Anxious about being the noisy upstairs neighbour
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Are we inconsiderate/noisy neighbors?
Comments (26)We live on the top floor with our son. We are usually homebodies and are always at home. We never have anybody over except for my son's cousins for sleepovers and only happens several months in between they have one. Our downstairs neighbor is a certified crazy lady. She came up to our door and in a loud voice accused me of trying to ruin her whole life. She said we were too noisy and we need to keep it down and she's been holding it in for months. I told her I was sorry she felt that way and I would work on it. I had a headache and I am not confrontational and a fight with this woman was not happening. The only thing that happened that was loud was my son falling over on his chair. Happened once that morning. She next came up and talked to my husband to complain about rolling noises she kept hearing. It was my son playing with a suitcase. She as pleasant to my husband and talked to him for twenty minutes. Talked about life and her kids. Also sneaked in that our toilet seat was loud and she could hear it downstairs. My husband said he had no idea and would try to remember. So we did. My son I cannot account for as he forgets all the time but he is reminded when I see or hear him in the bathroom. We have always been careful with our son making too much noise. He cannot run in hallways. No stomping or heavy footfalls, no screaming or yelling. No slamming of doors. No loud tv sounds. We even watch to make sure we put on our jeans carefully so our foot doesn't fall too loudly when it comes down. Anyway, she came up a third time during the day to complain to me. Apparently, we were too loud again. Only thing I was doing was working on dough on our dining table to make into Christmas ornaments. I wasn't even slapping it onto the table. Just kneading it a lot. No, hey um you're making too much noise again. Immediate screaming, yelling, cursing, and accused me also of rearranging furniture all the time. She threatened to call the cops on me. I told her to go ahead and do it. Later on, when I headed out, I could hear her clearly talking to the downstairs neighbor that she didn't know where I came from and what language I spoke to which I interrupted and said I spoke English very well and understand a lot of the language. She probably realized I had heard her and made an excuse that she was referring to me being psycho and that's why she said I didn't know anything. Oh, I am Asian by the way, full on Asian, immigrant, moved here permanently because my husband lives here. He is white by the way. I don't understand how she can call me psycho when our only interaction was 10 minutes from the 1st time she complained. She also talked to my husband pleasantly which surprised me and kinda made me a little mad that she was nice to him and not to me. I am home all the time, my husband works all day. So I honestly think she knows who she is going to talk to at certain times of the day. Daytime me, nighttime and weekends potentially my husband. We've lived in the same apartment for almost four years now. And while it might not be fun to be downstairs, her being so confrontational and being choosy with who to be that way with, has been no laugh trip either. We are being accommodating to her situation and we do not have any quarrels with other neighbors. If she can be nicer with her requests, with me not just my husband, then we would be more than happy to be more accommodating....See MoreBeing the noisy neighbor
Comments (48)Hello all, I want to weigh in on this whole debate about "who's Right to peaceful living conditions are worth more". My wife and I live in a fully furnished first floor apartment below a 20-something Guy, his 20-something girlfriend, and his 3 year old child also living in a furnished apartment. The building is older, but the units are in GREAT shape overall, and the rent isn't too bad considering either! My wife and I moved in about 4-5 weeks before the upstairs tenants and had lived in peace before they came to move in. Over the past 8+ months there has been an ever evolving increase in noise from the child as he grows and becomes more active as kids do.We are in year 2 of our lease after having resigned it due to having been so busy planning and preparing for our wedding (by ourselves for a 300+ person wedding list of guests) which took place in May of this year. It is now mid-October, and we re-signed in June. I should also note that my wife was diagnosed over 10 years ago with General Anxiety Disorder which can cause Panic Attacks, Raised Blood Pressure, Insomnia, Seizures, and other physical problems in some people. My wife only has been affected by some of the less severe symptoms, but we also don't wish to push our luck in the matter. In the early stages, my wife and I were very friendly with the new neighbors, having written them a kindly worded letter about the noise. We included our phone numbers and and invited all 3 of them over for pizza in our apartment to get to know each other. This friendly cooperation worked well for a while, but the noise began to become louder and more frequent. We proceeded, via text messages, by asking them on infrequent occasions to quiet down when things didn't burn out on their own in a tolerable amount of time. Again, this worked for a short while, but things progressed again over time. This is when we began involving our Landlord. She did make a few "Courtesy Calls" on our behalf, again effective for a brief amount of time but again the efforts dwindled in effectiveness over time. Several months ago, our Landlord purchased area rugs for the 2nd floor to be put down. The intention was to lower the noise in high traffic area's as well as to provide a baffled play surface for the child. Again it worked for a short time, but evolved into little more than a "soft Landing" for the kid to jump or run and dive onto. The use of the carpeted area has also become less frequent as the wood floors seem to be "fair Game" again as well. Let me overview the noise itself for clarity before I move on. There is regular running from one room to another. Toys are constantly thrown, dropped, dragged, and otherwise in contact with the wood floors. There is frequent "playful Yelling" from the child. The parents often toss shoes and other things onto the landing in the middle of the front stairs which is directly above my bedroom. They also allow the child to play with toys on the stairs and run up and down them to collect the toys. The parents are not innocent either. They often like to have guests over until late at night, slam doors and windows, and slam the washer/dryer doors. Now let me address those who will say "This is reasonable and normal day to day noise caused by living." To that I say.... Yep.... you're RIGHT.... ish. I agree, kids will play, noise will be heard from walking, televisions, use of the stairs, and use of the furnishings and appliances. That is all fine and well. It is also not the grounds for our complaint. So anyone who is going to dispute me on those grounds should move on as I won't give refute of that type a seconds worth of my time. Now for the real consequences and guidelines of real life here. THE REMEDY: Our Landlord has since stopped helping to resolve this issue saying "She is frustrated with them and does not know what to do." At that point my wife and I had already been documenting excessive noise for some case, and contacted an attorney for advice. This is what we have been instructed to do. 1) KEEP A PAPER TRAIL OF PROOF! This includes a "Noise Log or Diary" which should include the Date, Time, Location, Duration, and description of each event in reasonable detail. You should also record any conversations, text messages, or other communications between yourself, the noisy party or parties, your Landlord or Property Management, as well as the Police. All of these documents may be needed if you seek further legal action or protection should you (A) receive an eviction notice or (B) choose to attempt breaking your lease to leave. You should continue keeping records throughout the whole process until an agreement has been reached, the problem has been resolved, or legal actions become necessary. It also may be necessary to call the police if the noise is exceptionally aggressive, your personal property or apartment has been damaged in any way (IE: A cracked Ceiling or picture which has fallen off the wall due to the actions from the other tenants), you have been retaliated against because of a complaint, or have been threatened in any way. Be sure to Note any responding officers Name and Badge Number and get a copy of the complaint form or at least get the complaint number for the report if it can not be provided at that time. 2)KEEP IN TOUCH WITH YOUR LANDLORD OR PROPERTY MANAGERS Keeping the person or company with whom you signed a legal contract with is important. If your complaints are legitimate, they have an obligation to uphold the terms of your lease which may mean penalising the "Noisy Neighbors" as it is often a clear violation of the lease agreement they have likely signed as well. 3)SEND A CERTIFIED LETTER OF COMPLAINT Although sometimes notes slid under a door, a letter left in the mailbox, or even a letter sent via normal mail are effective ways to deal with a loud neighbor without a face to face confrontation, a Certified Letter is best. The reason is because it can be traced. Make sure you send a Restricted Certified letter which guarantees that ONLY a named Person or Persons can receive the letter and MUST Sign to accept the letter. This obviously doesn't mean they will open, read, or otherwise acknowledge the letter and it's contents, but it proves you have made every reasonable effort to inform them. In my case, I was instructed to Send a letter to the Landlord AND the Upstairs Tenants. The Upstairs Neighbors because they could be taken to claims court for damages and it helps to prove they have been made aware of the situation in a formal way, and the landlord because they may be in breach of contract for not upholding the terms and conditions of the lease A note about what to include in your letter(s): - Make sure you ARE Professional and are NOT Confrontational. - State the problem at hand NOT using Opinions or Personal Statement but with FACTS as well as a short but concise description of your complaints. - Make sure to state that "Although reasonable efforts have been made to resolve the problem(which your documentation MUST legitimately support), no resolution has been made." Also State: "If the problem is not resolved, the Local Authorities will be contacted and legal actions may be taken against them due to the ongoing nuisance." - Lastly it may be good to include your postal address or an email address which the other party or parties may contact you at if they wish to negotiate a remedy without involving the authorities. You may leave a telephone or cell phone number, but it is recommended that you either Record the Call (you must inform the person being recorded you are doing so at the very onset of the call) or state only text messages will be accepted. 4) GIVE REASONABLE TIME FOR DELIVERY AND ACTION You must be patient, as hard as it may be at this point. Time must be given to process and deliver the certified letter as well as to receive the receipt of delivery to you. You also must give the other Party or Parties reasonable time to stop doing whatever it is they are doing and or do make any necessary physical changes needed to accommodate that. Physical changes may mean moving a shoe rack, purchasing and installing carpeting, or rearranging bedrooms . Although it varies from area to area, 30 days seems to be the rule of thumb on this matter. Some area's are as short as 10 days from the receipt of the Certified letter of complaint. 5)DECIDE WHEN ENOUGH IS ENOUGH: At some point when you have exhausted all of your time, effort, and energy you have to decide where to go from here. You should talk to your Landlord or Management Company and see if they will let you out of your lease and find out for sure what, if any, penalties they will actually impose on you for doing so. You probably have provisions in your lease stating this, but sometimes sympathy may be given if the situation warrants it and you have a reasonable person to deal with. On the other hand, you may have to take the proverbial hammer in hand and stand up for your rights. This may mean giving notice and terminating the lease yourself. If you do this, be sure your are prepared to defend yourself if the Landlord or Management decides to take you to court. You could also go to a District Court and file a Criminal Complaint against the Loud Neighbors or a Civil Suit against them as well as the Landlord for damages or breach of contract. This is something you really need to speak to an attorney about. Don't shoot yourself in the foot by being unprepared or misinformed. Keep in mind the court system is often slow and almost always expensive even if you decide to represent yourself. It may be less expensive to pay the early termination fee's to break your lease and wash your hands of everything once and for all. Lastly I want to briefly describe your rights as they have been described to me" "Quiet Enjoyment" VS "Peaceful Possession" My understanding is that Quiet Enjoyment refers to the noise and comfort reasonably entitled to any person or persons living in a paid for unit. Peaceful Possession refers more to the provisions for and against access by your landlord/Management or any others recruited by them. An example would be: "A water line bursting" would not warrant notice of entry as it is deemed an "emergency" whereas an Unannounced visit to "inspect the condition of your refrigerator" is not an emergency and in most cases requires at least 24 hours notice being given. "Noise Ordinances" Every town and City will have some regulations in regards to how much, what kind, and what time certain noises are OK and when they are not OK. Generally these prohibit loud music or shouting, and state that the noise levels should decrease during certain hours. Check with your Code Office for specific details in your area. "Noise Pollution" Is any noise that is deemed unlawful by local ordinances OR harmful to Human Well-Being. For example an Air Horn being blasted outside your bedroom window next to your head could damage your hearing or send you into shock. This is harmful to your health and well-being. "Nuisance" This is the grounds on which I have the best shot for results in my situation. It is well documented that reasonable efforts have been made to resolve an ongoing problem on my part without results. It is also so documented that it is an ongoing problem which has been, at times, a direct retaliation to a complaint. This falls under the legal term "Nuisance." Also in my case, I can prove that my wife has been put through a hardship in regards to her G.A.D., and that my sleep and stress levels have been negatively affected as well. Both of these things are grounds for "Pain and Suffering" claims in a Civil Lawsuit as they are related to the Nuisance. "Breach of Contract" Your lease is a legally binding contract for both the Landlord/Management Company and the Tenants that Sign them. If either party does not abide by the terms in that signed contract, they may be in breach of contract. This may mean a tenant removes the owners property, such as anyobject, furnishing, or appliance which is included in your apartment at the time the lease is signed. A refrigerator or stove would be a good example of this. It may also apply if a Landlord or Property Manager fails to make necessary repairs or to enforce the rules and conditions of the lease. This could include such things as replacing a broken water heater or making reasonable attempts to resolve noise disputes between tenants which are outlined in the lease. All in all, My wife and I are very easy people to get along with and consider ourselves generally aware and respectful to those around us. That is, until our good nature has been insulted. Now we are standing up for our rights and will seek whatever remedy works out best for us. So far we have sent the Certified Letters and are waiting on the results and return receipts from them. We have also filled out the civil suit forms and criminal complaint forms so they are ready to hand to the District Courts if no resolution is found in the next month or so. I will close with this comment: "Yes it is true that kids will be kids, but parents.... you must still be parents so someone else doesn't have to take on that role in your place."...See Morecreepy neighbour
Comments (6)I agree with chinacat... He may be rude and annoying, and possible mentally ill, but it doesn't sound like he's doing anything threatening, dangerous, or illegal. By all means, address any specific concerns with your landlord, but it's really not a crime to be "moderately demented,totally drug-f**ked and absolutely disgusting", as you so nicely put it. You are letting HIM push YOUR buttons. Calm down. Ignore him. Have as little to do with him as possible. If you don't like him, just ignore him. If he comes to your door and doesn't speak, simply close the door. If he asks you to turn down the music, don't converse, just calmly close the door and turn the music down 1 notch if you feel like it (or don't.) Don't you use your peephole before answering the door? If you see it's him, feel free not to open the door. Don't have a peephole? Now THAT'S something to discuss with your landlord. If he sits down on a bench where you are sitting and you don't like it, get up and walk away. You don't owe him an explanation (nor do you own the bench), and conversation and confrontation will simply prolong these encounters that you seem to find so difficult to deal with. I can't see why you think you have to apply conflict resolution principles to communicate with him and work things out amicably. What's to work out? You don't like him. Big deal. Welcome to the big wide world that's full of people not to like. Frankly, with the way you have come completely uncorked over this, I would be more concerned if I were the other guy and had to deal with YOUR weird vibes....See Morenoisy sex upstairs
Comments (8)oh no i couldn't cause problems like that lol and neither is ever at work at night. They have a dog recently got it and they are now at 10:27pm rolling a ball on the floor n the dog is running back n forth after it.I dont know how to explain it but it sounds like an iron ball rolling and the dogs running sounds the same,How can we hear things so loud? My husband a guy that doesn't care about sounds was like is the dog wearing shoes?(he too notices) lol "saying how fun it was to see them the other night while their partner was at work, etc!"...See MoreUser
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last yearDebbie Downer
last yearlast modified: last yearlaceyvail 6A, WV
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