Jenn, If it isn't a seedling, and the mother tree produces, there are other possibilities. Some varieties are known for rampant growth at the expense of fruit. One that has been mentioned at length on the FF is Danny's Delight. Hopefully, they will settle down with age. Another is that you are contributing to this type of behavior by treating it too well. Figs don't really need a lot of fertilizer or water (it's been said that it leads to less flavor, "watery" figs and even less hardiness - see the link below for a thread with sergnic, an Italian grower's, input). And a variety that's inclined to be vegetative is going to be encouraged to continue with a lot of nitrogen and moisture. If the nearby friend's tree isn't from the same mother tree that yours is, you really can't compare them. Even plants of the same variety from different sources can behave differently (strange as it sounds). But, in my opinion, it wouldn't hurt to do "absolutely nothing" to your tree - TLC isn't working. Here is a link that might be useful: Italian Fig Grower

Fairly normal for Ficus to put out a lot of aerial roots in a humid environment, although I haven't noticed it as much with Fiddle Leafs. Probably in the nursery they were kept fairly crowded and moist. If it has a good root system below the soil then cutting the exposed roots shouldn't make any difference.

Your soil must be wet most of the time if you have 'tons' of them. You could use bamboo skewer or chopstick (or a thinner dowel with sharpened end) to test if soil is still too moist. It should be inserted about 3/4 deep into pot for few minutes. I do not grow banana plant, so I do not know how moist they like it. But I have other tropicals in containers - brugmansias, figs, loquat - these are all quite big and also like more water (more than succulents I grow). I have many other plants, smaller but still tropicals. They are outdoors now, but have to be brought indoors for the winter. I do not have FG problem - sure, there may be occasional fly, but very seldom and very, very few. No standing water; watering when needed; good air circulation (using fan helps if needed); no organic debris left - just few things to do to help. If you have many FG, you need to find why and eliminate them. In the meantime, you could try sticky tapes to catch adults (hopefully less eggs to hatch). Top dressing of gravel should help some, not deep as you suggested. Small gravel is better than fine sand (I don't know how small or big is what you used). Sand is too fine and may impair drainage. Get Bti - available in granules (?) or liquid - and use when watering. Easy way is to get mosquito dunks and dissolve small piece in water yo use. Bti is safe to humans and pets, but will kill larvae. These are just immediate helpful tips and unless real reason why they are there in such numbers is found and eliminated, they 'will be back' :) Since I have no experience with neem, I do not know if it was OK for banana plant or not. Hopefully someone that knows will comment.

How is that fig Matt ? Did it fruit ? I have one unknown too it has fruit but it will not have enough time to ripe.