What about a cordon bleu casserole? (similar to the one I use which I would have to scan: https://www.the-girl-who-ate-everything.com/chicken-cordon-bleu-casserole/

Rather than a green salad, since you already have a salad, how about peas (frozen) with mint or if you cook green beans the southern way (ie. cooked much more than is common in these parts) they would be nice too. I've found that the older people that I have cooked for are not huge fans of green salad.

Perhaps overkill? have you asked mom? how about roast chicken, mashed potato, green salad. Cake

Shepherd pie?

As we age some of our teeth separate from each other just a tiny bit, but enough to see every food item mentioned get stuck between the teeth or under the gum. Which sometimes happens to me.

Gums can shrink under dentures causing problems with eating.

Breads turn to dough in the teeniest space. Basically anything with texture. Rice, salads, all meats, raw veggies.

Can you ask what foods won't bother her?

I would also suggest asking her what she wants. My mother insists she isn't a picky eater but when we go out she always gives the waiter a laundry list of special requests. :)

If it were me, my goal would not be so much to serve a complete meal where every element meets her needs precisely. She may not even want that. In addition there are other guests who need to be fed. So my goal would be to give her whatever she wants and to provide a reasonable meal for the rest of the crowd

I guess it depends on your situation but when my Dad was still living, on the rare occaision I had to cook for him - I went out of my way to serve him a lot of things he liked. Any other attendees had ample opportunity to eat out or cook the things they liked themselves so those meals were all about Dad!

If you serve a chicken casserole, it is likely to include some kind of starch and/or veggies, so I doubt you will need so many dishes. A green salad and dessert, maybe soft dinner rolls and you are done. Something as casual as chicken pot pie could fit the bill -- carrots, potatoes, peas, mushrooms and red bell peppers in the one we make, all diced and soft. Use additional pie crust to put a 90 or some little rosettes on top and make it special. Chicken tetrazzini has peppers, mushrooms and pasta. You could sneak in another vegetable to make it more all in one and still easy to eat. Use a different shape pasta if spaghetti would be an issue. Green salad with some dried cranberries and apples, a seasonal vinagrete, soft dinner rolls optional, and your cake and ice cream - Done. You can go fancier, but I don't know that you need to.

My dad would have loved a meatloaf because my mother made it with oats, ketchup and mustard -- a different flavor profile than the brown gravy type that he would get elsewhere. I agree that asking her if there is a favorite she would like is a good idea -- but if you have to transport it all, keep it simple.

When my MIL was in her 90's, her favorite food was soup. She had difficulty chewing a lot of foods because of her teeth and soup was not only easy for her to eat but it tasted good too. As I recall, MIL didn't have a very big appetite at that age and was happy to make a meal out of a bowl of soup and some bread.

Maybe you could include a soup or chowder as part of the meal along with soft rolls. I think your chicken casserole, rice salad and maybe a veggie would be nice for the other guests to give them some variety and maybe your mother would want some of that too. I don't think you need a green salad if you serve the rice salad. I don't know about others, but I tend to go off of green salads once the fall weather arrives.

I also remember that as she got older, MIL developed quite a sweet tooth, so I imagine the b-day cake and ice cream will be much appreciated. Happy 90th birthday to your Mom!

What about starting with a Roasted Tomato Soup, or Squash Bisque? Both could be made ahead, so you’re only reheating. Pick up the makings for a nice assortment of breads, soft rolls and some crustier types too at the bakery. I like the idea of shepherd’s pie.

As we age, our sense of smell and taste decreases, requiring increased amounts of salt and sugar to get the same taste.

Ditto everything Mdln said. But I'd use a smaller pasta than spaghetti to make for easier eating.

My mother was missing molars so many proteins were a problem. She would have loved the salmon. The very small salad shrimp immaculately fresh can be good in alfredo. Salisbury steak with gravy, mashed potatoes. A nicely made and seasoned mac and cheese. Chicken or turkey, but the dark meat not breast....just about anything you could make in the way of a casserole with chicken thighs could work well (i.e. chicken pot pie). Peas. Green beans. A squash or sweet potato dish if she likes squash. Quiche. A filled pasta with plenty of sauce, stuffed pasta shells. Leafy salads were sometimes a problem. Not popular, but jello salads would also work.

I'd make the dinner about her and not worry about guests who can eat anything, anytime anywhere.

Mom was particularly fond of ice cream. For her 90th, we took her to an old fashioned ice cream parlor and ate like little kids. Had the best time ;) How I'd love one more year to do that again but she's no longer with us.

Let us know how the party turns out....Best of luck and don't stress, put the emphasis on fun and just being with her.

ETA: No seniors of particularly upward ages there, but my SIL had a few of us over for a Fall dinner last year that was fun and quite good. She had a salad, may have been her mock caesar and for that I'd tear the romaine quite small. Two kinds of soup, and grilled sandwiches with our choices of cheese and meats (she has a large panini press). That menu or something close could work well with your mother.

Thanks everyone.

I'd like to stick to casserole-type dishes for ease of transport there and back home. My brother does most of the cooking for her and it is a lot of traditional meals (a meat, potato, frozen veg, green salad). The problem I have with casseroles is what to serve with them.

mtn, shepherd's pie is her favourite, but I make a big one to take her about once a month.

Asking her isn't easy because she is deaf and can't use the phone (see thread on hearing aids :-) and she might say yes or no to something, but I doubt if she could come up with the name of a dish. She is the opposite of a picky eater (her staple was a tin of drained tuna over cottage cheese) so I know she will be happy with anything as long as she can chew it. It's more about making what she can chew appetizing for the other guests.

I like the look of the cordon bleu casserole, but if I go with that, I'd not do the mashed potatoes. When I was thinking potatoes, I was picturing a thinner sauced (white wine maybe) chicken casserole to spoon over.

Let me think about the soup idea. I'd have to bring bowls, but that might be doable.

I also like the meatloaf idea. I could even do mini meatloaves and she'd be able to freeze any extra.

Aww, Daisy, I understand. Happy Birthday to her!

Something she can freeze extra of seems nice.

BTW, It is funny that Neko posted that recipe, unless I got it from here. I have made it a few times, but with a significant alteration; I make it over a bed of cooked elbow macaroni, and add chopped spinach. I just made this for my DDs and dropped it off with them. I made 10 mini loaf pans. Can post if you'd like.

My mother also has issues eating due to teeth/bone deterioration under her dentures and I just had a year of dental work that required soft foods through the majority of the 12 months so I can relate to and appreciate that you want to make something she can eat easily and enjoy.

Have you considered stuffed shells or lasagna or eggplant parmesan? -- all will work well with issues chewing -- and just as importantly, you can make them at home, transport 1.5 hr and then cook at your mom's house. I always add spinach to my shells/lasagna so a chopped salad (so much easier to chew than a regular salad) and bread will round the meal out well .. though for a bonus, i especially like green beans with lemon and garlic with baked italian dishes.

I was thinking quiche or a pasta dish too. To make things even easier, Stouffers has a really yummy frozen veggie lasagna that was always a hit at our family celebrations - much better than the traditional red sauce and meat kind, IMO.

Maybe instead of green salad, a fresh fruit salad of some sort? Most fruits are nice and soft to chew.

Timely conversation. I'm heading to NYC tomorrow with a suitcase full of frozen meals for my parents (both are 89). They are getting tons of eggplant parm (their request) and several large tupperware containers of bacon mac and cheese. They also request biscotti, scones and cookies (all frozen and good to go.) When I think about it, all the foods I send tend to be easy to eat (they dunk the biscotti).

They also love beef or lamb stew. My mom makes risotto often, also they love fresh ravioli. And the other staple is roast chicken from their local market.

Maybe my parents' preferences can help with your meal?

Neko, I probably did get it from you here! I like it. I agree with you about spinach; in my mind adding spinach makes it a meal so that in a pinch it can stand alone.

But, as I mentioned in a brunch thread, I have sometimes gone too far with that --- a dozen very green mini crustless quiches finally shattered the illusion that I could just keep pushing it!

And yes, goodness, for the birthday girl, I agree .... anything goes. They do turn into kids again with their sweets!

I've found that butternut squash soup served in cups or short glasses is a good appetizer. No utensils needed.

I thought I posted this earlier, so if it ends up a dupe post, apologies.

When I read the you were looking for a chicken dish to go with potatoes, I thought of this recipe for Cider Braised Chicken with Caramelized Onions.

And, because @Funkyart mentioned stuffed shells, I feel compelled to share Pumpkin and Pesto Cheese Stuffed Shells

I made this pumpkin sausage pasta for a school faculty lunch once -- transported in a warmed crockpot, but it could also be heated in the oven if needed. It's a perfect pasta dish this time of year. We always use turkey Italian sausage.

Yum! Lots of these recipes are going into my must try folder even if I don't use them for the bday.

Mtn, yes please. I would love the recipe.

jojoco, I'm picturing the drug sniffing dogs being completely distracted by your suitcase.

funky, stuffed shells is one of my faves and would be really easy with some nice bread and a salad. Lasagne was my first thought, but I know my brother makes it lot for her. Shells might be different enough.

The Stouffer casseroles are tempting and I could go the pre-made route, but I've got all of Friday off to cook and just can't justify not making something from scratch.

CHICKEN CORDON BLEU CASSEROLE 2.0

• 3 cups of chicken from 3 skinless bone in, skin on chicken breasts, poached then shredded
• ¾ cups cubed ham (~1/4 lb deli ham sliced thick)
• 4 cups cooked elbows; cooked al dente, and drained
• Spinach — 1/2 box fresh, stems removed and chopped

CHEESE SAUCE:

• 6 tablespoons unsalted butter
• 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 3 cup whole milk
• ½ c half and half
• 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
• 1 tablespoon lemon juice
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic paste
• 1/4 teaspoon salt (add more to taste)
• 1 1/2 cups shredded Swiss cheese, (~6 ounces)
• 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

1. Toss cooked pasta with butter and layer into casseroles (see #3 below)
2. For the cheese sauce: In a saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat. Sprinkle the flour on top and cook 1-2 minutes or until the mixture gets dry. Whisk in the milk slowly. Add the mustard, lemon juice, garlic and salt. Simmer for 3-5 minutes whisking constantly until mixture thickens. Remove from heat and stir in the Swiss and Parmesan cheese. Taste and add more salt if needed.
3. Assemble into mini loaf pans

• ½ cup pasta
• 3T sauce
• ¼ c chicken
• ⅓ c spinach, not packed
• 1 heaping T ham
• ⅓ c sauce
• Parm - dusting

4. Cook 10 mins at 375 then broil just till brown

YIELD - 10 mini loaf pans

The Rachel Ray Pumkin Sausage Pasta that lascatx posted is one I make often. So often I dont look at it and had forgotten it had a real recipe behind it. It’s great.

There are so many ways to make stuffed shells -- I make mine meatless with spinach and a lot of basil in the ricotta-mozz stuffimg. Local's recipe with pesto cheese with pumpkin sounds great too. I am sure you find a variation that is different enough to feel special!

When I make them to travel, I don't cook them first-- I assemble and sauce and then cook at the destination (though my destination is only 30 min away)