Being the noisy neighbor
litlmnms
19 years ago
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litlmnms
19 years agolast modified: 9 years agotundrashrub
19 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
Are we inconsiderate/noisy neighbors?
Comments (26)We live on the top floor with our son. We are usually homebodies and are always at home. We never have anybody over except for my son's cousins for sleepovers and only happens several months in between they have one. Our downstairs neighbor is a certified crazy lady. She came up to our door and in a loud voice accused me of trying to ruin her whole life. She said we were too noisy and we need to keep it down and she's been holding it in for months. I told her I was sorry she felt that way and I would work on it. I had a headache and I am not confrontational and a fight with this woman was not happening. The only thing that happened that was loud was my son falling over on his chair. Happened once that morning. She next came up and talked to my husband to complain about rolling noises she kept hearing. It was my son playing with a suitcase. She as pleasant to my husband and talked to him for twenty minutes. Talked about life and her kids. Also sneaked in that our toilet seat was loud and she could hear it downstairs. My husband said he had no idea and would try to remember. So we did. My son I cannot account for as he forgets all the time but he is reminded when I see or hear him in the bathroom. We have always been careful with our son making too much noise. He cannot run in hallways. No stomping or heavy footfalls, no screaming or yelling. No slamming of doors. No loud tv sounds. We even watch to make sure we put on our jeans carefully so our foot doesn't fall too loudly when it comes down. Anyway, she came up a third time during the day to complain to me. Apparently, we were too loud again. Only thing I was doing was working on dough on our dining table to make into Christmas ornaments. I wasn't even slapping it onto the table. Just kneading it a lot. No, hey um you're making too much noise again. Immediate screaming, yelling, cursing, and accused me also of rearranging furniture all the time. She threatened to call the cops on me. I told her to go ahead and do it. Later on, when I headed out, I could hear her clearly talking to the downstairs neighbor that she didn't know where I came from and what language I spoke to which I interrupted and said I spoke English very well and understand a lot of the language. She probably realized I had heard her and made an excuse that she was referring to me being psycho and that's why she said I didn't know anything. Oh, I am Asian by the way, full on Asian, immigrant, moved here permanently because my husband lives here. He is white by the way. I don't understand how she can call me psycho when our only interaction was 10 minutes from the 1st time she complained. She also talked to my husband pleasantly which surprised me and kinda made me a little mad that she was nice to him and not to me. I am home all the time, my husband works all day. So I honestly think she knows who she is going to talk to at certain times of the day. Daytime me, nighttime and weekends potentially my husband. We've lived in the same apartment for almost four years now. And while it might not be fun to be downstairs, her being so confrontational and being choosy with who to be that way with, has been no laugh trip either. We are being accommodating to her situation and we do not have any quarrels with other neighbors. If she can be nicer with her requests, with me not just my husband, then we would be more than happy to be more accommodating....See MoreWorried about noise issues with new apartment
Comments (6)The reason vents travel noise is they vibrate. If you can reduce the vibrations it will help. Hard to recomend how without seeing. You dont want to seal them off. Definatly invite the guy up. #1 he will appreaciate the invite and should be more accepting of the noise, also would be expecting it. #2 If after a few games the noise bothers him and he doesn't come up, its easy for him to mention it to you. #3 He may come up and get a new friend or ali I had a great uncle that I only saw every 10 years or so. He was at a family football party. It was really, really loud. Even though he sat quietly I talked to him and he was loving the noise and atmosphere. Turns out he was a HUGE football fan. Just was to old and on oxygen then. It really made his day to be invited back for more games. Good luck. If you live in a area where the vents aren't necessary all year, perhaps stuffing them with sponges would reduce the vibrations. Don't do this during a cold winter or a hot summer if its A/C...See MoreNoisy Neighbor or Poor Construction?
Comments (6)I actually heard the lightswitch turn on, then the toilet seat go up or down the last time I checked, it's not the easy to deliberately make an excessive amount of noise with a LIGHTSWITCH! So you're right, the building is not going to help mask any noise. But...you were asleep until the music went on, right? Music late at night is a no-no, and if they get evicted for that, you don't need to feel guilty. True, perhaps they might have gotten away w/ low-volume music in a different apartment building, but they just have to cope w/ the bad-construction problem as long as they live here; they cope by not playing music at all when it's late, perhaps. But you should NOT be complaining about other noises--walking (as long as there are carpets, and unless you feel it's extreme stomping), toilets flushing, and maybe even the squeaking. Some noise, you can't control, and if that level of noise leakage bothers you, YOU will need to move to a less noisy building. It sounds like, until the music woke you in the middle of the night, you might have otherwise slept through the lightswitch, toilet, etc. Maybe even the squeaking. So they DO have an opportunity to keep the noise low enough for you to put up with it--as long as they're not playing music in the bedroom at night. They may *think* they're playing it low enough, but if lightswitches are coming through, then they really can't have ANY music after 10pm. And I'm wondering--what wakes you? the music? Or walking? Or something else? And how long have you lived there, and have you always had a problem w/ noise? Bcs if a previous neighbor lived peacefully above you, then the building's not the problem (even if it's not helping much). If you were on nicer terms w/ your neighbors, you could perhaps make a pact w/ one another that you won't flush in the middle of the night, if that's one of the things that wakes you. Or you could perhaps say, "I noticed last night, when the music woke me up, that part of the problem is the BUILDING, and I could hear all these other noises. So that's an indicator that the music can't be at ANY level after bedtime, even if in another building you were able to play the music at a low level." Best of luck. Maybe now that you've realized how easily noise carries, you'll find it easier to be sympathetic toward the folks upstairs, realizing that it's not their general crumminess so much as it is the situation you both are living in, w/ an unforgiving building. And understanding that they perhaps are feeling frustrated because here they are, threatened w/ being evicted, and all they're doing is normal life. Perhaps you'll feel less under seige from them; it's not good for you, to be angry at the people over your head all the time. And maybe you can be more sympathetic to music at other times of the day, like 8pm, or something, when you're not trying to sleep at 3am. but frankly, anyone in an apt. who turns on music at 3am deserves to get evicted. Not at 8pm, perhaps, unless it's really, really booming. But after 10pm, sorry, no music....See Moreanother noisy neighbor posting - help!
Comments (8)You sound as miserable as we are, that I wrote in the previous post. I know they all suggested we call the police, but this guy is a maniac, the management knows and we have called the police, but unless the wife does something about her husband, we can't press charges. I just wanted to say that I sympathize with you regarding unrelenting noise and we too have pondered about just forgoing our deposit and getting the heck out of here. We are planning on buying a house and it is in the works so once you know an end is in sight, the noise seems to not be so annoying. We deal with the same things, it seems that everything these people pick up, they drop, our ceiling fans shake, our pictures get all crooked from all the stomping, banging and they too don't know how to just close a front door, they must slam it as hard as possible and then thunder up the stairs. I never understood why people with kids would even think to live upstairs, knowing that they obviously are going to have a hard time respecting people below, but that is just me thinking that people care.......lol Best of luck to you, and yes, I would probably pack up, tell my friend I was sorry but I cannot live this way and chuck the security. I don't know what state you are in but in my state if you have made reasonable attempts to settle problems in an apt and to no avail, management cannot sue you for the remainder of the lease. Best wishes, angel...See Morecamlan
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