Follow up to my atypical ruptured appendix post
5 years ago
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What's up with the Middleton's
Comments (23)I did a poor job of being clear, so will try one last time. What propelled my thoughts, and prompted my post, was the timing of these incidents coinciding with my young niece's struggle with grasping what boundaries are OK and what aren't. (She just turned 12, quotes are her words.) She hasn't ever been permitted to be exposed to just anything, as much as her parents can control anyway. But at her age kids hear, see, share & talk about things, especially on the heels of a wedding that's created a tremendous buzz. What matters is she's confused about behavior & boundaries, photos & boundaries, attention (good or bad) and boundaries. She knows it wasn't OK for her friend to send a pic text to a boy as a joke while wearing cami-top underwear & a neon wig at a birthday sleepover. A joke her friend did in a moment of 1 a.m. slumber party giddiness just after snapping pics of the family dog wearing his shaving cream beard. Sadly, my niece learned at a young age it's not OK for a grown man to collect photos of (at the time) 7-9 yr old children in group settings and then call them or stalk their public events. All she knows is he was a "creeper" who went to jail. She recently saw a "famous wedding". And she doesn't quite get why the important maid of honor Pippa Long Stockings (what they call her due to her unusual name) "got more famous on the internet" for things that would bring either punishment or bad ("creeper") attention in my niece's world. And there was her "She knows about creepers, right?" comment. :/ She just simply doesn't understand where the boundaries of OK behavior start/stop. And frankly I don't either. Because it just keeps coming down the pike in droves. From the 6th grader doing it for 'approval' or whatever motivates them to the sister of the future queen, it's everywhere. And it would be nice to see the trend sway from a little less raunchy toward a little more self-dignity. Hopefully it's a little clearer now where I was coming from. And if my thoughts and viewpoint result in me being viewed as a prude, not fully enlightened or unworldly, I have zero problem with that....See MoreStepdaughters' lies and blaming stepmom
Comments (22)Hi all, I'm new. I just want to say that many of the issues you mention really aren't YOUR issues. Things like her fraudulant lawsuits for example. I have an ex who's always frauding someone...but it's not my problem. The system will catch up and when it does, they'll have to pay somehow. You need to focus on dealing with the children when they're in your care, and disregard what they do in her care, unless they're in danger. You seem to have stopped the spanking but maybe you should make their Dad handle all the discipline. You could even try a "wait until your father gets home" stance when they are in your care and your husband is away. Once you stop engaging with them, they will stop engaging with you. You've only been married two years, so you have a long road ahead. Your nit-picky issues are just that, little nit-picky issues. I'd blow them off and laugh it off as a jealous bio-mom...those do exists sometimes. You know YOU and those around you know YOU...don't waste your time focusing on what she says or does. Keep documenting everything and always anticipate the worst, but hope for the best. If the relationship with the girls is broken, I'd really try mending it. If you're interested in some ways, let me know, maybe we can get creative. If you plan to stay married, you really need to get along with his kids, they don't go away after they turn 18, only the CS....See MoreBuilding Code Requirements for when walls/ceilings are opened up
Comments (18)The MA code used to have its own unique and very forgiving chapter for existing houses. That code allowed an existing uninsulated exposed wall and/or rafter cavity to be fully filled with the equivalent of fiberglass insulation if not structurally modified. Appendix J of the new code (2009 IRC) has been amended by the Mass Amendments as quoted above. The fill-the-cavity rule is no longer to be found or at least I can't find it. That might be a good thing to ask more than one inspector because you might get more than one answer. Good luck with that. However, the prescriptive section of the Stretch Code (in towns where adopted) still has the fill-the-cavity rule: Option 2) Prescriptive path: partial house option (HERS rater not required) Any portions of a building modified by renovation must be brought up to code, or insulated to fill open wall/ceiling/floor cavities whichever is less. Any new windows, doors or skylights must meet Energy Star 5.0 standards. Any new ducted heating or cooling systems outside the insulated space must be tested and meet a maximum of 4% leakage to outside. Builders must complete the relevant portions of the Energy Star Homes Thermal checklist. ---------- I recommend using this standard even if your town has not adopted it. There should never be any ducted heating or cooling systems outside the insulated space of the house....See MoreHelp Me Be Proud of My Living Room
Comments (39)Pleasant looking room. I do like your oversized "portrait art over the wine cabinet in the third pic. Having items piled at the bottom of the steps could be a trip/fall hazard you might want to move to a closet. Some suggestions for your consideration: First pic: Your curtain rod may well need a pair of supports between the two end supports. At first glance, though I cannot see the bottom of the drapes, it appears you're still using that sloppy drapes drag the floor look. Raise your rod and add extra supports so the rod doesn't sag and the drapes don't drag. Also, You might try removing all but the two square pillows from the sofa. Second pic: You could probably find a better suited table for in front of the window between the sofa and chair (and get a second one for the other side of the sofa, too). While I do like the table, it seems more modern than the other furnishings. You might move the small metal legged table by the window to the bedroom. Third pic: That wine cabinet / bookcase corner is too "crowded" -- too busy -- and the contrast between the short white wine cabinet and tall black shelving is stark and not particularly appealing. You could move that mirror leaning against the wall to the interior of a bedroom or bathroom closet, along with whatever that is atop the tall dark shelving. Then paint both of these pieces the pale blue color from your rug. Fourth pic: Would make the "closet" to the right of the tv (now with doors on bottom w/open shelves on top) be an actual closet with a half dozen shelves at the back of the closet but with some space between the shelves and a full length door for hooks inside that solid full length door for hanging coats and/or backpacks, etc....See More- 5 years ago
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