"An older lady gets pulled over for speeding"... Older Woman: Is there a problem, officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Older Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Older woman: Is there e a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too. Don't Mess With Old Ladies

April 25 is ANZAC Day in Australia and New Zealand, the equivalent of the US Veterans’ Day. It was chosen because on April 25, 1915. the Australia and New Zealand Army Corps stormed the beaches at Gallipoli in what was ultimately a failed camapign to take the Gallipoli Peninsula from the Turks led by Kemal Attaturk. It was the first campaign in which there were major losses for the ANZACs. There is usually a special service held by Australian and New Zealand participants at Gallipoli on ANZAC Day, which is facilitated by the Turks, and towns all over both countries have a Dawn Service and usually a parade and wreath laying ceremony later in the day for all returned service personnel, as well as other activities commemorating the day.

Hahah katlan, especially tricky as you needed your left leg to work the clutch!

While drinking and driving are forbidden (in many areas) ... ... I'm not sure of this, not having been a smoker since for about 6 mos. or so at about age 16, I'm pretty sure that drinking while smoking that cigar is going to require a good deal of agility! Or having to deal with soiled clothing, furniture, etc. ole joyful