they are. My birthday card was a beautiful underwater scene with a birthday cake LOL. It is so cute. Amy also gave me a gift certificate to shop at her site - can't wait to go there and check it out again. Amy - thank you, you will never know how much your gift means to me - you should've kept the envelopes, I don't think I will be able to ever part with the cards LOL. I sat there trying to pick a favorite and couldn't (leaning towards the pink roses and orchids) - they are all so great. You are so talented. Marci - thanks for the 50 confetti, I decorated a table this morning with it LOL. Love the GIF, of course it is coordinated with my confetti - you are one of a kind. Several months ago I told each of my immediate family NOT to give me any surprise party - you don't know how embarrassed and uncomfortable I am with that. I begged my DH to squash anyone's attempt to do so LOL. I think I'm safe. I celebrated Saturday night with close friends, Sunday with some girlfriends and last night DH took me to our favorite italian restaurant in Saratoga Springs. I wanted to go out last night as we are going to a slide show tonight - friends went hiking in Nepal/Mt. Everest. DH gave me tickets to see my favorite performer BETTE MIDLER on 3/17, we are only 3 rows from the stage (on the floor) YIPPPPPEEEEEEE. Kathy - very funny - you have my kind of sense of humor. Thanks. NH Suzanne - I'm waiting for the AARP envelope any day now LOL, thanks so much for the great e-card. Love you too. Maddie - I knew you and Dee would be serenading me this morning LOL. I am also honored to have you as my friend. DeeMarie - I was right, you really are a brat (old person comment) LOL. Thanks so much for the song - I have to say your singing voice is really improving LOL. Okay this isn't funny, but my lower back hurts me and I usually have no pains - this is just a coincidence, RIGHT???

Hahaha............My computer was acting up (or my high-speed internet was in SLO-MO, I'm not sure), and I didn't realize that any of my post had appeared. I gave up trying to post and figured I would just check back later and try again. Tikanas - I can't wait to hear about your DS's reaction to his party. Have fun. Raeanne - You were close about the umbrella!! Here is the rest of my original post: and I didn't have the towel, umbrella or roll of paper towels that I usually keep in the trunk. I dried myself off with some napkins. I had to laugh though, cause I was really, really wet and I looked really, really funny!! LOL We had a fairly uneventful trip to take DD to school. I have talked to her every day and she seems to be settling in nicely. She is complaining about having to walk everywhere, but she'll get used to it. Her roommates are both really nice and they have already met some cute guys who live in their building. I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing!! LOL (((Besh))) - I hope you are finding the strength to get through this weekend. NHSuzanne - Be careful with those bales of hay. Isn't this the time of year that you got sick after handling all that hay?? I will be thinking about you. Gotta run and get out of these wet clothes, but I wanted to check in while DS was busy elsewhere. Hello to everyone! Marci PS - I never did get out my wet clothes. I got busy and just air dried. DH looked at me strangely when he got home (from helping a friend move) until I looked in a mirror and realized how bedraggled I still looked. Oh well, after 27 years of marriage, he has definitely seen me at my best and my worst. LOL

We had a Jotul DV gas insert installed into our prefab fireplace a few months ago. Some impressions that might be useful to you: They start heating gradually and after a little while start to feel like a blast furnace. But it's radiant heat, so that the farther you are from the source the less heat you feel. Therefore, a means of circulating the air in the room is a good idea. We have an old fashioned Hunter ceiling fan that we've owned for over 20 years, and it's still going strong. The nice thing about this fan is that you can "twist" the position of the paddles so that instead of blowing air down, which you want in warm weather, it blows air up. That produces a gentle circulation of air throughout the room and evens out the temperature. The other thing you should definitely consider is to get a remote control thermostat. I think the remotes are better than the ones you install in the wall, because you never know in advance the best position for the remote that will give you the best result. Finally, because of a disappointing experience we have had with the installation of our insert (we're still waiting for a final piece that, fortunately, only affects appearance, not operation or safety), I think it's very, very important to select an installer who can independently demonstrate that he knows everything he needs to know about the fireplace you select. If a GC has expressed doubts about a particular fireplace that you like, it's probably because he doesn't know it and is not sure he can do it. Our insert was a really complicated installation that took over a day. A whole fireplace is likely to be even more demanding. Good luck with your selection.