Wouldn’t it be nice if City Hall could hold such things outside? Front lawn of the building? Gee, a tent in the parking lot? Then at least a couple of family members could watch.

Have each would-be guest make a life size cardboard copy of themselves with an actual picture of their face glued to the cardboard face, and a nice letter. Ask the JP or his/her assistant if you can borrow chairs, and just before the ceremony, seat the cardboard people. Make a video (if permitted) and send a copy to each guest after the ceremony.

Around here we do parades with the fire dept and police and so on....I wonder if they have friends and neighbors in the area who would be willing to do something similar.

With the prevalence of "trained/certified" wedding officiates..I think I would get one of their friends or father of the groom certified and do the tent outdoor thing as mentioned above. Actually all the ideas are snap on!! What is the allowed gathering? We are 200 here--but probably not what they want...but to get together 10 or so outside in a tent...IDK seems doable. Our pastor taped the recent Church directory pictures to all the pews...it made the televised Masses easier on everyone. IDK if you need the cardboard cut outs but pictures on chairs would work.

Will the groom’s parents be able to come in from out of state? How many close family members are local?

It will depend on how the courthouse handles it. They need to check before to see how many people can be present for the wedding if they distance. There will never be space enough for all that wish to be there but it may be possible that the immediate family with a limit is allowed to be there. No kissing on the cheek or hugging except for the bride and groom. Some courthouses do video tape the ceremony which may be a charge but that could be sent to family members.

If a small ensemble could stand along the walkway leading to the courthouse, perhaps holding ribbons and flowers and perhaps a canopy to make an aisle, then greet them again with champagne as they emerge (if that is allowed in public space), it could make a nice experience. And film it all, of course!

A young couple in town here had to cancel their big planned wedding. On the day of the wedding the bride donned her gown, the groom was in a tux and they stood outside their venue and invited guests got all dressed in their finery, decorated their cars with signs and balloons and drove by the young couple, windows down offering their best wishes. It looked like fun. So, an auto parade of well-wishers would be my suggestion. Like your nephew, they plan on a big celebration next year.

I'm cynical about some things. I always thought I'd be doing a lot of travelling in my retirement years. Here I am, stuck at home. What should I do? I deal with it.

Some people thought they would have a big wedding celebration when the time came. No, not a good choice at the moment. Hopefully they can deal with it.

We all need to deal with reality. Wish them well, they'll have a lifetime to party with friends, and can celebrate their marriage when the time is right. They can show their love for friends and families by soldiering on the way the rest of us are and skipping any effort to have an ersatz event that could endanger themselves or others. And friends and families can show their support by accepting their (hopefully) good judgment to defer celebrations (not the wedding, no need to do that) without moaning about it.

Stuff happens.

The wedding celebration is a once in a lifetime event. Marriage is a lifetime event. During these times, focus on the priority.

"The wedding celebration is a once in a lifetime event."

Death is once in a lifetime too.

My cousins recently had a 50th anniversary so their daughter asked everyone to put together some video of remembrances and well wishes which they then edited into a single video to give them as we couldn't have a proper party. The hope is we will at sometime in the future. I think something like that with some fun childhood memories and well wishes for the future, maybe some funny advice for a happy marriage would make a special gift for them, esp with so much of her family being so far away.

I like the suggestion to do it outside if possible. Then you could have a few invited guests sitting on lawn chairs spaced appropriately. Make it festive with flowers, ribbons, balloons and music. If weather is a factor they could consider having a tent erected and have a caterer provide pre-packaged food and beverages.

My son applied for some kind of certificate and has married two couples. I think it's possible to make this a special event without compromising anyone's health. And of course a lot of this depends on what the regulations are in their town and the behavior of the guests.

How about on the beach?

Wet Wedding

Quite a few good ideas above -- fun and safe.

How about arranging some decorated chairs for the happy couple to stand in front of. Each chair could have a helium filled ballon -- with a funny face drawn on it! That would appeal to DH & my sense of humor. (but then, we're both Gary Larson fans.)

I applaud all couples who keep their dates and move forward with what it is. I agree totally it's the marriage that is important--and the only way to that is a wedding. GET IT DONE and consider your party options later,. Hopefully with some hindsight couples will realize the money for these lavish parties is outlandish. We are being called to simpler lives. Lives that sustain all not just those that have the most money. With any luck in a year or more couples will have moved past their need to be QUEEN for a day...and find more important, life sustaining uses for 30 thousand dollars!!!

City Halls don't really throw weddings. They are willing to officiate unions. Beaches and outdoor lawn gatherings are pretty much right out for a CH union.

It is my opinion that the very most romantic and meaningful thing a couple can do is to wed in private. It may not be a popular opinion. I realize that.

My son and his wife flew to Hawaii to get married on the beach, just the two of them and person who did the ceremony and a photographer.

This followed his sister's more traditional wedding and I think that it was a great idea.

I am not a fan of weddings such as they mostly are. I find them boring and repetitive.

I do realize that some feel differently about them.

We have a nephew who is planning a wedding this coming October. I don't have much hope for that wedding, at all. It will require travel that I am betting husband and I will not want to make at that time. Not only are we getting older, less confident and more vulnerable, the world is in chaos that is only going to get worse as this hot mess of politics plays out against a backdrop of rampant disease. It is going to be a rough ride. Weddings are not on my future plans, at all.

arcy , I agree with everything that you said. My sister and her husband spend upwards of $50,000 on a wedding for their son. This son remains unemployed even after graduating college and his wife is also still in school and unemployed. With the exception of some small jobs, this couple are still dependent on each of their parents to pay all expenses. And, they are both over 25 years old.

That money could have gone a long way to support them and give them a leg up.

Of course, they had to have the traditional honeymoon to Italy. That cost a darned shiny penny, or two, as well.

On another related note, with international travel so severely impacted, there are other relationships that are suffering as well.

My daughter in law is from China. She has been a citizen for some time now, but her parents are still in China. We share two little grandchildren with them and it pains me that it is uncertain whether they will ever see them again. They have been diligent about coming here for extended stays so that they can be with the kids. I know that they love the kids as much as we do. They are mid 60s and it will get harder for them to travel here in good times. Bad times is even worse.

Dallasannie, I feel the same. In my family, small weddings are considered good luck. (And some of the biggest weddings in my family have been followed by divorce.) The couple should consider it an opportunity to avoid huge amounts of stress and wasted money. I believe a lot of "Bridezillas" are probably nice people who fell victim to the stress of trying to make everything "perfect." People who are absolutely rational every other day freak out when the hydrangeas are the wrong shade of blue. It's nuts. The couple can have a nice party in the future on which they can spend more thoughtfully, and have better quality visiting with their guests. In the meantime, they can get married and take a few pictures to share with friends and family. That's what Facebook and Instagram are for.

I agree with all those that mentioned cards, cardboard, but no people (Except the couple and the officiant). The risk of Covid as an unwanted wedding gift is too high, and how sad it would be if anyone died as a result of a wedding ceremony.

My nephew was married in May. It was supposed to be held at the Cape but instead they were married at their church with just their parents and attendants. We surprised them....about 100 of us...relatives and friends....with decorated cars...balloons...signs attached to cars....music blaring....and ending with a firetruck. The police blocked off the street so we could proceed without interruption...Once the neighbors realized what was happening...they even joined in with clapping....it was beautiful to see the bride and groom’s smiling faces on their wedding day....on a day that turned out to be very special after all.

The other thing is if, instead of just going to City Hall, they could get a Justice of the Peace and get married in some place interesting and special. I went hiking to a "castle" actually a tower, and there was a couple getting married there by a single officiant...what a gorgeous setting with a view...or on a beach or by a waterfall or all kinds of places.

I love Annie's idea. It seems so memorable and personal.

How about the outside dining area of a nice restaurant? The couple and a few family and friends. Find a spot for the ceremony then everyone enjoys a nice lunch or dinner.

The worst part of a celebration today is you're bringing people out of a safe place, their home, to a probable unsafe place.

I would think that the parents could witness the marriage if they maintained safe distance. There could not be any hugs or handshaking afterward, but photos could be taken. It would seem empty compared to a normal ceremony, however, as stated above, personal closeness could be allowed in a later reception - much later after the virus has abated.

Some states recognize a "self-uniting" marriage--a Quaker license. Maybe that would help. You just get married--no officiant. I can offer no other details but I do have a friend who was married this way.

Most counties require a witness to the wedding and that person also signs the official wedding certificate to be filed at the court house.

Side note: In the eyes of the court, a pair is not considered legally married until the wedding certificate has been filed. While searching my family's history, I found 2 wedding dates for my grandmother; one date on the day of the ceremony and a second date two weeks later when it was filed. Before automobiles, Pastors often collected wedding papers and went to the court house maybe once or twice per month to file the wedding certificates. There was a hazard: If something happened to the Pastor in the interim and the papers never filed; That can cause problems at later times when probating an estate or other legal matters.

jemdandy it still happens. When I went to renew my drivers license a couple of years ago I needed to present a certified copy of my marriage license. We were married on a Saturday. The license was not filed until Monday it came with the notation Married on Monday and the date. That was in 1983.

Yeah, I somehow think that it's not very romantic to get married in a government building where you're there with people paying their property taxes or filing a deed. And getting married in an outdoor location is so much safer for all in attendance.