A good wife brings balance to a man's life

Southern Divorce

A judge was interviewing a Memphis,Tennessee, woman regarding her pending divorce and asks, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

"About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

"It is made of concrete, brick, and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "what are your relations like?"

"I have an aunt and uncle and 12 cousins living here in town, as well as my husband's parents."

The judge took a deep breath and asked, "Do you have a real grudge?"

"No, we have a two-car carport and have never really needed one cuz we really don't even have a car."

"Please," he tried again, "is there infidelity in your marriage?"

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music - all that hip hop and rap trash - but we can't seem to do anything about it."

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?"

"Yes, he gets up every morning before I do and makes the coffee."

The judge asked, "Is your husband a nagger?"

"Oh, hell no, he's as white as you and me!"

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why in hell do you want a divorce?

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce, my husband does.

The damn fool says he can't communicate with me."

Friend's grandson all tuckered out after a day at pre school!

A ventriloquist is performing with his dummy on his lap. He’s telling a dumb-blonde joke when a young platinum-haired beauty jumps to her feet. “What gives you the right to stereotype blondes that way?” she demands. “What does hair colour have to do with my worth as a human being?”

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer out an apology.

“You keep out of this!” she yells. “I’m talking to that little jerk on your knee!”

Hi jasdip,

Is yours a locally generated story?

You're about as far south in Canada as one can get ...

... unless you move to Windsor - or Kingsville.

Or have a Pelee of laughter - this being a joke thread. (Canada's most southern spot is Pelee Island, in Lake Erie).

Oh, now I get it - you're having a North American viewpoint (the part north of the Rio Grande, that is).

Hope you're havin' a good more-or-less fall day.

ole joyful

Some really good ones today !!

Sotty - I guess I missed the "Memphis, Tennessee" part.

I do claim to not be "sotted" (let alone "besotted") and this time I can scarcely blame the device's helper.

That was supposed to be "sorry" but sometimes one's fingers tend to go where they please.

ole joyful