Masonary Kiva Fireplace refresh
Lisa Nel
2 years ago
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Lyn Nielson
2 years agoLisa Nel
2 years agoRelated Discussions
I am new, and I have to vent or self destruct!!!
Comments (8)What a tough day, you are a hero, you know. And a good vent can be very satisfying. What about putting her in an Adult Day Care program every day. They are very good, it will give her a chance to get out of the house and do things, and give you the break you need. They are well worth it. Your mother sounds bored - she's needs to "keep busy" and she finds whatever catches her eye, and does it, even if it makes no sense to you. Of course she doesn't want to go to a nursing home, not too many of us wake up and decide today is the day to move to a nursing home. But it looks like it's time to get her out of your home. It's not doing your or your granddaughter any good having her there with this much chaos and anger and frustration. The tables have turned, now you and your husband have to make that decision, and see that it gets done. But..... once there, she'll be fine, she'll be happier there than at home with you. Good nursing homes have lots of activities and lots of supervision, and good care. And your weekly visits with her will be a treat, not an ordeal. Medicare won't pay for a nursing home unless she needs it for sub-acute rehab - and then only for a short time. If she has no money, Medicaid will pay for her care. If she has money, that would go toward nursing home expenses, she must get some money every month - Social Security/pension, etc. Why do you think you have to pay the entire cost? Your energy should go towards taking care of yourself, your husband and your dear granddaughter - his mother should not be at the top of the list. You know you are not going to hurt her, or your grandchild. That leaves you, and your marriage. And if your husband leaves, you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he'll leave his mom with you. LOL You are doing an amazing job, and have every right to be angry with her, even if she doesn't know what she did. It's still a waste of your time, money and the food you prepared. My mother had Alzheimers, for 15 years, and my dad took care of her for most of that time, and she became very difficult. After 10 years, we sat down with dad and said that it was time to move to a retirement community, he fought us for almost a year. After they moved, he loved it, said it was the best thing he ever did. After a few years, we insisted mom go to adult day care, and he fought that, but she loved it, and he could finally do some things for himself. The next year it was clear that it was time for her to move to the nursing home in their retirement community. She had become violent and was hitting him, and didn't sleep at night. She got out of their apartment a few times, even with an alarm. Even so, he fought that too, but the move went well, she was much happier and so was he. She died 9 months later. My dad lived for 6 more years. For 4 1/2 years, he remained in his own apartment, with some help after he had a stroke. Eventually he moved to the assisted living facility, and 3 months later, to the nursing home in the retirement community. He died there a year later. Both of my parents had excellent care, they loved the staff, and we were confident we'd made the right decisions. Take a deep breath, have a good cry, and hug that wonderful granddaughter and dear husband....See MoreTalk me out of painting my fireplace
Comments (153)I understand your angst. I felt the same way before I painted my very very dark brown brick fireplace. I painted the fireplace a little darker than the walls in our FR. Painting the fireplace lightened up the entire room. We went from having a dark, dreary FR to one that was light and bright, and a pleasure to be in. The key to painting a fireplace is the prep. The brick has to be cleaned with TSP (trisodium phosphate. Once all of the dirt is removed, then the brick has to be primed. It will take several coats of paint to cover the brick. Once it is painted the first time, the next time will be easier. I have never regretted the fact that I painted the brick. My husband (who loves brick), agrees with me that the room is much better to be in , and that painting the brick was the right thing to do!...See MoreHow Do YOU Choose A Picture - Your Art - For Over Your Fireplace
Comments (28)My husband wanted to put up this ugly reproduction of a horse race painting that he found at a garage sale, I told him "give me a week, I'll find something better online!" I wanted a modern look, some realisitc photography, but I didn't want black and white because we have so many b&w prints in the house already. I finally bought a color print of a park scene (some park in NYC, I'm not sure which) at a web site called Brooklyn Prints. Every mantle is different, of course; I had just enough space to put up a 16x20 print in a wood frame. Our fireplace is for decoration only, so we didn't have to worry about heat damage to the frame or the print, but it is something to think about too. Here is a link that might be useful: Brooklyn Prints...See MoreWhat would you do with a week alone?
Comments (50)I just thought I'd report back on my week alone! These are some of the things I did, in no particular order: Went to the movies alone to see Bad Moms; laughed my head off. Binge watched Stranger Things on Netflix, but only during daylight hours because it scared me. Ate chips and dip for dinner one night. In general, ate whatever and whenever I wanted, which may have been the highlight for this mom of three who has been cooking for others for 24 years! (And I hate to cook.) Cleaned my side of the master bedroom closet, reaping two bags of "rejects" for Goodwill. Had about 15 friends over for a cocktail party one night. Walked 2-3 miles most mornings. Got my ears pierced! (Had them double pierced already, got the third piercing with a friend who got a second piercing. We felt like 18 year olds.) Had lunch with friends one day. Spent an afternoon clothes shopping, followed by a massage and a facial. Oh, and I spent one full day in my pajamas. This, along with a discussion with a friend who went on an extended trip alone, led DH and me to decide that we might try separate vacations for one week each year. For a week, he can go someplace he wants to go, without me or the kids, and ditto for me. This wouldn't replace family vacation time, but will give us each a chance to truly get a break from the day to day stuff, the kids, and let's face it, each other! (We are happily married but a week alone is still a good thing!) So now I am fantasizing about where to take my first solo trip......See MoreBeth H. :
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Lisa NelOriginal Author